Fear of regaining weight
Hi, this is my first time ever talking on one of these sites so i'm new to this but I've been reading through certain posts and I feel like it might help for me to talk about how I've been feeling and i'm praying someone can offer me some advice.
I have a terrible fear of gaining weight and I can see that food is taking over every aspect of my life; my thoughts and actions are all revolving around my eating habits and it is driving me insane.
I am 19 years old and have always loved food, but for the past two years, family problems meant I started experiencing weight problems where I would eat anything and everything constantly - without being hungry and just for the sake of eating. Drastic diets brought down my weight but it wouldn't be long before I ended up binge eating again. Earlier this year I reached my heaviest weight of 62kg, which at a height of 160cm is not deemed 'overweight' but was certainly not healthy and since I have quite a small frame it was very visible.
I went on the dukan diet for three months and was able to lose 15kg which has brought me to my current weight of 49kg. Not only do I love the way I look but it makes me feel so great about myself and I never ever want to go back to the way I was before. The only problem is that i've now become obsessed with everything I put in my mouth. I don't want to lose anymore weight, but after dieting for so long i've forgotten what 'normal' eating is like and bottom line is i'm terrified of regaining weight.
I have never lost weight like this before and I love the way I now look, it has given me so much confidence and brought positivity back into my life. But I have realised I am a person who needs to always be careful of what they eat and needs to be in control/discipline myself because I have major tendencies to binge. Is there anyone who can advise me how I can return to a normal lifestyle because this paranoia is starting to drive me crazy and I don't want to develop an eating disorder.