Today I forgot my phone number. I had to call my husband. It seems to be getting wose for me. It is not just walking into a room and forgetting what I came in for. I will be in the middle of a sentence and forget what I was saying. Or, if I am talking with someone and they respond, my response that at one time was in my brain disappears. Many times I just let converstions go on around me since I can not always keep up.
There are a lot of functions I have to go to with my husband because of his work. I go when I can. I have seen some of the same people for years and cannot for the life of me remember them. They approach me and are wonderful and I cannot ask them questions about how their life is since I don't remember. I know to them it comes off as my being uninterested in them. If they do not feel that way I myself feel rude. I hate it and my husband gets frustrated with me although he tries to understand. He will tell me that I have met this person at least 20 times and I don't remember. It does keep me from going to some of these affairs which are fun.
I know that right now I am dealing with a lot of stress and my own physical pain. My herniated discs in my neck are out again (that is the best way I can say it). So the whole side of my right upper body is one big nerve pinch and muscle pain. My husband is very ill again so I have to be the strong one. I know this affects me.
I feel so frustrated over the fact that my mind will not work like I want it to. I consider myself an intelligent woman and when I can't get that out it drives me nuts. I also know that others do not understand this and I hate to keep saying that it is this "fibro fog". Sometimes I just say that I am very tired.
One of my favorite things is reading. I will start a book and the next day have to go back and read the last part again. If I have not picked up the book for a while I have to start over. It keeps me from reading to some extent since it depresses me.
I am curious as to how many have this fog and how bad is it for you? How do you feel about it? I have many questions about it.
As I write this I am not sure that the word extent that I have used is being used in the right context. Is it extent or extant.? Arghhhh!
Hello friend. I don't think it is all fibro. I too have fibro, and I forget things, Heck, I can get up from the table to do something and there I stand wondering what in the heck I was going to do. I know it is embarressing and up setting. But I just chalk it up to sometimers and wait until it comes back if it doesn't right away well I will remember sometime later. As far as the names of freinds go that one is touchy. May be if you have pictures of them you could look at them and gently remind yourself of their name.
As far as forgetting what you were saying. Well..... I just kinda laugh and say well that train of thought just left the station<giggle>. I just don't make a big deal out of it. That way I don't make myself worse because I'm worried about forgetting stuff.
I'm sorry that you are going though such a ruff time. Just don't be too tuff on yourself. It happens to everyone with or without fibro. Relax.
i know what you are feeling. it happens to me too. i had to give up reading for several years. then i found these wonderful books by james herriot. he was a vet in the u.k. early in the 20th century. each chapter is a short story. i read him still. when i am in the fog he transports me to a gentler time.
here is a good way to handle public appearances. when someone you have forgotten comes up to you say this. well, hello! tell me all about how things are going in your life? people love to talk about themselves. this way we do not appear to have forgotten them. usually they tell you enough to spark a memory. if not, listening makes them happy. another good one is to have hubby close by to whisper their names in your ear as they come toward you.
please don't let it get you down or frustrated. i have spent years walking in circles, forgetting what i was saying, and you know what? i have found the humor in it all and laugh. i will stop midsentence, suddenly lost, burst out laughing and tell the person, well there goes that thought! we laugh and move on to something else. i figure if i forgot it, it probably was not that important, and if it is, it will return at some point.
laughter, especially at our own bizarre antics is healing. it also keeps the people who would feel sorry for me or be offended, from feeling that way. i want to be surrounded by laughter. so i start it.
having fibromyalgia is not easy. it is doable. learning to laugh at myself has made this journey interesting and fun.
peace and compassion, love and laughter,
Hangin my friend..wait a minute it will come to me...oh yes, I have the same problem. I blame a lot of it on fibro fog and my friend tells me it is just old age. Some friend huh?LOL Really I think a great deal of it is the stress you are feeling now. Yes you would have the memory lapses and forgetting the people and (oh how I hate this one) losing your train of thought in mid sentance, and forgetting a word and on and on and on. Stress just makes it all so much worse and I can tell you to not worry about it, but that would add more stress and worrying about it makes it worse.
