It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Down Syndrome Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 10-04-2006, 02:07 PM   #1
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Hamilton, Ontario
Posts: 2
NatD HB User
Question pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Hi,
My name is Natalie. I am 23 and pregnant with a ds baby. I know test results are never 100% but I am looking for realistic information on what my child and my family life may be like. Everyone around me seems to be sugarcoating it all. I would appreciate the truth right now

 
Old 10-05-2006, 05:02 PM   #2
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: San Antonio, Texas
Posts: 5
Lily's mom HB User
Wink Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

NatD
I was in the same place you were last year. I was devestated by the news that my unborn child had down syndrome. I cried for at least two months. I'm now typing this to you with a 6 mo old pulling at the keyboard. She is beautiful and has brought us joy. I still h ave an occasional sad moment, but mostly we are just happy. Know that it will get better. I couldn't love her any more if she was a "normal" baby. I met with some ladies from my local down syndrome association whe I was pregnant and it helped. Take care, Libby

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 10-09-2006, 03:00 PM   #3
Inactive
(male)
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Br
Posts: 224
brazilman HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Quote:
Originally Posted by NatD
Hi,
My name is Natalie. I am 23 and pregnant with a ds baby. I know test results are never 100% but I am looking for realistic information on what my child and my family life may be like. Everyone around me seems to be sugarcoating it all. I would appreciate the truth right now
Hi Natalie:

I don't have ds kids, so I don't know exactly what having a ds kid is like. However, I can tell you in the first place that having a kid and bringing him or her up, whether ds or not, is not an easy task at all. I presume that a ds kid will require, strictly speaking, more time and attention, but I hear that the parents of a ds kid donot complain about the additional charge and since it can be a challenge for them to educate their child, often will they experience a greater reward in their beautiful task than the parents of a "normal" kid. Ds kids are usually said to be a lot more affectionate and sensitive.

If your kid has ds, you can first of all look at this as a larger experience of life for you: be sure that you won't emerge from it as the same person you were in the beginning. I am sure you will be a better and more mature and compassionate person, even if at times you may revolt and ask: "why me?"

I hope your husband and family can give you the necessary physical and emotional support. For you may occasionally meet with ignorant and prejudiced people.

It is very very important for you to have a healthy pregnancy: eat well, eat fish, seafood, nuts. Stop with all junk food. What you eat now will help to shape the body and mind of your child. Avoid ultrasound, x-rays, tobacco, alcohol. Join, if possible, a group of pregnant women and share your thoughts and fears with them. Prepare yourself for a normal birth, if possible homebirth, so that this will be a first stimulation for your kid. Stay away as much as possible from the cold atmosphere of hospitals. Let your child sense and know that he/she came into this world desired just the way he/she is. Breastfeed your child. This will further help his/her mental and physical development. Love your child, but don't let your love stifle him/her either, but rather let it unfold like encouragement.

Sunshine, walks through the woods, seabathing, shantala (massage for infants), flower essence or seaweed baths, homeopathy, Mental Clarity (Google for New Chapter site - Mental Clarity is natural formula made from wild mushrooms), etc - all of these are resources for you to develop your kid's mental and physical abilities.

This is not a perfect world. Or maybe I should say: in the world there is room for all kinds of people. And if your kid was given the opportunity to be born, he or she has the right to be here.

Best to you and your kid.

JC

 
Old 10-09-2006, 09:23 PM   #4
Junior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: so. california
Posts: 29
momtofour HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Quote:
It is very very important for you to have a healthy pregnancy: eat well, eat fish, seafood, nuts. Stop with all junk food. What you eat now will help to shape the body and mind of your child. Avoid ultrasound, x-rays, tobacco, alcohol. Join, if possible, a group of pregnant women and share your thoughts and fears with them. Prepare yourself for a normal birth, if possible homebirth, so that this will be a first stimulation for your kid. Stay away as much as possible from the cold atmosphere of hospitals. Let your child sense and know that he/she came into this world desired just the way he/she is. Breastfeed your child. This will further help his/her mental and physical development.
Although it is important to be in the best emotional and physical shape possible while pregnant.. I hope nobody thinks it is anything we do that causes ds. PLEASE talk to you dr. before attempting a homebirth, as many of our babies need extra care. Heart, breathing and other issues present themselves at birth and our little ones need to be watched carefully in the first few hours of life. I think homebirths are wonderful, but not recommended for any high risk pregnancy.

 
Old 10-10-2006, 01:53 AM   #5
Inactive
(male)
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Br
Posts: 224
brazilman HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Quote:
Originally Posted by momtofour
Although it is important to be in the best emotional and physical shape possible while pregnant.. I hope nobody thinks it is anything we do that causes ds. PLEASE talk to you dr. before attempting a homebirth, as many of our babies need extra care. Heart, breathing and other issues present themselves at birth and our little ones need to be watched carefully in the first few hours of life. I think homebirths are wonderful, but not recommended for any high risk pregnancy.
Hi momtofour:

Thanks for expanding this. You know better than I.

