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Old 12-29-2002, 06:47 PM   #1
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Caitlyn C HB User
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Whats up with parents ... like i come home from college like heavier then leaving and my mom is all like u lost weight -- she's on diets and extremely unsuccessful i feel like she's mad if she thinks i lose weight -- so she gets all stupid with me cuz i used to have an ed - -- then she also says mean stuff like we were watchign tv and she said iw as a skinny baby but then i got fat grrr. she always says stuff like that it drives me nuts cuz like while i think i'm too fat no one would ever call me fat. grr well anyway i don't get whats up with my mom she's mad when i lose wieght -- or she thinks i lose weight and then she makes comments about me being fat...o well whatever

 
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Old 01-04-2003, 12:53 PM   #2
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Kathrin HB User
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Gosh, sorry you have to go through this, you and your Mom. I guess it's a lot about her not really knowing what she feels either? I remember my parents always gave me mixed messages when I was anorexic, saying things that would contradict each other.
It drove me crazy!

Do you talk about this with your Mom, I mean as in a serious, not-yelling, LOVING, talk? It sounds like there are a lot of unresolved issues, like your Mom's worry over your ED, and her own dissatisfactions with her own weight, maybe part of her was even envious of you when you lost weight while another part of her was really scared for you, and she felt guilty for having the envious feelings too... just guessing...

Kathrin

 
Old 01-05-2003, 04:31 PM   #3
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Hi!

A lot of what Kathrin said makes sense (hehe, you should be a psych major) anyway---

I know about the mom thing. I have a lot of issues with my mother as well. She doesn't know about my ED, but when people make comments such as "You should watch Sarah, she never eats...." or "Sarah's getting really skinny, i'm starting to worry." My mom will say things like "Oh no, she's fine, look at her, her legs are still really chubby." or "She eats all the time, she doesn't stop eating." or "Yea, well, you should see her in the bathing suit, she's not so skinny then." And these things crush me. I think it's harder to hear from your mom, becaues this is someone that you trust so incredibly much, and this is someone that you love so incredibly much. Someone that you want approval from on every single level...and if they can't give you their support and approval on this then it's like you're back at square one. Good luck, I know mom's are hard. Don't let her ruin all the work you're going through. Your'e better than an ED, I promise...even if you're struggling with your mom right now and she can't see this.

NEVER GIVE UP
~sarah~

 
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