 don't want open adoption anymore, feel bad
ok, please don't judge me. I can't even tell my family this. my own mother won't accept it. I had a baby in 2012 and gave her up to an amazing married couple . they were there at the birth, in fact she was at my side when I got my c section. but now I'm having mixed feelings. I realy feel okay now. I don't feel the need to get updates and pics of her. I know shes doing great. the baby was the product of a rape. and I have been still working thru the griev and loss process. maybe this is me letting go? I don't feel the need to talk to these amazing people anymore. am I horrible? I love them and always will. I now am engaged w a baby and getting married, Its hard to explain really .. I hope they understand. they said they would if I made that decision...but I still feel guilty..any ideas?
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