It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Divorce & Separation Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 05-17-2007, 05:06 PM   #1
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: NV
Posts: 139
Ava_31 HB User
when to date after a divorce

How do you know when it is right? After being with my husband of almost 9 years but total 13, I decided to end the marriage because of things he's done. I don't want to just date when I'm in that vulnerable state you know? But, how am I going to know when it's right? This is the time for me to make time for me. I know I'll be focusing on myself. Just wondering.

 
Old 05-17-2007, 09:59 PM   #2
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 299
earthdayapril22 HB User
Re: when to date after a divorce

how long ago did you get divorce?? You should really take time for yourself before looking for other relationships, give time to heal and deal with your previous feelings still running around before engaging in another relationship.
__________________
Have a nice day

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 05-17-2007, 10:57 PM   #3
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 1,045
desertdweller HB User
Re: when to date after a divorce

I had a counselor tell me once that a person should wait on month for every year of marriage before dating again, ie: 10 years marriage, wait 10 months to date. I could never wait that long though, I wanted to have fun right away .

 
Old 05-17-2007, 11:14 PM   #4
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Bragg, NC
Posts: 821
iona_23 HB User
Re: when to date after a divorce

i thought u shouldn't think about that right now. i mean, you can just "date" casually but to look for anything serious....i think should come a little later. as u said, ur vulnerable right now. i really think there shouldn't be a time limit on anything, just make sure that ur mind is clear of things. and that in itself is a battle. goodluck tho.

 
Old 05-17-2007, 11:17 PM   #5
Facilitator
(female)
 
Seraph's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 4,748
Seraph HB UserSeraph HB UserSeraph HB UserSeraph HB UserSeraph HB UserSeraph HB UserSeraph HB UserSeraph HB UserSeraph HB UserSeraph HB UserSeraph HB User
Re: when to date after a divorce

I find that people who go straight from a relationship to a new one have not had time to put down their baggage. Sit and process for a while first. Not to say don't go out and socialise, just beware of starting anything serious. Cheers, Sera

 
Old 05-18-2007, 05:22 AM   #6
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 4,202
happymom28 HB User
Re: when to date after a divorce

When you are ready you will know.

I think you should definately take time for you. 13 years is a long time to be with someone. However, that doesn't mean you should wait years to date again. Don't put too much pressure on yourself to feel a certain way or stick to a certain time frame. Everyone is different. Trust me, when you meet the right person and the time is right you will know without question.

 
Old 05-18-2007, 08:24 AM   #7
ICC ICC is offline
Inactive
(female)
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 3,265
ICC HB UserICC HB UserICC HB User
Re: when to date after a divorce

I feel it's each individuals terms. I was married to an abusive alcoholic for 22 years. Dated him for 4 years before we married. I was soooooooo young I had no idea what alcoholism even was. Our marriage was over for 10 years before I filed for divorce and left. Dated a little, married my husband 2 years after I felt. It was enough time for me as I had grown kids, had spent the better part of my first marriage alone ( not cheating) alone raising my kids , so knew what it was like to live on my own. My marriage to my second husband is healthy and wonderful. you'll know when it's time.


ICC

 
Old 05-18-2007, 04:02 PM   #8
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Florida
Posts: 224
Bluesy HB User
Re: when to date after a divorce

It's hard to say because everyone is different. I would go out with friends and family and have some alone time. Don't do it until you are ready. You could just date around and see people without committment.

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
When do you actually call it quits on the marriage? MSNik Relationship Health 50 11-16-2008 05:03 PM
just when i thought i can control this!!!! deedeehurtn Bipolar Disorder 1098 05-09-2007 06:40 PM
Divorce when manic - how did it all get sorted? suddenlyhere Divorce & Separation 3 03-21-2007 08:29 PM
New here..FIL going to divorce MIL when she is admitted to nursing home.. cindyx4 Divorce & Separation 8 06-18-2006 12:23 PM
Need Opinions - I think the judge will NOW throw out our divorce case farceur66 Divorce & Separation 4 02-09-2006 07:28 AM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



shisslak (5), anonnymouse (4), renko (4), frikita (3), gardenandcats (2), rosequartz (2), Searchin (2), Titchou (2), Misty800 (2), thaliak (2)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1177), MSJayhawk (1004), Apollo123 (903), Titchou (847), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (758), ladybud (753), sammy64 (668), midwest1 (668), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:07 PM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!