I have been lingering in the background for awhile now, absorbing all the good advise and information. My problem:
My son who is now 21 has a very bad knee, he hurt it playing football and baseball in high school. He has had 8 knee surgeries in his short life. I know his pain is real and I feel so sorry for him. I let this feeling lead us to a pain clinic about a year ago. I know he was taking illegal meds before this, probably smoking pot and an occasional pill whenever he had the money. This pain dr perscribed him Lortab and then Fentynl and then Percs and finally Oxycontin. Around 6 months ago we went to a dr to schedule more surgery and he threw a fit about the pain meds. In order to do the surgery needed he had to completely come off the pain meds, Oxy at that time. Since then he has come off the Oxy, 20 mg BID, but couldn't come off the rescue percs that the dr perscribed. At first he was taking 2 Perc 10's in the middle of the day. The pain dr took him all the way down to 4 Perc 5's a day. My son was in terrible pain and went without me once and came home with 5 Perc 10's daily. Another scope procedure was schedule just to see what extent knee surgery he would need to have. Needless to say, pain control was a major problem. They could not control his pain after this minor surgery. He cried and screamed and there was nothing I could do but watch. We came home after being told by the dr that he was very disappointed that my son was on so much meds. The major surgical procedure could not be scheduled until he was off the meds. I am now concerned that his addiction is worse than I thought. I think he is crushing his meds and snorting them. What should I do? I am so disturbed and concerned. Can he do this on his own? SHould he go to a rehab clinic. Should he try Sub? Any advice would be so appreciated! I love my son and would do anything in the world for him. Oh by the way, he has a newborn son, 8 weeks old. HELP!
ffb my drug of choice was perks i am a 25 year abuser i had knee surgery and made myself and doctors believe i was in pain to maintain my addiction. Your son needs to realize he needs help. I was lucky and i got sick and tired of being sick and tired i got on Suboxone for a month and quit percs and got off the sub . please realize these are the hardest little pills to quit opiates seek professional advice we will all pray for you stay strong. all the best God bless you . wireman
yes i think that sub is easier to get off. I only did two 2mg pills a day and then tapered down to one the to a half then to none. I found that to work for me. It was weird i took chantix to quit smoking ciggs and that also helped me with the wds from the percs good luck you can do it. all the best
he can try sub, but it only works for pain in some people, not all. and if he DOES have to take opiates for any reason, they wont work while he's on it. at all.
i think for him rehab is the best way to go. what did the doctor say? did he just tell him to get off all the meds and not offer to help in any way? maybe you can ask him for help. its worth a try. good luck to you and your son, what an awful predicament to be in !!! please post and let us know how he's/your doing, okay?
The doc is very aware of the problem. He is trying to slowly taper him off. I think this will be unsuccessful. He will not let me hand feed the pills to him. He let me give him the pills when he was on 5 a day, now that the doc is tapering off he won't give me the pills to dispense. I think he is taking more and will run out at the end of the month. He did this a few months ago and he was going nuts and he bought a couple on the street. I will not give him money ever again to buy drugs from the street. I told him I would be glad to call the ambulance for him. He will probably find something to pawn and get the meds anyway. I am just SOL. I see no light at the end of this tunnel.
Thanks for the advice anyway!
ok well i can definitly relate to you..my son is 21 yrs old and is also a pill addict..vicodins, percocets,whatever- all the same crap. truth be told if he doesnt want to stop than he wont.. if he wants to have a drug free life he needs a full detox than some kind of rehab...but only if is he is ready. i love my son with all my heart just like you..he went thru a 30 day inpatient rehab and was clean for 7 mths...he recently relapsed for a week or so ...hes off again..and is trying to go to outpatient rehab and keep his job etc.....in my eyes its a series of steps that need to be taken.. first he has to admit to being an addict..than if he wants the help but doesnt want rehab he should go to an n.a meeting and listen. i am no expert, just somebody that has a son that is an addict..we are living this for the past year..maybe you can talk him into a meeting..
(((((ffb))))) your son is going to have to realize his problem for himself and be committed to wanting to fix it....nobody can do it for him but himself. Unfortunately in most cases one must hit rock bottom to do this.
My brother has a chronic illness and I think that he too is addicted to some of his meds. He is feeling better and living a better life but still we know if it isn't the illness that will get him it will be the meds doing his kidneys in!!
Anyway just wanted to let you know that I am sending prayers your way.
Jules ~ I know you had a meeting today about your son I left a message for you on the other board.
