Hey everyone. I have been on the low-end of the normal range for awhile, but I cannot help feeling like I need to lose weight. I compare myself to others frequently, wishing I could be that skinny, even if the person is about the same size as me. I know I have a completely distorted body image, but I do not know how to correct it.
Just last weekend, I visited my family, and one of my cousins said, "Wow, you have gained weight!" I felt so huge and I did not want to eat anything. I know she meant it in a good way, considering I am recovering from anorexia and used to be only 89lbs! However, I cannot get these ED thoughts out of my head.
I have felt overweight ever since I grew out of size 0 jeans! I wish I could view myself more positively, but I may need some support. I have spent a lot of time lately looking up dieting tips, hoping to lose this "extra weight" that I think I have but do not.
hi k2005, well 1st of all if i were you i would politely tell my family members not to mention my appearance, just say it nice and say it hampers your recovery, even if meant in a nice way, to us with ed it is like saying, god have you let yourself go and are piling on pounds, when in reality were not and they only mean it in a nice, positive way. 2nd i assume if you are a recovering anorexic you have been in therapy?? i think you need to visit him or her again, to me it sounds like you are slipping into old patterns of being hung up on being too skinny, and you don't want that to happen !! good luck case
Hey Case! Thanks for the reply. Yes, I have been in therapy, but I discontinued it in January when I returned to college (I had to withdraw from college in September 2005 to seek inpatient treatment for my eating disorder) Following treatment, I began doing really well, but Ed started coming back recently when I finally reached the normal weight range.
As far as my family: yes, I should have said something. I am tired of people commenting about my weight. It seems like, no matter what, someone says something. When I was really thin, people commented about my eating disorder. A customer at work offered me a sandwich, asking me if I eat! Just the other day, my roommate said, "Hey, Kelley, there's a girl in my history class that is even thinner than you! I think she is anorexic!" What is THAT supposed to mean???
In contrast, when I do eat, people still comment. My dad called me a pig when he saw me eating TWO WEEKS AFTER BEING DISCHARGED FROM THE HOSPITAL! I set my plate aside and did not want another bite.
Oh my gosh...it's like you took the words right out of my mouth! I feel the exact same way. I feel so big as it is...and the comments from others are not helping. I hate it when people say, "Wow you are looking so healthy now." It's almost as if I want to be labled as "sickly thin." Why do I think this?? I know deep down that it is good to be healthy. But then I look in the mirror and I don't like what I see.
I am now in my target weight range and I am already wanting to lose weight again. I am starting to obsess about my food intake and how to burn off all the calories...etc. It's like a never-ending cycle. I can't win!
How can I get over this and live my life? I'm sorry, I know I am not helping...I just wanted to tell you that you are not alone.
I hope that everyone is doing well!
Last edited by applecheek; 11-05-2006 at 10:29 PM.
guys, we are all in this together. people always comment to me too, gosh is that all you're having on break, you have no butt in those jeans, heh skinny, and you know that when people keep saying stuff it is because we don't look good, well, healthy to "normal" people and i think they are concerned but they don't realize we think we are fat and it hurts us, their comments. i don't know how to make them stop, i try to ignore them, but it still hurts, it sounds like we all need more therapy, our self image is still very distorted, we can beat ed, and to h**L with "them", they should keep their comments to themselves!!
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