Does my Fiance have APD?
After reading a little bit about Avoidance Personality Disorder I've been wandering if my Fiance has APD.
She is very quiet around anyone that is perceived to be in authority. Around people our age, she is outgoing and talks like any other normal adult. When we visit my parents house, she simply sits there, and whispers stuff in my ear that she wants to say out loud but wishes that I would say it for her. She is very sensitive to Criticism; she gets upset over the smallest point of negativity towards her and a lot of the time rebukes the criticism.
She is very quiet and I'm sure to outsider is perceived as being "rude" or "unfriendly". But an hour with her and shes speaks normal like anyone else would.
I'm not sure if this is something caused by the environment she grew up in, or if its APD. During High school/collage she was always an average student as I was. I've heard her say many times that she feels like her parents arnt proud of her and are only proud of her sister because she is smart. She has trouble having confidence in her answers, and I believe that is directly related to growing up feeling lower than her sister.
She has trouble making decisions, most of the time her answers are "I don't know, I don't care, whatever you want to do, etc". It gets extremely frustrating sometimes. I love her very much and only want to help her.
A couple months ago we postponed our wedding because she was having cold feet, I'm not sure if its because of having APD or because she didn't feel confident she was doing the right thing. She told me she didn't feel confident, which hurt me quite a lot. She has told me that she made a mistake wanting to postpone and that she wants to marry me, But when I ask her "When" she says "Whenever you want to". Kind of hurts, but that may just be her personality. She doesn't like it when I bring up what happened in the past.
It has been a hard last couple of months, but I still love her and we are trying to move on. But I need to know what is wrong so I can help. Do you think that this is APD or some other type of Personality Disorder? And if so, are there ways of helping, because I know she would not want to see a Doctor about this.
Thanks and I would appreciate some Insight.
Last edited by Rider0375; 04-30-2007 at 08:06 AM.