You are in pain, and I hate to hear that, and your husband is not doing well with his lupus right now (it is lupus isn't it?). All this stress just makes the little fibro fog moments we have into big fibro fog moments and the harder we try the worse they get.
Take deep breaths, go to a quiet place and try to have a few peaceful moments. Try to picture the stress flowing out of your body. Dare I say this, remember it is what you do with the situation.
You have been such great support for me and all of us here, I hope we can be of help to you. Visit often and let us help you. I hope your hubby gets to feeling better soon.
This is one of those crosses we Fibro people have to bear. Fibro Fog for me is deadly. (As far as I'm concerned) Since I still work a full time job, staying on top of things around this office is very important to me. My boss expects me to keep up with everything. I carry a notebook to work everyday and use it for everything. The bad thing is the last 2 days, I forgot to take it out of my bag. Now, that's terrible. I forget most everything. I have gotten in trouble on my job because I can't remember whats important. I absolutely hate the fog aspect of it. I have severe Fibro, and my fog goes right along with it.
A few things you may can do....it's strictly up to you. Carry some of those post it notes around with you. Keep a pen with a string on around your neck so you will always have something to write with. Carry a personal recording device with you, they have the little ones at radio shack that you can buy for around $50, and tapes too. There may even be some now that are digital....I don't know if that's true or not.
I'm sorry about your stress, and your husbands illness. Stress plays a big factor in fogginess. I don't care what the doctor says. I hope that you find something to help you out!
All of your words have de-stressed me already. Normally I do not get upset about Fibro fog however on that day, at that time, it did.
All of your advice was helpful and do-able. Blue, your advice about asking the person to tell me about yourself was right on. People do love to talk about themselves. That one is off my shoulders and no longer a worry.
I do have post-its all over and just the other day I got something that goes on my fridge that I write down every thought or important things I might have to do. When I go back and find it is not important, I erase it. If it is an issue or something I need to do, I can act on it.
Reading has always been my rock when it came to calming me with the pure enjoyment of words. I will look up James Herriot, I am open to new authors always and short stories for me at the moment is perfect. I have a book of short stories by southern writers (my favorite). I will pick that one up tonight.
aaronon, I understand what you are going through with work. That is why I had to stop working, not that you should. I was dealing with very delicate and legal matters and could not afford to make the slightest mistake. I miss working terribly, however it is my path and there is a reason for everything. It does enable me to be there for my husband more.
Glojer, you made me laugh with your post. Yes, laughter releases so much stress. I have to get better at laughing at the situation and not taking it personally. I had to laugh at myself when I told my husband that I had to get in the dishwasher instead of the shower.
I know that since my hubby is ill there is so much going on in my mind that it has affected the fog.
If I forgot to thank any of you it is that darn fibro fog
Thank you all for your words of encouragement and ideas. I love it that we are all here for each other no matter what..that is awesome.
My mantra in these hard times I am having is going to have to be relax. If I am a mess I am not helpful to me nor my hubby.
Thanks my friends, you are all wonderful!
Peace and love, Janet
Compassion can help heal our World"
"Compassion can help heal our world"
Sorry you're struggling so hard. I just wanted to offer some reassurance from myown experience. ONe stressor is bad enough, two is worse, and three and your mind goes on vacation. You've got your hubby, the fibro and the fog. I remember when my mother was very ill, I couldn't remember anything, dropped things, forgot everything.
That alone can do a number on our minds.
Take it easy, I will pray for you,
I can't add much to what everyone else has said, other than I agree that it is so easy to label this type of thing as "fibro fog" or "lupus fog". As you know I have both illnesses, and find that sometimes I feel I am going totally doolally. With lupus I do have cns involvement so I know when I am having problems there, but it present in a different way to memory loss. Funnily enough though the bit about reading got to me as I said the exact same thing to my husband last night.
