Could my wife be suffering from schizophrenic - Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill Message Board

johnhealth · 01-05-2003, 12:10 AM

I as discussing some of the issues myself and my wife, and her and her friends today with a friend she suggested that my wife could be schizophrenic because her brother is.
my wife is not see wired things or act outrageous or anything like that but she does do the following:
She has difficulty keeping friends for long periods of time because she has a tendency to twist the things people say into what she wants to believe they said, and then tell them what they said based on her understanding (not always, but a major problem).
She tells people others said things about them that are not true to create enemies, and then tries to stay friends with both sides.
She usually she is always looking at things people say in a way negative, even for helpful suggestions.
She often believes people are jealous of her even when they have no reason to be.
She often thinks that her way is the only correct way and often rejects reason.
She always finds reasons to hate other that don’t agree with her.
She holds grudges for long periods of time for ridiculous things.
She often says she is doing things a certain way because God said, which is good to listen to god, but sometimes the things she does do not come from sound reasoning.
Always thinks people don’t want to see her succeed.
Please help because we have kids and the marriage is becoming unbearable for me.
I myself am starting to get really stressed out over dealing with the issues and am thinking of divorce more seriously.
I want to help her but I don’t just want to take her to a counselor who would either keep us coming just to make money, put her on pills as a quick answer or some hospital.
All responses will be greatly appreciated.

Karla · 01-06-2003, 02:30 PM

It sounds like she has issues a councelor would be best helping her with. Doesn't sound like sz. However, a phyciatrist should be able to tell if it is sz. And could help her the best either way. It may take a long time for her to get better. She will need counceling for a long time. She has many issues. This is not something that will go away overnight. I hope you are in it for the long hall.

friendlione · 01-09-2003, 10:37 AM

johnhealth:
The quickest way to help a loved one is to get help yourself.
See a counselor, tell your wife that you can't handle how she is and that you are getting help and support with it. Don't judge her, just get what YOU need. Then you will learn to see your part in the relationship, learn how to interact with her in healthy ways as she IS, and it will be a catalyst for change in her life.

When one person changes in a marriage it forces the other to grow or go.

You can't control her, but you can control yourself.
If you do this, get ready for some radical (and good) changes in your marriage.

Excalibre · 02-27-2003, 12:30 AM

hello johnhealth. i am Mr.X , schizophrenic, and am recovering well. tell u the truth it sounds alot like something else. more towards obsessive compulsive disorder or even a personality dosorder( changing friends all the time). the only sign that i see of schizophrenia is "because God said so." is she hearing voices? has she withdrawn from reality? you need to find out these paticular things to find out forsure
i dont know how it works down where you luve but where i'm from the first step would be a councellor, i now you're trying to avoid that but this is what the standard procudure is. first step is the councellor, next she will tell you his/her opinion. if she thinks its something serious, you would then have to see ur family doctor and get a referal to see a psyciatrist which is really what you want.if she has schizophrenia, then the worst is yet to come if you dont act qucik. in the mean time look out for these specific signs. disorganized speech which is hard if not impossible to follow or understand, twitching may mean shes having dellusions, mumbling can also mean shes having dellusions, pausing in between words while shes talking may mean she hears her own thoughts, a change in sleep patterns in most cases less sleep, a sudden change in mood from happy to down right fear may mean shes withdrawn from reality and not knowing her surroundings( if this happens it will be obvious shes in her own world in her own mind), holding uncomfortable positions for long periods of time( curled up in a ball is most common) extreme paranoia,sleep walking, dreaming in a conscience state, trouble doing everyday activities such as driving a vehicle or working at her job and most imporatantly, a BIG change in personality does not mean its schizophrenia but action must be taken regardless. research on Manic-Depressive Disorder(Bipolar), Schizoaffective Disorder, and Personality Disorders. try and find out as much as you can about these types of psychosis' and see what fits in the most. some people with bipolar have an extreme paranoia about having schizophrenia and may hide it. i must say i'm not an expert but i have had schizophrenia long enough to know what its all about and what can happen if action os not taken.i wish you the best and remember that there is hope for ur wife. have a nice day.

respectfully,
Mr.X.

HoosierBj · 04-14-2003, 03:58 PM

I would diagnosis your wife as having a bad case of the meanies!
Sometimes the worst thing is when there is just no such thing as a medical diagnosis for "not being nice".
At best, maybe there is a Personality Disorder that would cover it, but none of the examples you listed were anything other than examples of things I have run across being done by other people who just plain lack empathy and don't care how other people feel.
It would be incredibly difficult to live with such a person and I recognize your effort to find some way to deal with it. While you cannot control what she says & does, counseling may help you deal with what she says & does to you...
Good Luck,
Bj