Re: How do I help my husband end alchohol.
You have to take care of yourself first and foremost. If you don't, you cannot help your children or your husband.
If there was no one else at AlAnon, try a different AlAnon meeting at a different time of day or hit a meeting at a different location. Sometimes larger meetings have more people attending both 12 Step programs.
As for the AA meeting he attended, check into other meetings around town. Depending upon the size of the city where you live, you may well find meetings with a greater variety of people attending. The point is to keep going back to meetings to learn how to live a sober life.
Why would you tell your husband how horrible detoxing from booze will be? He'll find out as he experiences it. He likely knows far more than you may think he does about it anyway. To discuss how hard it's going to be ahead of time just gives him ammo to stop doing the deed, to begin drinking again.
For me, attending 12 Step meetings every single day was paramount in the first 90 days of my recovery. That may sound impossible, but as I wrote here recently and have said dozens of times, if I had time to drink and drug each day, I definitely had sixty minutes for an AA or NA meeting each day.
Whether he continues to attend AA meetings or not, whether he gets sober or keeps on drinking, you can find an AlAnon meeting and go for yourself and your children. Depending upon their ages, there may also be AlaTeen meetings for them, too.
I wish you all the best,