OCD (My Boss has it and I need advice !) How can I support him?
I work very closely with my boss. I see his work slowed down by ocd. He told me he suffers from this disorder and I finally read books and realized that this was truely a constant disruption throughout our day. He obsesses, then when the compulsions start...he slows down and can't hardly function. He doesn't know I have read up on this subject. So, I need advice from someone who suffers from ocd....Please tell me how I can approach this problem while he is in this state of brain lock. Should I say it straight-forward? Or, Is there some other way to offer support? Thank You!
Dear Chrys, Thank you for your encouragement. And, what I am hearing is that only medicine and a therapist can help him. I am afraid to suggest these to him. I believe he already knows this and may have at some point tried these methods.
I was hoping to find out if I could somehow snap him out of it (brain lock) while we are working. It causes trouble in our schedule (delays, running late,etc).
He is a nice person and I don't want to be pushy or offensive. And, I need to know if any of my efforts could ever be helpful.
It seems so far, whenever I try to help by telling him to move it (in a nice way!)...he has two reactions....sometimes he appreciates it and thanks me ....and other times he gives me the impression that he hates me.
He may be BiPolar, and he also said he suffers from PTSD. And tells me I cause a negative reaction from him. I feel like I may need a therapist because his reactions to my efforts seems to fluctuate.
Thanks again Chrys.....Gevalia
[This message has been edited by Gevalia (edited 07-29-2002).]
I understand the brain lock as even with meds it still happens to me sometimes and it is an awful time waster. Often when I would go into that freeze, my husband & I would end up in an argument because he would get irritated and I wasn't in a rational enough state to understand his irritation.
So one day we sat down and discussed it(not during a freeze, mind you) and came up with a code word. Now when I go into that state, he just says the code word, neither of us gets upset and it actually kind of snaps me out of it.
I know it sounds kind of lame, but it has worked great for us. Perhaps, if you feel comfortable enough, you and your boss could work out something similar. Good luck!......mslily
Using a code word is a great idea! I am glad it works for you. And I appreciate you taking the time to share it with me. He has let me know that I need to gently remind him to "move along"....and I try to do it in several different ways. Using a code word would simplify this issue.
Thank you for shedding light on this problem for me. Your imput has help me to understand that this is a real problem and there are ways to cope! Thank YOU!
What do you think???? should I do it? He suggested to me today that I should go to Al-Anon meetings to help me cope with him. I am so confused.....is this a good idea? I don't understand how this would help him or I. Gevalia
Thank you for your opinion....I think it is a very honest and accurate one. My feelings were that he was just not really sincere about doing his part to make things right and just laying it on me.
Thanks again, your help has been priceless. You are doing a very kind and helpful service to me and others with your replies. I am guessing that you are a professional or studying to be one. Whatever the case may be....you certainly have the quality of a professional. Thank you, Gevalia