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Old 03-20-2006, 06:54 PM   #1
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Quirk HB User
Arrow do my habits sound like something to worry about???

i've always wondered if i have a real problem, but i've always felt and mostly looked healthy- ocassionally people tell me i'm too thin, but i seriously don't understand why, because i think i look normal and most of my friends tell me that i look healthy. i'm 5'5" and 115-120 (depends on the week!) so that's pretty healthy. i go to the gym when i can because i love being active, and my biggest weaknesses are ice cream, cake, and cookies- i have at least one of the 3 every day (!) along with full meals and little snacks.

my thing is that i ALWAYS think about food and my weight and my body. i have since i was young, and i've always had a problem with my weight (but i've been the same height & weight for years!) i've never been anorexic, though i used to try to control what i ate and counted every calorie... i just love food too much! i also used to try purging, but throwing up just isn't fun, so that never worked... so i've never had a REAL problem so to speak, but i feel like i'm a freak for thinking so much about my body.

is this normal??? i feel like a very happy and healthy person, and i do realize that i am a skinny girl, but i just wish i didn't think so much about my next meal, and then feel bad when i eat crap. maybe it's just my hormones putting me in a bad mood. i'm not really worried about my situation, i guess i just want to talk about it to see what other people think about my situation, because maybe my perspective isn't as clear as i think it is. thanks!

 
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Old 03-20-2006, 07:10 PM   #2
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Lexi4529 HB User
Re: do my habits sound like something to worry about???

Quote:
my thing is that i ALWAYS think about food and my weight and my body.....is this normal??? .... i do realize that i am a skinny girl, but i just wish i didn't think so much about my next meal, and then feel bad when i eat crap.

It's a disease; it's called "being female in America".
It's society's disease, though, not yours.
You feeling like crap is simply a symptom of the fact that our society suffers from a disease.
The disease is that it hates women, and wants us all to starve to death.
There may be a cure, but I haven't found it yet, and I'm practically middle-aged.

 
Old 03-21-2006, 05:54 AM   #3
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zusanna HB User
Re: do my habits sound like something to worry about???

You sound so much like me!! Although at one time I was way too thin. I'm now at a healthy weight but I'm like you. I ALWAYS think about food, my weight, and my body. My biggest fear is getting fat. But like you also, I love food, especially sweets like ice cream, cookies, and chocolate. I also have those things at least once a day, sometimes more. I count cals obsessively too. I don't exercise much but I feel guilty that I don't. I walk ALOT when the weather is nice but I can't right now where I live because there is like I a foot of snow on the ground (damn snow, lol). You're not alone. And this is an eating disorder. I was diagnosed with ED-NOS (eating disorder not otherwise specified). That basically means your relationship with food and eating is not healthy but you don't exactly fit the criteria of being anorexic or bulimic. I'm trying to overcome this through intuitive eating. Intuitive eating is basically eating when you're hungry, what you're hungry for, and until you're comfortably full. But if you're accustomed to dieting or have had an ED it's really hard. There are many good books out there about intuitive eating and I've also just joined a web community called Diet Survivors on Yahoo. I've realized the only way to ever overcome this and be a normal eater again is to basically relearn how to eat. We are born intuitive eaters, but because of the stupid society that we live in that is completely obsessed with dieting and body image we lose touch with out inner eating cues and instead eat according to how society says we should eat. Eating should be pleasurable and guilt-free. That is what it is meant to be like. We should be able to have cookies an ice cream without a bit of guilt, but in the world we live in cookies are ice cream are "bad" or "forbidden". This is what makes us feel so guilty. We just have to learn to block out society's messages about food, eating, and body image. Anyway, I would highly recommend looking into intuitive eating. It has helped me alot, even though I still have a long way to go. Good luck and take care!

 
Old 03-27-2006, 04:17 PM   #4
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Re: do my habits sound like something to worry about???

It is so enlightening to hear another's story that sounds just like mine. Like you, I have maintained a normal ideal body weight for years. There was a time early in my college that I gained the "freshman fifteen" and learned about fitness and nutrition to successfully lose weight. Unfortunately, I learned so much that I almost feel imprisoned by food and body image. I sometimes feel that I suffer as much as an overweight person. A day has not gone by in my life for the last 10 years that I have not added in my head how many calories I've eaten. I wake up every day and tell myself that I will not count today, but by noon I begin to feel anxious. I'm more scared of gaining weight than dying of a terrible disease. But more than I want to be "skinny", I want to feel "normal" around my friends, family and co-workers. So I eat like everyone else does around me. And the fact I love food!! There have been days that I "punish" myself by skipping dinner because I ate too much at lunch or avoided hanging out with friends if I knew food would be there. But for the most part, I eat like anyone else. I am now in my late 20's and thinking about planning a family. It scares me to think I could bring a daughter in this world who would feel the way I do about my body, my weight and my food intake. Did you seek professional counseling to learn about this new way of thinking about food?

 
Old 04-15-2006, 06:34 PM   #5
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bluerus HB User
Re: do my habits sound like something to worry about???

Wow, this sounds almost like me. I am not too picky about food and i will eat it but i do count the calories i eat. If i do have an eating disorder, which i hope i dont then i will gladly try to fix it. How do you know for sure that you have one? Or i have one i guess for that matter?

 
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