My husband is Bipolar and I'm exhausted
I'm new here, but I don't know where else to go.
I am totally in love with my husband. He is affectionate, loving, a great provider, great dad, hilarious, etc.....85% of the time. It's the other 15% that scares the heck out of me.
He has horrible episodes where he just attacks. It can occur over the smallest thing, something insignificant (at least to me). When something sets him off he is totally irrational. Everything he says is right, and nothing he says is quiet. His voice gets louder and louder until he is yelling, at which point I walk away. I always try to reason with him and talk in a calm and quiet voice. Did that this morning and he threw a basket of laundry, saying I was treating him like a child. I wasn't, I just try desperately to calm him down because our kids were home, and they shouldn't have to hear that. He will be fine for 3-4 weeks, give or take, then have a spell of irrational anger that lasts for 2-5 days.
He is on Xanax for anxiety and takes Depakote for Bipolar. I can't be positive, but I think he ran out of depakote about one week ago, although he had a 7AM appointment with his Psychiatrist this morning for his refill appointment.
We have 3.5 kids- daughter (his stepdaughter) who is almost 15, a 5yr old son and a 4yr old Autistic son. I'm due 2/22 with a girl.
He also has very little patience with our 5 yr old. Seems like he is constantly saying "no" and "don't do that", along with frequent timeouts and frequent pops on the butt or thumps to the head. I stick up for my son, which angers him more. Last night he screamed "G**Dam***" at my 4 yr old autistic son and spanked him, which is what prompted me today. He's never done that. As usual, the "punishment" didn't fit the crime....The way I see it, they are just kids being kids, testing boundaries. But when I stick up for them he FREAKS. Causes a war, right in front of them.
Anyway, I'm at a loss. No clue what to do or say to get him to see what I see, hear what I hear. I'm scared, not of him, but of me! I want to be with him because he is my love, but how much can one person deal with before they crack? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
And I apologize that this is so long.
Last edited by mod85; 12-17-2012 at 08:03 PM.