I was having a discussion with a friend about the fact that my husband has a mental illness and that there is not much hope for him to be getting better (I see tiny baby steps of change every few months, but nothing major at all).
After I said that, my friend asked me, then what makes you stay in your marriage if you dont see him getting better at all? And I said, and I could not believe that I was saying it, I said that I thought that it was my child. I almost choked on my words because I always tell people that I think that that is a terrible reason to stay in a marriage, but I am doing just that.
There is nothing really wrong with my marriage, but there is nothing inherently good either. I dont get much from my husband in terms of the emotional side of marriage. He hardly talks to me, he never compliments me or tells me that he loves me (only if and when I say it first and sometimes when we are in bed together), he always has negative things to say, but never positive. He has never abused me in any way, but I still dont see why I am staying other than my husband is a great father, most of the time.
Is that really reason enough? Should I go through life being mostly miserable with my marriage and the man who is my husband just so that my daughter will always have her father nearby? I dont know if its worth it.
This tares me apart, so badly.
I am really lost