Hey, thanx for replying to my message, i dont want to get a new doctor cause they are just not helping, i am scared, and i am still losing weight, i am 16 and i fit in age 9-10 clothes, i have just found out that i have cancer, so i have that to worry about too.(thanx for the compliment about my writing james) Anyway i know i need help, but i just dont want it, i feel so fat and i just want to be really thin, i want to look like ally mcbeal so is soooo pretty. It all started because i relised that men like thin wowen, i egt alot of attention from men cause i am thin, my boyfriend tells me i am too thin and so does my best mates, but they are lying to make me feel better. Its not like i am not pretty but i am not thin enough, maybe if i keep starving myself i might end up dead, that might be the best idea i have had in a while, no-one would care if i did die, my mum and me don't get on, my dad doesn't want to know me, i cant talk to my brothers and sisters cause they hate me. they only people i have are my best friend and my boyfriend, my other best mate died of bulimia and anorexia and i feel that it is my fault i have to go now sorry this rambles on a bit love caz
Originally posted by CAZ: Hey, thanx for replying to my message, i dont want to get a new doctor cause they are just not helping, i am scared, and i am still losing weight, i am 16 and i fit in age 9-10 clothes, i have just found out that i have cancer, so i have that to worry about too.(thanx for the compliment about my writing james) Anyway i know i need help, but i just dont want it, i feel so fat and i just want to be really thin, i want to look like ally mcbeal so is soooo pretty. It all started because i relised that men like thin wowen, i egt alot of attention from men cause i am thin, my boyfriend tells me i am too thin and so does my best mates, but they are lying to make me feel better. Its not like i am not pretty but i am not thin enough, maybe if i keep starving myself i might end up dead, that might be the best idea i have had in a while, no-one would care if i did die, my mum and me don't get on, my dad doesn't want to know me, i cant talk to my brothers and sisters cause they hate me. they only people i have are my best friend and my boyfriend, my other best mate died of bulimia and anorexia and i feel that it is my fault i have to go now sorry this rambles on a bit love caz
Dear Caz
I sorry to here you have cancer that's awful I hope that you are all right. Thanks for wanting my email address I would love to hear from you. I tried to change my email and password at the same time and have temporarily zapped myself for the system. so I have re-registered This is my email address goldfish4210@lycos.co.uk.
I'm interested in your attitude to food because its so different from mine. For a long time I used to look at food as means to alter my mood or get comfort, never about weight, I've never had the slightest concern about it. What I hate is feeling addicted to sugar I mean really in the grip of a uncontrollable desire to eat. My aim is to be balanced in what I eat and to feel reasonably healthy, I don't like worrying about my health and the idea that I'm doing myself harm.
Anyway I'm interested how do you function without eating. I mean what do you run on batteries? What about "girlpower"? How are you surpposed to have that, when you are on the verge of fainting though trying not to eat? You mention that your friends are lying to you to make you feel better, yeah right! That really likely, after all, it could not possibly be that they have your best interests at heart.
In regards to your own size and weight, that is your choice and up to you to decide.
But you to be attractive what's the point in being so thin that you have no energy to be sexy. It takes effort to smile and be cheerful. If you haven't got any energy you might as well be a mannequin in some shop window and I don't see many men going out with mannequins.
Warmest regards James
PS I'm sorry if this sounds harsh its just the way it comes out sometimes, I really wish the very best though ;=)
hey james, i see food as something that i hate, i have a desire to be thin, i hate the way i am, and not meaning to sound harsh, but i have a totally different problem to you, you dont know how it feels to long to be dead and to feel as if food is your enemy, i hate being anorexic, but i like being thin, i have no desire to be "sexy" i have a boyfriend who means everything to me, although most guys cant handle a "paper thin" girlfriend or someone who looks like a "twig". my friends try but i dont believe them, one of my mates tells me i am anorexic but i dont think i am. i have to go now love always caz
Hi Caz
You are right in a way I don't no anything about anorexia, I heard the word of course. Thats why I find it refreshing to talk about, because its so different from comfort eating. I hope I don't annoy you too much with my lack of knowledge.
You know you say you want to be thin, It sounds to me that you are achieving you adjective really well.
You have chosen to be thin, and you are thin by the sound of things, so well done.
What don't you like about it though? Is it about not feeling healthy. Or Not being able to enjoy food.
Or is the biggest thing just feeling really really low, as you mentioned above.
This questions open to anyone else in a similar situation.
hey james, i see food as a enemey, i dont like this because i pass out alot through lack of nutrition and lack of anergy, i cant even go to the toilet without being puffed out, i self-harm as way to deal with this, anorexia is not just not eating, its the side affects too, the depression and hatred comes with it have to go repley soon love CAZ
RE:from caz 
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