neurowreck

I can go for a while without seizures, but over the last 19 months, it's been the pits. Meds have been changed, but I'm no longer working, which was my identity, and it's so frustrating to not know when they're going to hit (other medical problems complicate things as well). Now applying for social security disability and medicaid- something I thought I'd never do...I'm professional, and have worked for 19 years with insurance, a paycheck I EARNED, and had a sense of purpose....now I just go from day to day not knowing if it's going to be "good", or 'bad"...... quit eating enough to end up using a tube for fluid and food suppplements for a while, since after seizures, I could sleep for days, and have no interest in food....have lost count of how long it's been since eating 3 meals a day. Can't see my neurologist because of no insurance.
My primary doc is great, and respects my knowledge about my own symptoms, so is careful with meds (still on 6 prescriptions- some for seizures, some for the other stuff). Have had more infections here than before moving back up here after 17 years in another state...plan to move back when I'm strong enough, and can get stuff packed....need to go back where things were going well....