Hi Pat...
Sorry, didn't mean to drop off like that! I have a new boss in the office - so being careful not to spend to much time while working and with Jake's seizures controlled, I have a very active little guy (with lots of cathcing up to do) to go home to! And I'm just behind here...
Girl, don't worry about the age of your child! Your baby is your baby even at 100. I have an 18 year old that I told last week that I'll be reminding him to register for SS when he becomes old enough, because you're always my youngens' and that's what momma's do!
I can so relate to what you are saying about your son being a zombie. We get that with the kids sometimes. Jenny (15 also has epilepsy) comes home from school and sleeps for 2 hours, eats dinner, does homework and goes back to bed and somedays, well Jake just walks in circles kicking a ball... and I know it's the high level of meds he's on.
You are right, it is hit or miss with the meds... With Jake we went through 4 in different combinations over 12 months before we got any type of control. Jenny on the other hand - we hit it the first try. They started her on Tegratol the same day Jake took his last dose. And I'm thinking, this is the biggest waist of time... BUT it worked for her.
So to answer your time question... only the gods know.

With Jake we worked for 11 months before we seen control, Jenny we nailed it the first try, and I've met people on this site who have never gained control regardless of the meds tried or the procedures they went through.
Hang in there. Help him educate himself! Help him figure out any triggers he may have, lack of sleep, stress, being under the weather, etc. That's the best thing you can do for him other then remind him to take his meds
Love and light to all our children.
Lisa and kids