First of all DO NOT feel ashamed or keep it a secret. It's nothing bad to hide, there's no reason for it. If anything you should tell people, especially the ones you are around most so they will know what to do if something happens. In my experiences having told somebody has more than helped both me and them. You said you don't have any health care, well more often than not you don't need a ride to the hospital for a seizure. If these people know that, and know how to handle it it will save you I'm sure a butt load of $. Now the "recreational" drug, I'm sure what you mean
and it has helped me for many years. Best thing I can suggest is see a neurologist to get proper help. If the meds are causing them or not working, something else might. There's no need to get hurt by taking something that doesn't work. It took years to find something that worked for me. I hope you can manage to find something to work.