Confused and Scared - Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board

Panda176 · 02-11-2004, 10:16 PM

Hi Everyone,
I'm somewhat new to these boards, so I really don't know exactly how they work. Anyways, the real reason that I am writing, well I don't know why I'm writing, other than I'm kind of scared. I believe that I have always struggled with weight and eating issues, however this time I think it's getting kind of bad. I find that I'm always thinking about food. Thinking usually helps me to not eat it. My close friends have said something to me about it, and I talk to them when they ask, but I try to keep everything to myself. I'm obsessed with how I look, and it bothers me that I don't feel in control of everything, including my weight. I've gotten into a routine where I exercise as much as I possibly can. I have seen some of my friends go though eating disorders, and I saw how painful it was for them, so my mind is telling me to stop, but I can't. On days like tonight, where I ate a ton and didn't exercise I feel horrible and I'm thinking of ways to not eat tomorrow. I don't know what to do, and I feel alone in this. Please help me, thank you

notorious b · 02-12-2004, 12:52 PM

i know EXACTLY what you're going through... i've been feeling like you are for the past 2 and a half years. i think about my weight like at least once every 5 minutes, if not more... and that is NOT an exaggeration. every chance i get, i look in the mirror to see if i look any skinnier than i did earlier.

i think about food constantly. it REALLY ****es me off when i think about it WHILE i'm working out... i mean, what good does that do?? it's hard not to think about food. especially at work where people are always snacking or have candy/chocolate sitting on their desks... i don't really ever eat it, but i sit here and listen to them eat it or see it and want it. it's a constant struggle and it's not fun at all!!

when i was reading your post, i felt like i could have been writing it myself.

we are all here for you if you should need anything... support, advice, or just to listen. i think it is always helpful just to get it out there and tell SOMEONE.

let me know how you're doing.