I know that ds is not anything that we parents may have done - it is a contingency, so to say. But I also think that through a series of measures you can mitigate some of the "problems" associated with ds. And, in my opinion, good nutrition comes first.

As for a homebirth, yes, she has to prepare herself and in particular find a doctor who is friendly to the idea. This may be a little difficult, since most doctors seem to be afraid of it. If Natalie goes to hospital, she should try to have the most humane birth possible, and this includes holding her baby as soon as it is born and keeping it on her side, if possible.

JC

 
Old 10-26-2006, 10:31 AM   #6
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Hamilton, Ontario
Posts: 2
NatD HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Thank you for your reply and input. I'm not sure I'm comfortable with a home birth considering the high risk of the birth. I do welcome any and all input from others. I am the type of person who doesn't like surprises and I like to know exactly what I'm getting into. I understand that my life will be full of surprises whether I like it or not from now on But the more knowledge I have, the better I will feel.

Thank you

Natalie

 
Old 10-27-2006, 07:53 PM   #7
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: lakewood, nj us
Posts: 1
jaymee's mom HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

hi there, i have a 3yr old daughter with downs and i treat her like i do with her older siblings. she has been the joy of all of our lives and if i had to do it all over again, i wouldn't change a thing. the only that is different in my situation was that she was alot slower than my other children and i wasn't in a rush. today she goes to a special preschool and she is all over the place and she is so into elmo these days. if you need anymore advice please let me know. just keep the FAITH!!!

Last edited by moderator2; 10-27-2006 at 08:10 PM.

 
Old 10-28-2006, 02:56 AM   #8
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: ca
Posts: 2
myheart HB User
Smile Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Natalie,
I have a son with Down Syndrome, he is currently 7 yrs of age.
What's it like having a child with down syndrome? For me it has been wonderful, it has been joyful, it has been educating. I am an optimist, so when the geneticisits gave me their worst case scenerios, I listened...but I did not take anything that they said to heart. We are all different and so are our children. My son is in a public school, he attends special education part of the day and 1st grade the rest of the day. He is currently reading family words, basic adding, knows all his shapes , colors, can count to 30 on his own,(further with asst.) the list goes on and on. Our children can learn, they can listen, follow directions...the difference is, it takes them longer to learn. What has worked for us is, I have made everyday, every experience a learning experience. My son has been the absolute joy of our lives. He is a complete blessing and I thank God everyday for him!!!


Having a child with Down Syndrome is not a tragedy, it can really be a blessing!
__________________
Many Blessings,
Myheart

 
Old 10-28-2006, 07:42 AM   #9
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: tampa florida
Posts: 3
vad246 HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Hi, I have a downs syndrome brother. He is 49 years old. He has a intellectual knowlege of a 9 year old. Growing up with him, my mom always told us that he was special and we should always take care of him and give him extra love. That was what we alway did and still do. Since he was 7 years old, he has gone to a special school, until he was 18. Then he was sent to an adult school. After awhile, he was transfered to a Work Center,where he makes like 1 dollar an hour putting together screws for assembly, or etc.(The money is not our concern, we just want him to be with other people that are just like him, that he is comfortable with.) My brother loves wrestling and watching the news on tv. He always lets us know when the weather will be bad, or the scores of a football game. He is very smart in his own way. One time, my older brother wanted him to go to sleep at 8 pm, and not watch tv. So he put a device on the tv to make the tv turn off at 7 pm. Well my brother with downs , he just took the device off the tv and continued watching it. Hahahaha. He is a very happy person, he does everything for himself, except cook. We had to put my mom in a nursing home a year ago, so now my brother lives with my sister. . My mom showed us back then that he was special, and he definently is.
There are lots of state help. You should be checking into what is available. If you do have a downs syndrome child, then you will want to put him on a waiting list for school. Sometimes it takes years to get them active on the list. thats the only sad part. My brother has been in the system for so long, he gets anything that is available to him. My brother is a real blessing, and I love him a lot.

 
Old 10-28-2006, 03:04 PM   #10
Facilitator
(female)
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 15,033
Titchou HB UserTitchou HB UserTitchou HB UserTitchou HB UserTitchou HB UserTitchou HB UserTitchou HB UserTitchou HB UserTitchou HB UserTitchou HB UserTitchou HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

While I haven't had a DS child, my uncle (father's younger brother) was and they lived next door to us when we were all growing up (he was only 4 years older than me). He was truly a blessing to all of us! I just love these kids. They are so very special. It is more work as you have to locate services, etc for them more than with a child w/o DS but what you get back is more than worth it. They are very loving and almost always have a smile on their faces. WE'll be praying for you!

 
Old 10-29-2006, 04:48 AM   #11
Junior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Penn Yan, NY, USA
Posts: 22
Jensmom HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Hi:

My daughter Jennifer is 25 years old, I also have 2 other children, both younger. Raising Jennifer has been wonderful, challenging, exciting and disappointing, much like raising my other two!

