parents divorcing after almost 30 years need opinions
i'm not really sure where to post this, but since the main issue is divorce i posted here. I am 26 years old and my parents have recently told me that they are separating. They have always had a model marriage, and in my family of chaos, have been perfect examples for my brother and i of what a marriage should be like.
Last year my mom started spending large amounts of time on the computer. She says this is because she wasn't getting attention from my father. She met a woman who she became friends with online and started spending a huge amount of time talking to her. Like, every night almost all night talking to her. when she wasn't talking to her, she was talking about her to us
The woman lives in England and has come here to visit several times staying at my parents house. I started noticing my mom acting different when the woman was around, and even became annoyed about how much i had to hear about her but didn't want to say anything because i was really glad my mom had found a friend. clearly this was the demise of my parents marriage because they are saying that they grew apart.
There is a part of me that is very angry. Mostly at this woman even though i don't really think it's her fault. My mom is so weird around her and i think their relationship is abnormal. I am not the only one to think this, my husband and brother have said the same thing and we all agree. when they move out and go their seperate ways, my brother doesn't want to live with my mom because he doesn't want to deal with it.
Now my mom is saying that this woman wants to come live here, and will be living with my mom for 6 months. This really bothers me as i am sure that means we are now going to have to be spending holidays with this woman who we barely know. My mom herself has only known her for a year, but says she trusts her with her life.
The whole thing makes me very, very angry for many reasons. i'm angry that this woman seems more important then the rest of us, i'm angry that my mom would rather talk to her then try and work things out with my dad, i'm angry that we are probably going to be "forced" to accept her and treat her like a family member, and i am angry that nobody is standing up and saying anything about this! (including me)
my parents are separating on incredibly friendly terms, they are even still sleeping in the same bed so that is one good thing. However, this woman is coming back for another visit in may. isn't this incredibly inappropriate?!! who comes and stays with a family going through a divorce? i just don't get it and it makes me furious. i need some outside thoughts/opinions of people who are not emotionally involved. Am i being selfish or is this ridiculous? please be brutally honest i need to know.