My son has been clean from heroin for 2 1/2 years and crack for eight months. He still smokes pot and won't go to meetings. His ex girlfriend-the one he did so much heroin with- died Friday night on her birthday of an overdose. They had broken up because my son couldn't handle her occasional use of heroin. She had stopped doing it daily and was holding down a job and even had enrolled at college for the fall. She seemed to be doing better. He had talked to her just last week. They had remained friends. But it was her birthday and she was the kind that couldn't say no if it was put right in her face. And because she probably hadn't done it in a while took too much. After they broke up she called me a number of times because she needed a mother figure. She lived with her parents who were in total denial of her drug abuse. They knew but preferred not to face it. I feel so bad to see a life wasted like that. She was a good girl who did drugs. I started Al Anon last week again because of my own son. I am still having trouble detaching from him emotionally. I think about him way to much. He still can't hold down a job- always gets fired sooner or later--can't pay his rent--will probably get kicked out of the place he is staying by the end of the week--won't have money for food and the list goes on. I don't give him money or a place to stay--I have learned that much--but I can't stop thinking about him and his problems. Hopefully Al Anon will help me.
JOAN, that is such sad news..but, we hear these stories all the time..Maybe this will be your sons turning point..and he will try harder to get this life back together..lets hope something good comes out of this tradegy..i will say a prayer for her parents..
well if he still smokes pot, then it doesnt matter, CAUSE HE AINT CLEAN!!!! is he on any methadone program or suboxone mainteance? just wondering.. bc if hes doing one drug, then theres a good chance hes doing other drugs... or soon enough he may slip up on the other harder drugs... thats just the way it usually happends, i am an addict also, and thats how it always turned up for me, and a lot of other people i know!! so just be carefulll.
You are right, he isn't clean. The pot just takes away all his ambition. I know he's clean from the hard drugs because I drug test him myself. When I first found out he was doing heroin 2 1/2 years ago, I tested him daily, sometimes twice daily. I bought drug tests in bulk online. He still tells me that's what kept him off the hard stuff. He's 26 years old. Now it's his turn. Either he stops the pot or he doesn't. I'm taking care of myself from now on. No more drug tests. He has to do this on his own. Tough love - It's so hard. I still can't get him out of my mind. I think about his problems way too much. He put himself where he is, not me. I just don't know how to stop worrying about him.