Am I different? - Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board

melisa · 03-05-2002, 07:09 PM

I have had an on going issue about food for a long time. As a child my parents and doctors had to give me medicine to eat. As a teenager I developed a tendency to purposely not eat. I am 4'11 and have always been thin. But there was always a nagging feeling to control my weight. A few times I have lost significantlly. Once I was down to 85 pounds. This was due to excersing and starving for a while. But I always start eating again. I am now 24 years old and still the issue is there. I weigh 110 now, but I have had two children. I have been thinking of going on a diet because I'm the biggest I've ever been.Which isn't big at all. I just wondered if I am just like normal women or do I really have issues. It isn't the practices I do, it's that recurring notion I get.

cutenbrat · 03-06-2002, 01:13 PM

Melisa it sounds like you are treding on thin ice and if you don't watch your step you are going to fall in very soon if you already haven't. Society puts a lot of pressure on women and "weight" and how someone "should" look. In doing this society causes a lot of women to feel self conscious about their weight and in some cases I believe this triggers an eating disorder. You say you know you aren't over weight yet you feel over weight. What do you see when you look in the mirror? If it's not good is there a way to tell your mind, train your mind, to make it good? Please Melisa don't go on a diet; that's also how a lot of ED's are started. It sounds like you have issues with food and I can't digonsie an ED, but I can say that you are on dangerous territory hon. I have been fighting an ED for many years now and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy nor best friend. It's said to say that my best friend, yet worst enemy, has become my ED and my life revolved around "it". Please, consider what you are about to do or are doing and if you feel it's necessary get yourself into some counseling.

God Bless.

melisa · 03-06-2002, 01:53 PM

thank you cutenbrat for your help. i just don't really believe i have any kind of problem. i guess because this really don't consume my life. it just "shows up" every once in a while. most anorexics/bulimics can't stop, but i don't even have the self control to diet. so i just feel like i don't have a problem. but i just wonder why it keeps coming up. i don't really know what your going through, but i wish you the best