Daughter being screened~antidepressant brought on manic episode? Hope?
My daughter, 19 has had, we believe, a mental illness for some time...probably starting around age 12 or so. We thought it was just "normal" adolescent behavior, but we apparently didn't know how miserable she was...she hid a lot of her feelings, until she was in high school. Had some therapy over bad breakups w/boys. Very emotional. I then started to worry that she wasn't quite able to cope like her friends. She is extremely smart and a creative writer/poet. SAT scores were almost perfect.
She went off to college, and in her 2nd semester she had a breakdown, broke up with boyfriend (said he left because she was so miserable all the time) stayed in her dorm room in bed, missed classes, started cutting, didn't eat, started smoking pot, and eventually went to mental health services where she was diagnosed with social anxiety and depression, and was taken by ambulance to the hospital and signed into the psych unit for 5 days. She was put on Lexapro while there.
Went back to campus intending to finish up the semester, but relapsed and couldn't do it. We made her come home. Since then she has made very little, if any, progress. Continues to cut, smoke pot (until I became the police and forbid it) and sleeps poorly, is trying to form a romantic relationship (now w/a girl), and has, from what I can tell, "anxious depression."
2 weeks ago she became someone I didn't recognize...talking rapidly, happy/giggling, saying ridiculous things, making little sense, and she stayed awake for almost 4 days with about 3 or 4 hours of sleep total...went out with a friend and shopped for hours, came home, stayed up, went for a job interview the next day, and I think because she was so gregarious and "up", was hired.
This week got in to see a psychiatrist, who asked some questions (part 1 of screening) and said she most likely has bipolar disorder...my mother had it. She couldn't give her any new meds because they need to have her see the person who does the psych evaluation and prescribes meds.
The thought is that she is on a med that could have brought on the (hypo)manic episode. And she is so frightened about this diagnosis that she couldn't go to her job...I found her in her bed with slashes over almost every inch of both forearms, crying that everyone will leave her, and that she'll never be normal.
A few hours later she said she was scared to take medication that would change her personality, because she knows herself so well...and doesn't want to become boring like everyone else....!!! I began to cry when I realized what a long road is ahead...and told her "this is no life for you...at what cost do you want to remain in this dysfunctional state."
Today, she was supposed to go to work (2nd try) and my son saw her walking down the road and when we turned around she ran into the woods...he jumped out and got her to get in the car...had a mat knife, lighter, and paper towels with her.
At this point, we are waiting for part 2 of the screening and I have a good friend who is saying "good luck, you'll need it...mental illness is hell and most meds don't work" His wife has bpd. My own mother tried many meds, became a drug addict and gave up.
Our daughter has been truly difficult to live with for years and can be extremely argumentative and rage at us here at home. She is not always cooperative when it comes to taking helpful advice or with boundaries/limits, and I feel that having this diagnosis is a blessing and a curse. At least there's research on bpd...isn't it one of the oldest known mental illnesses?
Curse, because I'm afraid it will get tricky around here...she is not capable of functioning like a normal person (yet) but what is easy for her...going out with friends, dating/sex, spending money, watching shows/playing computer games, is not exactly going to get her anywhere.
I feel as though until she gets a handle on treatment, we should keep her close by...?
I would like to offer her hope and thought perhaps some on this board can give us that...what has helped/what has not?
Thanks for reading this.
Last edited by Administrator; 07-19-2013 at 04:28 PM.