It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 11-10-2011, 03:45 PM   #1
Senior Veteran
(male)
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bean Station, TN, usa
Posts: 2,190
mudhound HB User
fed up with son

Vent!

Just a quick post to vent! My adult son (age 25) refuses to work, clean house, pick up his own mess, mow the yard, take off the trash, and most every thing else.

My own mind says he is just milking his illness. Sure, he may very well be VERY sick and can not help it. But, he does finds ways to play with his friends.

I am getting so fed up with being his butler, maid, and keeper. I would put him on notice that he needs to secure other housing but the wife stops me flat out.
__________________
God Bless

Mudhound

 
Old 11-10-2011, 07:30 PM   #2
Senior Member
(female)
 
frisbeefreak's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: California
Posts: 182
frisbeefreak HB Userfrisbeefreak HB Userfrisbeefreak HB Userfrisbeefreak HB Userfrisbeefreak HB User
Re: fed up with son

Whoa whoa whooooa there. First off, what illness does he have that he's "milking". I think he's just a lazy boy and needs someone to kick him in the *** and give him a dose of reality. He's a big boy, I say ultimatum. Stay very firm. Time for him to grow up. I'm 23 and when I lived with my parents I earned my keep out of respect and thankfulness I have for them. It was awfully nice they let me continue to live at home for free while I continued my education (college). As for your wife, what would she do if you did do something? Does she not see it?

Last edited by frisbeefreak; 11-10-2011 at 07:32 PM.

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 11-11-2011, 03:27 AM   #3
Senior Veteran
(male)
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bean Station, TN, usa
Posts: 2,190
mudhound HB User
Re: fed up with son

Just to let you know, this was just a rant. I needed to vent badly.

Here are a few details: My son is 25 years old. He is a US Navy veteran with 4 years of service. He has been diagnosed with depression, PTSD, and possibly bipolar. His mother is bipolar.

During his high school years he was a “A or B” student. He excelled is areas like math and computer science.
During his Navy service he excelled and was promoted to e-5 in less than 3 years. This is almost unheard of in the military.
Because of his military service he has a “full or complete” scholarship for college. Heck, they even pay him to go to school. Yet, he has not been in school since December of last year.

One detailed rant goes like this: I came down hard several months back about being extremely messy. His main reply is or was if you will leave me alone I will get it done. I did this for 1 month. During this time period the mess got no better and maybe got even a little worse. I have a bathroom in my own house that I have not used in 2 years. It is a total mess. I would describe it as it would make some SICK.

Now: He lives like this. He claims to be fearful of germs. Well, I’d say he must be lying because I am not and I can not get close to his toilet. Not even to mention the other sections of his bathroom.
It was so bad that the indoor dog needed a bath (his bath has the only tub) and he was not home. I went in there and would not give my dog a bath in that tub.

I LOVE my son and want the best for him. I still believe in him. I mean I think he can do better. Sure, he will have to try a bit harder than someone without a mental illness. But, I know he can. He was brought up right with morals, ethics, and manors. He was and is gifted in music. So, all in all I see him just giving up. It makes me sick!
__________________
God Bless

Mudhound

 
The following user gives a hug of support to mudhound:
tinkerbell45 (11-13-2011)
Old 11-15-2011, 10:49 AM   #4
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
rosequartz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Chicago,IL
Posts: 10,224
rosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB Userrosequartz HB User
Re: fed up with son

Quote:
Originally Posted by mudhound View Post
Vent!

I am getting so fed up with being his butler, maid, and keeper. I would put him on notice that he needs to secure other housing but the wife stops me flat out.
is your wife willing to be his butler, maid and keeper, or does she just expect you to do it, keep a smile on your face and not complain??

there are 2 problems here.....1 is your son, the 2nd is your wife....
what's she doing to help solve the problem?

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Adult daughter with BPD ScarlettA Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill 2 06-24-2005 01:20 PM
Need help with sister with schizophrenia. shay34 Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill 4 04-17-2005 01:44 PM
Fed up with my BPD friend! :( Blue102 Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill 2 04-06-2005 05:55 AM
Dealing with a friend who has BPD. Ederratic Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill 1 01-31-2005 02:51 PM
Wife May Be Manic-Depressive - Help With Symptoms DB1973 Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill 19 01-01-2005 02:01 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



rosequartz (10), katlin09 (3), writeleft (3), rudiraven (3), Breezin (3), ladybud (3), Mihral21 (2), solofelix (2), multiplefriend (2), Stacey1970 (2)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1136), MSJayhawk (941), Apollo123 (857), janewhite1 (823), Titchou (773), Gabriel (743), ladybud (667), sammy64 (666), midwest1 (655), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:50 PM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.com™
Copyright and Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.com™ All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!