mom joining weight watchers [again] - Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board

mandabear · 05-19-2005, 12:06 AM

I talked with my mother on the phone last night, she told me about her plans to join weight watchers. This is probably the 1,000th time she's joined. Always losing weight and gaining it back. She's not even overweight, maybe in the low range at her highest weight. This is so frustrating to me. Why can't our whole family just adapt a healthier eating lifestyle? Instead of going out to eat every week or ordering a pizza once a week, why can't we stay at home and cook a meal that is good for you? I really just want to scream. I realize that its important to treat yourself to dessert and things now and then, but it's really hard to recover from an ED when your mom buys oreos, chocolate chip cookies, ice cream, and all those little debbie treats. And then goes on to complain about how she "shouldn't have eaten that" and "will start again tomorrow."

It is also frustrating how her and other people make exercise such a big deal. Shouldn't it be something you want to do in order to be healthy? And not look at it as something to get "tiny waist" or as something you dread doing?

My family has pointed out in the past when I've eaten too much, and they give me the "what? you're eating again?" look. There have been days when they've done that to me when I hadn't eaten all day. I know they don't mean to, but why don't they realize what they're putting me though? How am I supposed to create a positive relationship with food if most of the food around me in my house is junk food and the healthy food is bought only because my mom is on a diet? It's like, I know the calorie content of almost everything and the WW point value. I am just so frustrated. Is it wrong for me to ask my mom not to buy some of this stuff when I tell her about my ED? Even if I don't eat it, being around it drives me crazy. Not only would it help me, but I don't really think my family needs all of that junk food. Even if you're thin, eating oreos, whole fat milk, and little debbie cakes, isn't good for you. So it could help them as well. How do I explain this to her/them?

gerber_dazy · 06-01-2005, 10:34 AM

I don't think it would be fair for your family to not have what they want to eat because you can't eat it. It sounds to me that you want people to accomodate you because of your eating disorder. Losing weight is not that simple........if it was most of america would not be fat. We all need to eat in moderation. Your mom has the right to eat what she wants even if she does complain afterwards. She is old enough to know what is and isn't good for her. I have also suffered from an eating disorder and have recovered from it. I was in/out of the hospital 3 times in 6 months so I can totally relate to the way you feel. It is a constant daily struggle for me to not eat the foods I shouldn't. I don't feel it would be fair to my family to not let them have an occasional treat because "i can't have it". Hang in there and try to concentrate on yourself instead of your mom.

tired and angry · 06-02-2005, 04:04 PM

Hey,

I totally understand where u are coming from. That is almost exactly the same as the situation in my house. Plus im at uni at the mo n my friends have just started weight watchers n have got the scales out etc coz our ball is comin up. It really puts me off eating in hall wen they tell me how many points it is first but yeh we dont have the right to stop em, just have to deal with it.