piscean, first of all, i want to remind you how personally proud i am of your progress. (lots of "p's" in that sentence, lol!) seriously though, i have SO much respect for how far you've come and how hard you're still fighting. and not counting calories? way to go, babe! seriously, you are doing REALLY well and are an inspiration for all of us.
this comparing thing is really tough and if it's any comfort, know that we ALL suffer from that problem. i don't know that i have any great advice cuz it REALLY bothers me too, but i think you just need to have confidence in yourself and your decisions. like, for example, there's one of those "naturally super skinny" (for real, i don't think she has an ed) girls at my work, but it REALLY bothers me cuz she hardly eats ANYTHING. seriously, everyday she'll have a packet of oatmeal for breakfast, a lean cuisine for lunch and maybe pretzels for a snack and THAT'S IT. that's like 600 calories tops! and here i am eating 3500 a day. i wrestle over and over with, "she gets to be skinny and hardly eat, why can't i???" but here's the thing -- first of all, i'm prettier than she is. so i remind myself of that. (lol) second of all, she's got a sit around all day, never do any healthy physical activity lifestyle. can anyone say LAME?!?! and finally, what am i comparing myself to??? do i honestly WANT to eat her measely little poo diet? heck no! i LOVE food and feeling nourished. i think lean cuisines taste like crap. and eating what she eats, i'd be miserable not only cuz it tastes like crap and is boring, but because i'd be STARVING. so i try to find the confidence in myself (easier said than done) to say "i want to eat this much. it makes me feel good, healthy and happy. and maybe she doesn't mind this "diet" to be skinny, but i CHOOSE not to do that."
does this make sense? i think it comes from an inner confidence that even though others are "dieting" and eating measely, untasty foods, YOU choose not to do that cuz A) you don't need to and B) you don't want to. everybody in my office (even 25-year old men!) eats lean cuisines all the time and it DOES make me self conscious about how much i eat for lunch (and breakfast and snacks and treats and ... sigh ... lol!) but then i have to step out of the situation and remind myself that what they're eating tastes LAME, what i'm eating tastes GOOD, AND it's healthier for me and better for my particular needs. hope this helps a little at least. just keep reminding yourself that you don't WANT to "be skinny" and all the ed-crap that comes along with that goal, you CHOOSE to be happy. good luck!