Check your pills to see if they contain ephedra. Some all natural diet pills do and it is VERY dangerous. Taking more than the recommended dose has caused many deaths and it is being considered to be outlawed here in the US.
The reason that your mom yells and threatens you is that she is scared and that is the only way that she can think to possibly make you eat more. My mom would yell, threaten, and cry. She even slapped me once she was so upset.
Your mom doesn't know that the more she tries to control you and your weight the more that you want to lose weight fast. Try telling her how you feel first. Maybe tell her that you want to be closer to her and that you really do need her. Then later on, when you feel comfortable, you can tell her about your food habits.
I really don't know what to tell you. When I was anorexic school was aweful. People would make fun of the little vegetable meals I would eat and come right up to me and ask if I was anorexic (as if I was just going to say 'yeah, will you please help me to gain some weight' or something). The last thing that you need is to get into bulimia. You think it's a one time thing and it slowly makes your life worse and worse.
Just hold out faith that life will get better because it will. I PROMISE you. Don't give in to this, fight it all the way. You will come back here (hopefully
) and tell us how you never knew what real life was until you started recovery. It's true, it's like the world is your oyster.
Work to improve your thinking right now and realize that what you see of the world is not what it really is. You're feelings, although very real, are wrong. You also might have clinical depression. If so, medication might really help, which is another reason to try to work up the courage to tell a parent, so that they can get you real help. Therapy also does wonders even though at first it doesn't seem like it will.
Keep on going. You can make it. You CAN and WILL recover from this and you still have your whole life ahead or you!
I feel so trapped... 
Linear Mode
