My Daughter Has Borderline Personality Disorder - Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill Message Board

freckles50 · 04-02-2008, 04:38 PM

Could someone give me a *edited* to help me understand what this is...or possibly a book? My daughter is 32 and has this...I believe she's had it her entire life. I've spent most of that time being frustrated with her behavior and angry at her.

*This board is a place to support and learn about patients, not a place to talk about your problems dealing with them. Specific boards are available for those who deal with people with illness/problems. This is not a caretakers, parenting or relationship health board.*

At age 57 I want to try to be a better mother to her! Her father has disowned her because she embarrasses him. Help!

rosequartz · 04-04-2008, 08:13 AM

there are some good books out there on BPD
"I hate you, don't leave me"
"stop walking on eggshells"

dumakey77 · 04-04-2008, 02:33 PM

wow that sounds like my story! had it all my life and was misdiagnosed millions of times. and had to deal with the frustration of my mother who had no clue what to do with me. i was actually commited to the nut hut over 12 times in all those years.

apparently borderline disorder is a newer type of illness and there isnt much info about it because it is a confusing mess of symptoms. ihave checked and have many of the symptoms but what i really want is an explaination of how to care for this. so i know what you are going through and i am so sorry that you have to be in this situation.

there are some good pagesif you know how to manipulate a search engine*

and a few really good books that are great for you and for your daughter...

you will be in my prayers,

i would like it if you would update and let us know if you found anything and if it is helping.

trg247 · 04-04-2008, 04:55 PM

Dialectical behavioral therapy is proving to be the most effective type of treatment for BPD. A big part to recovery is the person actually admitting there is a problem and wants to change for without this there is not a lot of hope for improvement.

Rottenbaby13 · 04-12-2008, 02:43 PM

Hi there,

Being a mother of a daughter with BPD, too, I can feel for you.

I don't want to infringe on board policy, being that niether of us have the illness, but I do want to throw my two cents in about one of the books mentioned...hopefully it will help somebody!

I Hate You, Don't Leave Me was a very scary, unhelpful, negative journey to take in the beginnings of all this. I would say that reading something more supportive and positive would be very helpful, for people with the disorder and for people supporting family members and friends.

Instead, I recommend:

Get Me Out Of Here: My Recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder by Rachel Reiland

and

Lost In The Mirror: An Inside Look At Borderline Personality Disorder by Richard Moskovitz (This was the most helpful..it put a very positive spin on having a person with this disorder in your life...)

I did a "Borderline Personality Disorder" search and came up with those. I also saw a few on Cognitive-Behavioral Treatment and DBT: Dialectical Behavior Therapy (don't confuse Dialectical with Diabolical, lol) for sale but I would just hit the library.

Good luck!

Helen