I don't think he wants to quit yet. As difficult and heart wrenching as it is to sort of stand by and watch, he has to be the one to make that decision. If he's not ready, rehab won't do it...meetings won't do it. As another poster said, he hasn't hit his bottom yet. Very very tough position- that's an understatement. I had to watch my ex boyfriend fall off the wagon,HARD, after being sober for over 10 years. Nothing I said or did made a lick of difference. No ultimatums, no threats, no crying and pleading, nothing. I no longer figured into the equation- it was all about the drugs and drinking....that was his #1.
You may have to do the tough love thing. It sucks, but sometimes it's the only way.
Yes I agree that he will only get sober when he wants it, but sometimes they do want to be clean and sober they just dont know how to ask for it without feeling weak about themselves and guilt thats another thing guilt about what he has done to himself and everyone around him will keep him using. Sounds crazy I know but its the truth, so if you can try and get a calm sitdown with him and have a heart to heart and both have to try your best to keep a calm level head, because we all know we dont say or act how we want when angry. That might help get thru the first and hardest stage knowing you have a problem. Bringing it out into the open and understanding and truely wanting to get clean.
Best of luck to all with this problem hoped I helped a little
Hello all new to this board and trying to quit smoking
My son is a recovering opiate addict. He's 26 years old and it all started in Jan of 2003. He got his first painkillers from a Dr. And when the Dr. told him he had to wean off he started buying and selling heroin. Meanwhile he was seeing a psychiatrist who was giving him xanax and klonopins like candy. It's a long story so I'll skip most of it but it came down to me finding the heroin in his sock drawer and flushing it down the toilet along with his legal prescription for 80mgs of oxycontin 3X a day which he got from his psychiatrist. I gave him two choices. Get out or get clean. He knew if he walked out the door I would never let him back in so he detoxed cold turkey at home with either his father or I staying with him. It took 7 days. He had gone cold turkey before from the painkillers so we knew what to expect but he did it. That was almost three years ago and he has been clean ever since. Though he had one two week period where he did crack cocaine but he told me and I told him to take care of it or leave. He went to the local psyche ward and spent Christmas there taking care of it. He was still living with me last summer but then he went to Florida for the winter and his sister and her husband moved in with me and he was told he couldn't live with us anymore. Even though he was clean, sort of, still smoking pot, he has to learn to work and live on his own. I had to go to Al Anon so I would stop enabling him and see a therapist. This summer when he came home he ended up living in his van in the Walmart parking lot but he finally got a job and got a room and did it on his own. He is living in Buffalo now for a few months trying to save enough money to get to Florida. He's a fisherman. Fishing keeps him away from drugs. He hates the cold and can't wait to get out of Buffalo. But he met a nice girl but I don't think she will go to Florida with him.
Anyway, the point is there is always hope. There were times when I thought he would never straighten himself out but he did. He weaned off the xanax and the klonopins too after he went cold turkey. He did not want to live on the streets and that's where he knew he was headed. I can still remember when I flushed 44 packets of heroin down the toilet and he just stood there staring at me. That's when he knew it was over. I also drug tested him every day after that. I bought drug tests on line in bulk. Later he told me that's what kept him off the drugs because he knew if he came up positive he'd be out the door with nowhere to go.
joan, we spoke plenty before.. my son did relapse last week with benzos and opiates..he went on a weekend long binge..we called an ambulance and they put him in the hospital overnight with 5 shots of ativan and haldol to calm him down...hes been off drugs all this week still testing positive for the benzos but that takes time...he had them injected in the hospital so it could take weeks to come out of his system..i could look at his eyes and tell if hes using...hes not and hes back to 90 meetings in 90 days and starting and outpatient rehab with pysch care soon..i just need to know their is hope because without it i dont think i can go on.. he was clean for 8 mths so i know he is capable of it..
I'm so sorry you have to go through this again. My son relapsed twice, I think before staying clean for so long. You get so tired of worrying about them but I have been going to Al Anon a lot lately and I have been seeing a therapist for six months. Even though he is clean he still has the addictive personality and I still have to deal with it. He never went to meetings. I wish he would. I know the meetings will help your son and hopefully he gets a good sponsor. Three more people died in our town of heroin overdoses in the past week and I live in a small beautiful seaside village where you just wouldn't think things like this would happen. I think I might have told you his ex-girlfriend died in Sept. of an overdose. He wanted to beat the *^#* out of the boy who gave her all the heroin for her birthday. She died on her birthday. But like I said to him, that boy was him three years ago. I think it really made him realize how bad the stuff is. If only they can learn from their mistakes and not keep making them over and over and over. I wish you and you son the best.
Such a terrible way to learn huh? anyway my son has a sponsor but that didnt stop him from relapsing.. they tell me relapse is part of the process. joan, i love this boy more than anything..hes so smart he had a 3.8 gpa in college..hes too smart for his own good..does that make sense? anyway he is at a meeting tonite so we have some peace here...