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Old 03-17-2007, 03:05 PM   #1
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sunnyaz58 HB User
divorce and bipolar

Hi I am new to your sight and just searching for a site that I can come to when things just seem a tad overwhelming to me. I was diagnosed May 2005 that I was bipolar and in Feb 2007 I had to admit myself back in the hospital cause I wasn't staying on my meds and while in there my wife decided to serve me papers and say that I wasn't welcome in the house I had lived in for 30 yrs prior to her ever coming into my life. She sent the papers the third day I was in their and it didnt' help my spirits at all so of course it took me a few extra days in the hospital before the doctor would let me out. I am doing better but at times just need support and from looking at some of the messages on here I think I may have found a home. My family and especially my friends have rallied around me and support me whole heartedly while I deal with the divorce. So I just want to say I hope I am able to help anyone as well as have someone help me when we seem to hit some rough roads ahead. At the moment I am doing great but this morning was a tad tense for me and came on here and decided to join the message board.
Neal

 
Old 03-17-2007, 03:16 PM   #2
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marshmallow HB User
Re: divorce and bipolar

Welcome Neal, I know you will find much support here and everyone will welcome your input. I am sorry about your situation and hope it will improve.

 
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Old 03-17-2007, 08:52 PM   #3
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Re: divorce and bipolar

thanks marshmellow, I seem to sit and think of what I have done to deserve this. she makes it seem like it is all my fault and I see so manythings that she did to not help my situation. but I guess now I need to focus on myself and helping myself through this hard time.

 
Old 03-18-2007, 03:09 AM   #4
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mudhound HB User
Re: divorce and bipolar

Neal, Welcome to the board. I am married to a person who has BP. It's tough on me but so far (22 year) I have been able to stay married.
The easy way out looks so good at times and I have been close to the "D" word.
Stay around here. You will find loads of support.
__________________
God Bless

Mudhound

 
Old 03-18-2007, 11:13 PM   #5
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sunnyaz58 HB User
Re: divorce and bipolar

Thanks Mudhound,
Its nice to know that there are some that can have a marriage last that long. I hope I am able to help others to as I am trying to view this bipolar differently.

Neal

 
Old 03-19-2007, 01:47 AM   #6
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michael178 HB User
Re: divorce and bipolar

Bipolar is a difficult to adjust to when it strikes a loved one. I am a parent, my son is bipolar. He still lives with us, and I really like having him home. The hardest part is the beginning, especially for the sick person. But others around him or her are affected too. Unfortunately, your wife wanted to split. But I think you might be beating both yourself up a little too much. You have a serious disease which bit you hard, you cannot blamed, and it is obvious from the tone of your post that you are sensitive and understanding. The trick is to keep on your meds and allow yourself to adjust to the new you. Get through this a day at a time, reduce all the stress in your life, and live the best life you can.

 
Old 03-19-2007, 01:49 AM   #7
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michael178 HB User
Re: divorce and bipolar

Bipolar is a difficult to adjust to when it strikes a loved one. I am a parent, my son is bipolar. He still lives with us, and I really like having him home. The hardest part is the beginning, especially for the sick person. But others around him or her are affected too. Unfortunately, your wife wanted to split. I think you might be beating yourself up too much. You have a serious disease which unfortunately bit you hard, you cannot blamed for it. It is obvious from the tone of your post that you are sensitive and understanding. The trick is to keep on your meds and allow yourself to adjust to the new you. Get through this a day at a time, reduce all the stress in your life, and live the best life you can.

 
Old 03-19-2007, 06:19 AM   #8
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Re: divorce and bipolar

Thanks Micheal, yes I am trying to get as much stress out of my life as I can. I will keep what you said close to my heart when those time of dispair appear. Yes I am a caring and sensitive person.

Neal

 
Old 03-19-2007, 06:36 AM   #9
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marshmallow HB User
Re: divorce and bipolar

sunnyaz you mentioned being a sensitive person. I was wondering if people with bp have heightened sensitivity? My husband always described his pain as so intense that no one could understand it. He would say our not being together was like being in a dark hole yet he refused to take meds that would most likely stop his rage and anger. If the rage stopped and he stopped the violence we would be together. I dont understand how he cannot see that because he always says he wants to be home. I have also told him that if he took meds the pain would not be so great. Things I would say that seemed very minor to me were huge to him. I could never quite understand. Any thoughts.

 
Old 03-20-2007, 04:22 AM   #10
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sunnyaz58 HB User
Re: divorce and bipolar

Well I know that the meds have helped me. Not sure if it would have helped him in his situation. I know that with my meds if I take the everyday, I don't have those mood swings. I look back on my marriage and wonder where I went wrong and the only thing I see is that from 2005 up to before going into the hospita I wasn't taking my meds on a regular basis and so I would have these mood swings. And also I think in this last year my wife had planned all along to get rid of me and she was waiting for the opportunity for me to slip up and then steal everything away from me and then share lie's about me at church. It's no fun when you are the one that is bipolar and your off schedule of your meds as you know what your doing and your so frustrated with yourself that sometimes its just hard to go applogize to your loved ones. The unfortunate thing for me is that my wife thinks what has happened in our relationship is all my faulth and I feel that its both of our faults. But that is another story

Neal

 
Old 03-25-2007, 04:27 PM   #11
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deedeehurtn HB User
Unhappy Re: divorce and bipolar

Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnyaz58 View Post
Hi I am new to your sight and just searching for a site that I can come to when things just seem a tad overwhelming to me. I was diagnosed May 2005 that I was bipolar and in Feb 2007 I had to admit myself back in the hospital cause I wasn't staying on my meds and while in there my wife decided to serve me papers and say that I wasn't welcome in the house I had lived in for 30 yrs prior to her ever coming into my life. She sent the papers the third day I was in their and it didnt' help my spirits at all so of course it took me a few extra days in the hospital before the doctor would let me out. I am doing better but at times just need support and from looking at some of the messages on here I think I may have found a home. My family and especially my friends have rallied around me and support me whole heartedly while I deal with the divorce. So I just want to say I hope I am able to help anyone as well as have someone help me when we seem to hit some rough roads ahead. At the moment I am doing great but this morning was a tad tense for me and came on here and decided to join the message board.
Neal
hi i agree w/ you i had a rough night last night and i find this sight really useful and able to answer alot of my own questions as of why am i going through this my busband is the bi-polar one and has hurt me so bad i feel as if i can't even breathe while he acts as if everything is fine w/ him??? he is on no meds. doesn't feel as if he needs counseling so he actually has never been dx. w/ bi-polar but the rages and name calling, spending,blaming is all signs and it's become a pattern and coming on more and more- he snaps at everyone.. i hurt so bad- he's so hard to lose someone you love. he again for the thrid time left the home, the last 2 times he'll call 2-3 days later and act as if everything is ok. i feel like i'am losing it

 
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