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Old 09-18-2007, 02:45 PM   #1
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sandygriffin74 HB User
new aggressive behavior im at a loss

i have a 12 year old son that has become very aggressive in the last 3 weeks. he wont go to school or church and if we try to make him then he starts hitting and kicking . he is very strong and i am afraid that someone may get hurt. as long as he gets to stay in side the house and no one tries to get to close to him then he is fine but if we go near him then he is likely to hit kick slap pinch or pull our glasses off. i dont know what has changed or happened to make my normally sweet son into what ever this is. any ideas on how to help? oh we have already tried mental health possibilities and they tell us he is too low functioning to help and they wont offer any other suggestion except residential care . im not ready to gitve up my son i really want to help him get over what is bothering him.

 
Old 09-23-2007, 03:37 PM   #2
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Karen W. HB User
Re: new aggressive behavior im at a loss

Hi,
Can I ask you, did he attend school at all this fall? We had so many problems with the school system once he was in middle school and high school, it brought out the worst in him, some thing had to trigger this, the question is what??
Karen

 
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Old 09-23-2007, 08:44 PM   #3
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sandygriffin74 HB User
Re: new aggressive behavior im at a loss

he did go for a while but has been out for most of the last 3 weeks because of his behavior. he is attending our local state school because the public schools kicked him out last year in april. his behavior at that ime was normal but the teachers did'nt want to work with him because he is still in diapers. his teachers at the new school don't seem to know any more than i do about what is wrong. he won't go any where not even to mc donalds. we took him to the doctor friday and after the fighting to get him in the car he seemed fine we got to the office and he played and laughed like normal until the nurse called his name then he hit her twice. now they are wanting to put him in the hospital for evaluation to get him on meds for controlling him. i would like to figure out the problem instead of drugging him because this is just not my bob and i want my son back. i have also been told that this could just be puberty and maybe part of it is but i can't believe that all of it is because he's 12. thank you for your reply i hope you have more ideas than i do every thing that happens with him is new for me. i've never had a boy before much less one with special needs.

 
Old 09-27-2007, 09:38 PM   #4
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Karen W. HB User
Re: new aggressive behavior im at a loss

Hi,
I have thought about your last post for a few days now and you know what, I think I would have him put in the hospital, that way they can get to the bottom of this and find out what is wrong and hopefully when all is said and done, you will have your son back. When a child with DS starts going threw puberlty it's hard. We went threw allot with my son David, he had aggressive behavior at times, I can remember this one time we told him it was time to go to bed, he got mad and tore off his PJ top like Hulk Hogan, He would also get mad and break things, allot of the time when he was done, he would just break down and cry. I did talk to his Doctor about his behavior, she had said there is medication for out burst's like that but his were not on a daily basis, it was more of a now and then type of thing, so he did not qualify. David is now 21 and those moments are all gone and he is a real sweet heart and he's really funny.
Karen

 
Old 09-27-2007, 11:17 PM   #5
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sandygriffin74 HB User
Re: new aggressive behavior im at a loss

thank you for responding. he has taken to breaking things unfortunately it was my nose. he punched me yesterday and then pushed my head into the counter top so now i have a broken nose and a cuncussion. we have spent days looking for a hospital and there doesn't seem to be one in all of missouri that will take him. most have iq cut off's and won't take anyone with an iq of less than 70. we tried to do respite for a few days and the regional center was going to transport him but they got here today and after a 15 minute fight to get him in the carhe started hitting the woman driving and they said they couldn't take him like that so he is still here and now he has figured out that he gets his way by hitting. i know that respite isn't the answer but we were hoping that maybe it would give me a break. his behavior isn't consistent only when we get to close and he doesn't want us to. or if we try to make him leave the house. as long as he is at home and we aren't trying to change his diaper then he is his happy loving self. even after he hit me yesterday he felt bad and was very attentive trying to make it up to me. he must have said he was sorry 100 times. something is wrong and he can't tell me what. i wish i could read his mind or magically teach him to talk. anyway we are going to start looking for a hospital out of state tomorrow. someone somewhere has to be able to help us. i love my son but i can't go through the next 3 years like this. assuming that it is puberty and he will grow out of it. thank you for posting you have no idea how much of a relief it is just to know that someone else has been here. every one tells me that downs kids are always so happy and loving and mostly he is but i have been feeling like i've done something wrong for him to be acting like this. i spend most days stressed and crying because i have no idea how to help him and i know this is very hard for him too. there is no one else in our area that has a child with downs and i am very isolated most of the time. just talking with someone else that has been in my situation has been a huge help. again thank you.

 
Old 09-30-2007, 08:30 AM   #6
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Karen W. HB User
Re: new aggressive behavior im at a loss

Hi ,
Oh I'm so sorry he broke your nose, you must be soooo upset, I know you thought that it would have never come to this point. If it makes you feel any better, When my son was around 13, he flipped me in the kitchen just like they do are wrestling, He was mad and you know how strong they get when they get mad. I would personally call your doctor and demad he be put on some type of medication to keep him calm until you find someone to help you. I was always afraid that if my son hurt someone they would take him away, Like I said, he did go threw a very tough puberity stage, he could not handle his emotions very well and it was very worry some for My husband and my self, I know what your going threw, Hang in there.
Karen

 
Old 10-01-2007, 08:30 PM   #7
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Karen W. HB User
Re: new aggressive behavior im at a loss

Hi,
One more thing, I'm sure there is a Childrens Hospital in your state, they are the ones who can help you, find out where it's located and set up an appointment, I would call and talk to someone who can help you on what kind of Doctor to see, if anyone has the answers to your childs problem, it would be them.
Karen

 
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