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Old 11-07-2011, 11:51 PM   #1
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: TN USA
Posts: 5
beans67 HB User
Red face kindda emmbarrased!!

This is my first post but I have to ask...Does anyone else have very little to no sex drive when their seizure activity is on an increase? Maybe it's due to the fact of the exhaustion but my husband feels like a failure and I don't know if this can be an explanation....please help...like I said tuff question for a new member...but one that is important to me..thanks for your time

 
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Old 12-15-2011, 07:24 AM   #2
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: atlanta
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taking-it-easy HB User
Re: kindda emmbarrased!!

beans,

the whole impact of having seizures and change in lifestyle is traumatic. also different medications cause many different issues. i know that i have a very difficult time with being able to just relax and feel good like i was able to before seizures. social situations are more difficult now. interacting with others in general are harder. there is a certain amount of anxiety that comes along with that as i am not able to be as smooth and natural as i used to be. this can bring about feelings of depression and performance anxiety. being intimate with you could be tied in to similar feelings. i know my wife and i are having a difficult time working out the where/when/how ... and simply finding time for sex. it is not so much no sex drive on my end, and definitely not anything with lessening of my attraction for her. it is concerns about overthinking the process. if she is able to do things to help put my mind at ease it helps me "not think so much" and just do.

while not easy i'd say an open and frank discussion between the two of you is the best first step. don't just pretend nothing is wrong. discuss it together as a team. do some intimate things together. take a nice hot bath, give each other massages, he may need you to be more the aggressor sometimes, roleplaying may open some doors, make a date night that puts you both out of your normal routing ... have a nice dinner together ... is he allowed to have a glass or two of wine? come home to some luther vandross on the radio & light some candles around the bedroom ... maybe a tasteful risque movie on the tv.

the important thing is make it fun and enjoyable for each other together as a team.





ral

 
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