Re: I cant do this any more.
First of all you are not a freak!!...You have just not been on a winning streak..(look I am a poet)...
Anyway, what you describe sounds like a lot of stress combined with the epilepsy...(stress is not a good thing)..Of course the forgetfulness etc, is normal before and after siezures..the pain of course is not fun.
As far as the anger is concerned, I am guessing this is part of the stress that you seem to be putting on yourself..(or of course the cards you have been dealt)...Sounds crazy, but think happy thoughts...or even laugh at yourself. (I laugh at myself constantly...but I am funny looking and it is easy)..
It is good you got rid of your ex...getting off meds when you have eplipsy is not a good thing. This is something I attempted as a child..(just stopped taking them)...the shock itself to my system caused what was at one time petite mal siezures that happened infrequently to become grand mal seizures that happend frequently...I very much perfered staring off in space to chewing my tounge and banging my head like it was the last coconut on earth that contained moisture)...It took me nearly 15 years after this mistake to finally control my little rides of adventure (AKA siezures)..
See the Dr....and try...yes try to relax...(remember stress can of course bring on more migraines)..Your condition of course does not help, but the stress is like pouring freshly squeezed lemon juice on to a tounge that has been chewed on for an hour...it hurts..(ourch...stop for a second and see the visual on that one)...
Have a great day!