I need to get second opinions and support on something that has been deeply troubling me. Recently I had to give my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years a choice to quit doing cocaine. I started realizing he was having problems with addiction. Long story short..guess what..he dumped me(big surprise). He has an a avoid-ant attachment style. He has worked his way up to Bartender for years at a local dive bar/art gallery. Although he has never liked drinking I noticed he began needing to be buzzed at work and started drinking a little more. But what started to concern me is that he was doing coke up to 3 times a week. He has been heavily addicted to it in the past. I also began to notice his only friends where in some way involved with drugs wether it was dealing or just addict types. I just saw his life going in the complete opposite direction of mine.
During the time we had been together I got really close to his family. 2 mormon parents who don't even drink coffee, him (oldest) and his 4 younger siblings. He moved out of home years past about 2 hours away from his parents. Recently his 18 year old sister moved in with him to be closer to the city for school/work. Before he broke up with me he mentioned something about his sister "starting to go down that path" (drugs)
My Ex has some slight social issues, I'm sure there are reasons why he is choosing to be an addict including seasonal depressions and health issues. Not to mention addiction runs in his family. I'm the only one who knows him this well, and I feel like I should get his parents involved but don't know if it would help or hurt the situation. We are having no contact now, but I found out he already has another girlfriend and it's only been 5/6 weeks. I wonder if what I did is everything I could or should. I feel like I communicated very clearly and kindly to him, I gave him a vision of what his life would be like if he got a better job and worked on his drug addiction. I told him quitting cocaine is the first most important thing he needs to do in his life. But sadly he seems to think that the bar is the only place in the world to work. Plus he is starting to make money and feels good about his job. Should I just call it quits and move on knowing I did everything I could? or would at least telling his parents be one last thing I could do? His mother would probably be worried/helpful.(the family had to deal with getting her sister off crack). His father would probably get REALLY angry. Family dynamics are such a sensitive thing. I just don't know if I should bother or if it would help anything. I mean who works their way up into a career where they can drink on the job and be high, during a time when they should be gaining skills and growing up in the world? He loves to read, and make art, photography, and music when he's not sleeping in from his late nights. I don't want him to keep doing this to other girls either. He's totally run away from his previous ex too.
It would be really helpful if someone could give some advice or words of encouragement because this has SUCKED!