I am a recovering anorexic who has been unsuccessfully trying to cope with Night Eating Syndrome for about a year- it just keeps getting worse. It's a horrible, vicious cycle where I end up not eating all day because I eat in the middle of the night. I tried eating during the day thinking that it would stop the "hunger" at night but it didn't work- it really has nothing to do with being hungry, I am eating due to stress and am horribly ashamed of it.
What makes matters worse is that I am trying to rid myself of the demon that is anorexia, but can't fully do so as long as I keep eating in the middle of the night. I am so completely terrified of gaining any more weight. I have managed to get up to a healthy weight and having been trying hard to treat my body well... But this Night Eating Syndrome is preventing me from making any more progress. I feel so sick and ashamed most of the day due to my night eating that I can think of nothing but how worthless I am for not being able to control myself. I feel so fat and repulsive that I don't even want to be in my own company. It's ruining my life.
Aside from the mental torment and shame I'm dealing with it's also wreaking havoc on my health causing my body to swell up terribly and giving me acid reflux. It's never healthy to eat late at night- but it's even worse to wake up, eat and go to sleep again multiple times. I haven't had a good night sleep in ages.. I feel like my world is falling apart.
Food has become the bane of my existence even more so than when I was just anorexic- I feel as if I am living in a nightmare. Most of the time I can't even think straight. Everything in my life is suffering.... school, relationships, even my thought patterns. I have come so far into recovery, and now there's this! I don't know what to do- I just keep failing with every attempt I make. All I want is to be happy and for this to end. I fear getting into bed at night because I know I am going to wake up and eat... This is complete agony. My whole life is slowly coming apart- and I fear that if I can't fix this now then there's no hope for me. I can't have a successful life if I can't even stand the sight or the idea of myself. I need help desperately..
Has anybody here suffered from this problem? If so, how did you overcome it? Any advice you may have for me would be appreciated more than I can express... I can't go on like this anymore..