Back to what I was going to say. There are many, many other reasons for what you are experiencing and most of them will not be health related at all. For instance:-
Beginning when you're in your 20s, you begin to lose brain cells a few at a time. Your body also starts to make less of the chemicals your brain cells need to work. The older you are, the more these changes can affect your memory.
Aging may affect memory by changing the way your brain stores information and by making it harder to recall stored information. Your short-term and remote memories aren't usually affected by aging. But your recent memory may be affected. You may forget names of people you've met recently. These are normal changes.
Information is stored in different parts of your memory. Information stored in the short-term memory may include the name of a person you met moments ago. Information stored in the recent memory may include what you ate for breakfast. Information stored in the remote memory includes things that you stored in your memory years ago, such as memories of childhood.
If you know a word but can't recall it, this is usually just a glitch in your memory. You'll almost always remember the word with time. This may become more common as you age. It can be very frustrating, but it's not usually serious.
This is a serious bit for many people though - many things other than aging can cause memory problems. These include depression, other illnesses, dementia (severe problems with memory and thinking, such as Alzheimer's disease), side effects of drugs, strokes, a head injury and alcoholism.
A memory problem can be serious when it affects your daily living. If you sometimes forget names, you're probably okay. But you may have a more serious problem if you have trouble remembering how to do things you've done many times before, getting to a place you've been to often, or doing things that use steps, like following a recipe.
Sorry to have gone on an on hangin, but I do so hope this is of help. I always feel that it is best to explore other avenues and then come to our own conclusions.
So much has been going on in your life tht I think it is only normal for things like this to be happening.
Take care my friend.
I am not a medical doctor, I only speak from my own experience of the illnesses I discuss here.
Last edited by goldenwings; 07-23-2005 at 10:45 AM.
I've experienced all of these memory problems. I, too, have a very demanding job. For example, I'm the regional administrator for our New York City and Phila******a regional offices. I live and work in the Philly area, but this week I'm in NYC all week. I'm really struggling today ... can't seem to get started on anything meaningful, can't get focused, terrible brain fog. The day's been pretty much a waste as far as work is concerned. I'm even having trouble writing this. I've spent more time backspacing over my typos than anything else.
I have to say that I can remember having this terrible fibro fog before I started any meds. Actually, some of my worst bouts of the fog happened before any meds. So for me anyway, I have to blame it on the fibro. That's not to say that the meds, etc. aren't making it worse sometimes. Who knows. It makes me very self-concious at times but I have also tried to learn to laugh it off. I have always tried using humor as my first line of defense. You have to be able to laugh at yourself. As someone here mentioned earlier, it also makes those around you much more comfortable than if you let them see you get embarrassed or frustrated.
Best wishes to all of you for pain free days and lots of joy!
Hiyah Janet !
I'm new here, and this is actually my first posting on here, so bear with me if I mess up on anything, I'm trying . I do have this forgetfulness(<-spelling?), but mine is attributed to another condition I have, POTS(Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome). We call it brain fog. It feels like there is a huge brick wall in my mind, and the information I know is on the other side, but I just can't get to it. It drives me crazy, especially at school, where it usually kicks in to overdrive. I find that sometimes I can get "over the wall" if I take a deep breathe and relax, but sometimes, I just can't. Well, I hope this helped a bit! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!
Lots of Love,
i KNOW WHAT YOU ARE FEELING, i HAVE EVEN GOT MY HUSBAND TO TAKE ME TO TOWN AND BY THE TIME I GOT THERE I DID NOT KNOW WHAT I WENT FOR, SO WE CAME BACK HOME. I FORGET THINGS ALOT AND IT IS PRETTY SCARY. I JUST KEEP HOPING THINGS WILL GET BETTER.