I'm so in love... but worried
My, now, fiancee and I started dating about a year ago. At the time, he couldn't drive... because he told me had a seizure due to an accident... involving him slamming his head into a wall... during a sports game. He told me it could happen to anyone- and couldn't have his license back for 6 months. He assured me he was fine- and that it was 'no big deal'. I recall asking him several times if he had seizures when he was a kid, or if he even had epilepsy. He always said no, and got irritated with me when i asked him.
About 4 weeks ago, he finally got his license back, and that's when the truth slowly started coming out. I learned that he used to have seizures a lot when he was a little kid, and had not had one in years- until 6 months ago during his sports accident. He told me he did have epilepsy.
I really love this man, and he's brought more happiness into my life, than anyone I can think of. Yet, he tells me he gets spells where his vision is blurred/or where he has a hard time speaking.. that last 10-15 mins each. And when I ask him questions, he gets short with me. Especially when I ask him if "he's feeling okay" or "if he's okay to drive". He seems to be more embarrased than irritated. I worry about these spells, and him driving. He's promised me that he can always tell if a "spell" is coming on-- and that he will be fine.
Why did it take him so long to tell me? I've assured him it doesn't bother me, and that I will always be very supportive of him. How do i tell him I want to learn about his disorder because I want to help him? I don't want him to feel embarrased about telling me.
Since this man is going to be in my life... Could this affect children? And will he live a long healthy life with me? Do people with epilepsy live just as long as people without epilepsy?
Is it normal for people with epilepsy to feel ashamed/embarrased about these episodes? I am just really confused, and want to know how I can help him.
Lastly.. although he has never had a seizure or "spell" in my presence, I am a bit clueless. If this were to ever happen in my presence, what do I do to help and/or comfort him?
*sigh*, any help would be appreciated!
I just need to know how to tell him.. "epilepsy does NOT bother me, but being in the dark about your epilepsy DOES bother me".
THANKYOU! Have a great day!