Home from inpatient treatment - Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board

cryingskies · 05-08-2006, 09:33 PM

Hey, I dont know if those of you who I used to talk to a lot are still around this board. But I just got home from inpatient treatment in phila******a Pa.... and for once I actually feel really good. I have energy and im not so depressed. I have my bad days but over all I feel much more like the "real" me, someone I haven't been for the past 6 years since I let my eating disorder run wild with me. I thought i would die before I made it through treatment, but now I feel as though I would have died without it, and I know im right. When I got to the Eating disorders unit I practically collapsed, and ended up being taken out 911 to a near by hospital. and I dont remember anything from the first week I was in treatment. But now as time has gone by, I feel so much better and I'm so glad that I went, I dont know if I would still be alive today had I not found the courage to call and get set up to sign myself in. Now I just struggle with the hard part of keeping up with my Meal plan and watching that I dont do too much the first few months, I'm not allowed to go back to work for another month, so I dont know what to do with all of the time I have on my hands....any suggestions......I was in the dark side of the tunnel and i thought there wasnt a single ray of hope, but now that I've come out the other side, the sun is shining so brightly and I can feel the life back in me. I feel like "myself" again.....all u girls keep the hope and if you really wanna do this and u really wanna get better just take it one meal at a time, one bite at a time.....and give urself credit for every single little thing that you do.....because no matter how small or insignifigant u may think it is, it is still an accomplishment and give urself credit for it, if u mess up with one meal, or skip it or whatever else, its just one meal, pull it together and try to make it thru the next, just no matter what dont stop trying, because it can happen, it just matters how bad u want it.

Peace and Love
Chrissy

texascowgirl8 · 05-08-2006, 10:06 PM

wow... let me just say- thanks so much for posting that. i was just told that i need to go ip and im very hesitant.... after reading that i know its whats best. im SO glad to hear how things have changed and how much more of yourself you are.... thanks for the inspiration to move forward with recovery...

Anterrabae · 05-09-2006, 06:44 AM

I'm so proud of you. It takes so much courage to go into treatment and I'm glad you feel so much better now that you're out. Definitely write down all the good stuff that you're feeling now so that on days when the ED is looking tempting, you can look back on what you wrote and remember that you feel so much better when you're not acting on the ED. Thanks so much for sharing your experience with us, I think you'll inspire a lot of people who are afraid of treatment. Keep fighting!

cryingskies · 05-09-2006, 10:13 AM

thanks....I think its a really big choice to choose to go inpatient, no one really wants to do it, but it is worth it, please stay strong babe and u can do this....

Thanks anterrabae....I will do that, before I left treatment one of the psych techs and I sat down and made a list of my possible stumbling blocks, and a list of healthy alternatives and why they are healthy, and then how I can be accountable for that situation, so thats been helpful, and i've been journaling a lot, so its pretty amazing to look back at the beginning of my journey and see where I am now. Hopefully I can stay strong and continue on the right track.....how are you doing?

peace and love
chrissy

Jonistyle4 · 05-09-2006, 10:17 AM

cryingskies, HUGE congratulations from me! i know how hard you were struggling and it's so inspiring and wonderful to hear that you're doing and feeling better. i know it's still a tough struggle, but it makes me really happy to hear how far you've made it. in terms of "killing time" before you can go back to work, what about taking up some projects? sewing, painting, knitting, redecorating -- does any of that interest you at all? reading is always a great time killer in my opinion, so maybe stock up on some new books? another idea is learning to play an instrument. i'm actually trying to teach myself guitar right now (bought it used for only $50!) and although it's tough (lol!), it really takes up some time and gets me focusing on something other than food, weight, etc. music is really good for that, i think. anyway, just some ideas. keep doing great though, you've done amazing so far!