I'm not sure what to title this - Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board

LooksLikeRain · 09-06-2004, 09:42 PM

Well I have been fighting anorexia for a few months now but recently I've decided to try to start recovering. There is a new plan by weight watchers called "The Core Plan". It's kind of like atkins but you can eat other things too, like wheat pasta. It's more like The South Beach Diet I guess. Well I've been on this diet since ... yesterday, lol. And it makes me sick to eat all that food. This morning I was at my friend's house and we were making breakfast (eggs and sausage, because you can eat that on this diet). I did ok while we were making eggs but during the time we were making sausage I started getting dizzy, and started to feel nauseated. I'm not sure exactly WHY this was, I'm thinking it was because I was overwhelmed by all the grease, and I still have the side effects of anorexia. I really do not want to eat. If I lose more in a week on this diet that I am on, I might stay on it, But if I lose more by not eating I'll probably continue to... starve myself. I feel better about myself when I don't eat as much. Do you think I will gain weight by eating all of this protein when I had not been eating barely anything before. I liked how I could control how much I put into my body, and how I could control the calories. I'm not sure what I should do. I can't WAIT until Friday when I weigh to see if this diet worked. I'll probably have a really low self esteem this week. The only thing I really like about the diet I'm on right now is that I don't feel like I am going to wake up really weak, or not wake up at all. That is what scares me the most, you know? Well I don't want to take up all of your time, So I will leave my post at this. I also have one more question, Do anorexics usually lose muscle before fat? Or water before fat? Thanks for everthing!

--Chelsea

AvA_AdOrE · 09-07-2004, 06:29 AM

hey hunny
um, i'm not sure what the diet will do to you...it's low carb right? carbs are what give to the energy for you to move and live day to day, and make ur brain and stuff work...i guess if u were eating nothing then the diet might be better than nothing, but after not eating much and then starting a diet with sausages which have high fat conent i dont think that would be very good for you. i think it might be better to start your diet with whole grain bread and fruit and vegies, just a little at a time. i think
good luck xxx
AvA

juicy*lucy · 09-07-2004, 06:31 AM

Hey Chelsea

I'm so proud of you to be considering recovery, that is a huge step! Although from what you've said in your post, are you really trying this diet as a means to aid recovery? Or as a means to aid weight loss? I think if you really want to start recovery you need to come up with an eating plan that you really feel comfortable with rather than something that makes you feel sick and want to not eat. That is not what recovery is about. Are you seeing a therapist or dietician? If so, perhaps they could help you to put together an eating plan to gradually build up your calorie intake. When I first began recovery I was on one small meal a day to begin with, and I built it up from there. It takes a while for your stomach to adjust to being fed again.

I hope that recovery really is what you want. Imagine being free from all this pain and unhappiness, imagine being able to see yourself for who you really are, not for who ana thinks you are. Imagine looking in the mirror and seeing a beautiful, healthly body. 'In my head the flesh seems thicker' but this is just ana talking. You CAN be free from her.

Please re-think the diet you've started. It doesn't sound as though it's right for you and I don't want it to make you regress into anorexia.

Take care

xxx J*L xxx

LooksLikeRain · 09-07-2004, 06:48 PM

it's not really eating fatty sausages, it has to be lean meat. sort of a protein thing. you can eat wheat pasta and whole grain cereals with skim milk. i really do not like this diet, it's so hard. the only good thing about it is i get to eat beef jerkey.. lol. once i started this diet i got sick though. i thought maybe i'd have less of a chance of getting sick if i started eating more again. i'm weighing friday and i'm counting down the days to see if i lost any weight. it is more of a diet thing, but i don't want to have anorexia anymore. i'm really tired of only seeing fat in the mirror. i know for sure it is more of a mind thing now. after friday if i have not lost as much weight as i usually would i'll go back to what i used to do. this sounds odd but at least i get to eat some of what i want. just not much. this is so difficult, i feel like i need to go weigh myself now, but i only do it once a week. i've realized this is more of a disordered thinking disease. well i'm going to go now, thanks for the support, i'll update and tell yall what happens.

ohiobabe43 · 09-07-2004, 08:40 PM

heyy...reading what you said made me sad. anorexia is a hard thing to deal with i can imagine even tho im bulemic...its hard saying that..do you really want to be this way?? i dont think anyone does maybe u should consider help... its good to eat thats why i am bulemic and not anorexic i like to eat but i dont want to gain weight. try eating but not unhealthy foods..maybe u will feel better about yourself if you dont eat junk food i know that helps me..there is help for you and im sure with all the support you get from here it will help you everyday. i just hope you are ok and try to recover