A few suggestions for you. Look now for early intervention help for your child. Once he/she is born, you will be busy with new mommy things. It is vitally important that you have this lined up so you can get your child child help from the get go. Jennifer had her first therapy - in our home - when she was just 2 weeks old. They gave us exercises to do to increase her muscle tone, which is low in almost all of our children. The therapist also was there to answer questions specific to our children such as feeding issues, sleep, positioning, etc.

Jennifer is indeed the light of our lives, as are our boys. She brings all of us great joy and has taught us all much about life, love, and perserverance. She gives 110% every day. I wish you the best, please know we are here to answer questions, offer support and enjoy the special moments with you.

Sarah

 
Old 10-29-2006, 04:59 AM   #12
Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: NY state
Posts: 63
hannahph HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Hello and congratulations! My daughter hannah is eight years old. You are asking for a realistic view of life with a child with DS. I think everyone wants to automatically say it is wonderful to make you feel better and it truly is, I thank God evry day for my daughter and can not imagine life without her.Is it always easy, no. Thats the realistic part. I do think the first couple of years are the hardest.My daughter had heart issues and heart surgery at seven weeks old. Frequently our kiddos have some health issues and it takes some adjustment to get used to all that-but you do(and some kids have no issues too)Then there is the therapies. You will have a million people evaluating your little one all the time and then people in your house all the time providing thearpies to keep your little one on track.This can get old real quick.Then you also have to deal with your own feelings about having a child with DS. Don't be afraid or ashamed of your feelings. Allow yourself time to grieve for the child that you thought you would have.If you can find a copy of the poem "Welcome to Holland" you should read it. You can maybe do a google search for it. I have found that some people really benefit from a support group-and there are a lot of them out there.You may think that your life will never be the same again-it won't. BUT you will adjust to your new life and you will wonder what the big deal was. My life is different now, but I would not change a thing. I consider my life to be normal. I have two kids who I love more than anything. We do normal family things. We have a great group of friends and a social life.Things are going to be ok. It does take time to adjust to it all.I do predict that as soon as your little one is born you will fall in love and it will be ok.DS is not such a horrible thing that it was years ago. Most people are much more accepting of our kids, and there are many more oppertunities for them and medical advances. Oh one more thing, don't read anything on DS over 10 years old, it is sure to be horribly outdated and will scare you.Plus all the books you read will give you the worst case senario and it will make you crazy. Please realize it will be ok. You are entering a world you never new existed and you will come away from it a better person. It is going to be ok.

 
Old 10-30-2006, 04:29 PM   #13
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: ca
Posts: 2
myheart HB User
Talking Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

[QUOTE=hannahph](and some kids have no issues too)[QOUTE=hannahph]

My son has been one of the blessed ones, with no serious health issues. He does have a low immune system, the only downfall with this condition is, if you sneeze a mile away and you have a cold he will catch it....lol!

Like jensmom posted,it is so important that your child have early intervention. It may be overwhelming in the begining, but it is so important!.... I now look forward to therapy sessions. My son is known in the therapy community and everyone lights up when they see him,.. he is so loved, in return I light up just seeing how much joy and love my son gives to others.



Many Blessings,
Myheart
__________________
Many Blessings,
Myheart

 
Old 11-03-2006, 08:19 PM   #14
Junior Member
(male)
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 19
CowboyCarpenter HB User
Re: pregnant with ds baby..in need of a realistic view

Hi Natile,
I am a mother of five. My last baby was born with down syndrome, but I did not know until she was born. The only thing I was afraid of was that she had the heart defect. When I finally found out she didn't have the heart defect I thanked God for a very healthy baby. They are a very prescious gift from God. My daughter is 18 months and is just like normal babies at this age. Yes, you will have difficult times, but it is rewarding. I think you will do great.
God bless

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Ex is pregnant but not sure where I fit in NEWABQ Relationship Health 23 06-04-2009 04:16 PM
I want to get pregnant just_a_gurl_010 Pregnancy-Teen 7 09-07-2006 08:56 AM
the Baby Channel on tv myloathe Infant Care (up to 18 months old) 14 07-26-2006 09:19 AM
Thanks Eve, starting new thread, bad night, need my wool steeled... Hiya Relationship Health 138 05-11-2006 09:28 AM
copaxone use while pregnant?? locket Multiple Sclerosis 2 03-10-2006 11:32 AM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Karen W. (2), Kay3282 (2), kanded (2), Clyde1 (2), mehoo (1), BrendaW1966 (1), RIGHTB4MYEYES (1), virtuallyemily (1), JUDY1954 (1), Karren26 (1)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1180), MSJayhawk (1004), Apollo123 (905), Titchou (848), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (759), ladybud (754), midwest1 (669), sammy64 (668), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:18 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!