ivy2002

my mom and i dont have a great relationship or anything and ever since she found out about the theraphy stuff, im always depressed or selfish or something with her....but she has always been at me about my weight and now that im back in school she cant watch me as much so she makes it a point to call me and ask if im losing weight, or cutting down, or exercising, what am i eating etc...she tells me to eat under 1000 cals and to write down what i eat aand everything, how far can she push me before i end up in a hospital i take what she tells me to the max and fix it to fit what im doing anyway...she is happy when i lose weight and leaves me alone for a while but then its always back to the same thing and she wonders why i dont like answering the phone when she calls me its not fair to go out to dinner and half way through she tells me to "slow down" like i was eatting all that much anyway, i dont like being watched becausse it makes me nervous but how come i have to be singled out? as if i need something else pushing at me...oh well i guess i already know what will kill me but if it makes her happy for me to be thin so be it...

oh well just my vent for the week

tata
ivy

ps hope everyone has a good weekend

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We have to learn to be our own best friends because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies. ~Roderick Thorp