I'm trying to get my son in rehab after 13 yrs of various drug/alcohol addictions....
He's 29 and is totally dependent. . . his dad and me have insurance but he doesn't.
Hello hope52 and welcome.
Have you ever thought about having an intervention,where family members can caringly explain how much he's loved but also explain the heartache that is caused by his addiction,as it effects not only the addict but their families/loved ones also.
Does he admit that he has a problem?
If he's in denial,it's going to be an uphill battle trying to get him into rehab;unless he goes out of guilt.Going in this way may not be ideal,as he wouldn't be doing it for himself,just to get you from annoying him(as he would see it).
He can try to apply for emergency medical assistance at the local social services office,unless you have the financial means to place him in rehab(the prices can be a bit lofty).
He has to really want this,for there to be a chance of a successful recovery.
With respect to centers,you can try contacting your regional mental health association.
If there are any questions that you need to ask further,please don't hesitate to ask;that's what we're here for.
To offer advice and support in a non-judgemental manner.
Hope-- I agree with Phoenix, get to Social Services and apply for emergency Medicad. Your son has no income and is totally dependent on you and your husband. When you call some rehabs ask them what options you have for your son. Keep asking questions! I know of rehabs here in NY that will help you with the emergency Medicad. People here call Medicad the "Gold Card". Once you get it, it covers most services totally.
Yeah he does....he wants sobriety and a job, etc......
I have checked into a place in "estes park" and others and no they are way too expensive unfortunately.....
I've even called some of the so-called free places. . .
Hello again hope52
Desperate times call for equal measures.
I'm hearing from you that you want a new,productive life for him and if he is willing to go the social services route it can be attainable.
Don't worry about the "low income" and indigent aspect of things.There is nothing to be embarrassed with.He simply doesn't have the financial means to do it on his own.
Would you believe me if I told you that I used drugs on and off for 10 years and have been clean since 2000(actually late 1999 but I tend to round it off).
I waited in the social services offices and like candyheart has stated,some rehab centers even help you with medicaid.
Unfortunately,all cannot make it to the most expensive centers.
I have been in a 30 day rehab twice in my lifetime and actually went to the same center.It may have not been the most expensive of places but at this point all he really needs is a bed(with pillow of course and sheets,which will be supplied to him) a desire and the professionals will do the rest. They'll explain what additional clothing,etc. he may need to bring along.
Some of the most honest and qualified individuals can be found in these facilities.
Here's a little thing that will help him make the most out of any place he goes;show the desire and don't be afraid to ask questions.
Whether from Park Place or park bench,we all deserve to get the help that is out there for us.
Do not give up and keep asking questions.
There's no such thing as a silly question if you really aren't aware of the answer to it.
Are you willing to work with us,as much as we are willing to work with you and your son?
You won't be sorry you did;especially if he has the desire in his heart to want better for himself.
Most Respectful and Sincere Wishes
The streets are ready to chew up and spit out any individual that is miserable;let's help keep your son out of those streets,so when he does finally come out of rehab,he'll be more aware of his responsibilities to himself.The transitional phase is so important in recovery.
When in doubt, post it out.
Last edited by Phoenix; 08-02-2012 at 12:58 AM.
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Phoenix For This Useful Post: nevaeh1226 (07-28-2012), rumorwild (07-10-2012), Wendy88 (08-01-2012)
Hope--It would be wonderful if he got in and soon! If he is ready to get sober this will be a great experience for him. Once he is in, don't worry about him-- he is in a safe place and I am sure he will feel very comfortable there. He will be with other people just like himself. In many rehabs the staff themselves are in recovery...Most have many, many years sober. They really GET IT! Please do keep us posted. We really care and can try to answer any questions you may have.
The following user gives a hug of support to candyheart: Phoenix (07-10-2012)
The sad truth about rehabs is, you have to find the perfect one for him. Most rehabs provide a very supportive, caring environment where everyone will want to hear about his problems and 'understand' him. The real world could not be any more different to this. No one cares, no one wants to 'understand' and if he comes out of rehab and is used to talking about himself and his problems, he soon won't have any friends and will probably turn back to drugs. It is my belief that the only way rehab works is if the person stays there for around 2 years, cuts off all ties with every friend they ever had (this is very very sad but true) perhaps excepting a long-term partner who really loves them and who you both like, and believe would never do anything to allow him to get back on stuff. When the period in rehab is finished it is necessary for that person to relocate to a new city, and with luck and finances, a new country. This way they have a clean 'Identity Slate' and can introduce themselves to new people as a new person. Sometimes a person really does want to stop but they love their friends and their friends love the drugs. It is also necessary for him to delete his ******** profile and not inform anyone that he is going away, or where he is going. If your son feels very sad about breaking off certain ties, tell him that in 5 years or something he can visit them again and perhaps rebuild some of the friendships he missed, but he needs to put enough time between them for him to recover - maybe even for them to recover. Unfortunately the bottom line of addiction is this, he will not stop unless he wants to, or unless he is locked up - and not locked up with other drug addicts, I mean locked up in an Observation room where the only people he has contact with are the nurses while he withdraws. As a parent, if you have the money for this, do it. He is your son, and this is not the life he envisioned for himself when he as 6. Taking 2 - 5 years to deal with his addiction properly is worth it, he may have another 50 ahead of him in that case.
Last edited by Beanling; 07-11-2012 at 02:32 AM.
Reason: misspelt words
Let me officially welcome you to this particular board.
What I was trying to do was first get him into a facility; then get into the crux of what to do next.
You were having a difficult enough time with getting your son into a rehab.
This,for many families,can be an emotionally exhaustive experience.
Take care and Blessings