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Old 10-19-2005, 04:47 PM   #1
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Question Shopping??

Hi everyone,

How do you all go about shopping? Food shopping has been very difficult but my husband will go with me or for me if need be. I am talking about clothes, shoes, the fun stuff. I had not been in a clothing store for a while and had to shop for a special event recently. Well, it took all my energy to go through racks and try them on. Suffice it to say I got so tired and in pain that I picked something that when I got home I thought I had lost my mind. I am going to wear it since I can not deal with returning it and shopping again.

I know this is a little off topic however, I believe that it is important. It does stress me out. Does anyone shop from cataloges? If so, which ones? How do you size? All the important questions. I am cataloge challenged.

I am very frustrated since I know I have to shop. One reason is I can not wear what I have since I have gained weight and I do not want to buy something that makes me go up a size. I also haven't shopped for almost a year.

I know that in the big scheme of things this is but a small problem.

Any suggestions would be great.

Peace and love, Hangin

This is coming from someone who was a clothing designer for 15 years, a long, long, long time ago.
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Old 10-19-2005, 05:05 PM   #2
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Re: Shopping??

Hi Hangin, at my age clothes aren't very important, but I have 2
daughters who teach school. One of them orders most all her clothes
off the internet. If they don't fit, she sends them back. The other
daughter will spend hours looking in the malls......even if I were young
and healthy, I think I would order them and take a chance they fit.
Shopping hurts me more than anything I try to do. It seems my house
always needs cleaning, meals need to be cooked, laundry done and the
list goes on. Sometimes it makes me tired to even think about all the
things I need to do. With all the things I can't do now, I thank God for
the things I can do.....I love reading your posts....I wish we were neighbors!
Bilij

 
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Old 10-19-2005, 05:15 PM   #3
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Re: Shopping??

Hi bilij,

I am with you..I am thankful for all the things I can do, no matter how small it might seem to others. Watering my flowers gives me tremendous joy, the weeds are another matter.

Wouldn't that be great if we were neighbors. We could support each other and not sweat the small stuff like cleaning, shopping, etc. Also your daughter could help me with my shopping on the internet.

Thanks for the compliment. Made me smile.

Peace and love, Hangin
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Old 10-19-2005, 05:22 PM   #4
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Re: Shopping??

Hiya Hangin,

Wow, I sure know how you feel. I am lucky - or am I? - in that shopping expeditions for me are conducted in my wheelchair as I spend a lot of time in one. I don't try anything on in store. I need a lot of space and normally end up flat out on my bed after only a short while of clothes trying on. In the majority of places, the changing rooms are too tiny anyway, with normally only one disabled access one which is always being used by a non-disabled customer. I check with the Staff to make sure that I can pay for the goods without trying the clothes on and then if they are not right for me, I can take them back. I go round and choose everything I want, then come home and try on at my leisure. I might try shoes on in a shoe shop, because I am sat down anyway but that's about all.

If I cannot reach any clothing, I get an assistant to get it for me. The majority of assistants are very helpful, but I have found it depends on what type of clothing store you go in. It shouldn't matter, but unfortunately it does. If you are over 21 and go into a young style teenage store, the looks are enough to put you off. You know the looks that say "perleese, you must be kidding, you can't wear that, you're too old". The designer stores have Staff that don't look as though they wish to break a nail, but I make them earn their money hee hee !!

I shopped from a catalogue at the beginning of the year. I ordered 4 pairs of cropped length trousers, all in the same size, and only one pair fitted. That was my extent of catalogue shopping I'm afraid. From what I have been told the thing with catalogue shopping is to order everything in your normal size and the next size up. One or the other then might fit. If that fails, then you know you need a size smaller. I believe it depends on which catalogue company you use. Also with these companies, at least you have about 14 days to try on at your leisure. You don't then have the hassle of taking the goods back yourself, the company will arrange for pick up of unwanted items.

The thing is though Hangin, if you find it too difficult to walk around you should use a wheelchair and also have the use of the assistants to help you.

Good luck my friend.

goldenwings
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Last edited by goldenwings; 10-19-2005 at 05:32 PM.

 
Old 10-19-2005, 08:04 PM   #5
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Re: Shopping??

I found a store that carries a brand which always fits, so I feel fortunate as I go with my husband, he finds my size, holds them up and I tell him if I like the outfit as they are mix and match. This way I stay in one place and he does the rest, which is great.I don't ever have to try them on for fit. It keeps my wardrobe a little more limited, but it works. I go shopping two times a year, fall and spring. For Christmas shopping for others I take advantage of all the sales and online free shipping which has actually worked really well!!

 
Old 10-20-2005, 06:20 AM   #6
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Re: Shopping??

hi hangin,
here is my way. i wear a snug top under my shirt, like a summer tank, and pants (or shorts in summer), slip off shoes, and try all the cloths on right there in the middle of the store. that way if it does not fit i simply peel it off and grab another size. my weight changed this year too. i tried the old take it to your dressing room thing. wore me out. so then i thought of this way. my daughter went with me and about died laughing at me. we had fun. i get a kick out of the odd looks i get. there i am with my cane perched atop the clothing rack, purse on the floor and a dress or whatever going on or off.
i don't care if i am in macys or walmart i do it the way that works for me.
i hate returning stuff. golden, you are amazing!
blessings to you all this crisp autumn morn.
peace,
bluelakelady

 
Old 10-20-2005, 09:25 AM   #7
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Re: Shopping??

Hangin I rarely go to the stores for clothing. I order most everything from a catalog. I don't wear very fancey clothes, my everyday attire is usually work out clothes or jogging pants or jeans. I have dress clothes when I need them, but they are usually also pants. I use to have to wear suits and dresses years ago when I worked in sales and I try to avoid that kind of dressing up anymore.

Anyway I have found a few catalogs that carry sizes that fit me well. I am short 5'2" and am overweight so I need big around the middle and short in length. So I order almost everything from those catalogs. As big a shopper as my daughter is she will also order sometimes from them. If I am just looking for some inexpensive things to exercise or goof around in I just pick up the size I know I can wear from the discount store when they are on sale, I don't try them on, I just bring them home and take them back the next time I am out.

I truely can't do the shopping thing either. I do all mine in short trips and take a list. With the holidays coming up I will order a lot of things and then will make those short trips to stores. Mostly I will give gift cards, my family LOVES them. And that is a bonus for me, not to have to shop.

Shopping takes all the energy I have, and it has to be a good fibro day before I even think of it. I don't mind the trying on so much, but nothing ever fits anymore and then you need to look some more and after a while I am worn out. The only place to try to consolidate all the looking is at a mall and I really get worn out traipsing up and down a mall. Even if it is a store I like it is usually in the middle of the 'dang' mall and I have to walk a mile to get there. The walking is always good for me, but then I have to stop and stand there to look and walk so slowly and that does the back in, big time.

Well I have gone on and on, I think you hit a nerve on the shopping thing with me, I really don't like it. Catalogs are the only way to go, yes if they don't fit or you don't like it when you get it you have to send it back, but they give you a label and the postage is worth it to me. The only thing I shop for in clothing is shoes (I really can't order shoes) are really nice dress up clothes, you know the kind that you need for a super special occasion where you have to wear nylons and the whole bit. I really sound like a 'blob' don't I, but every since I don't have to dress up or wear that darn uniform (which was another suit with a matching blouse and and neck scarf. Oh yes that was after the double breasted wool thing with the cotton blouse with the embroidery on the collar which was after the single button with the polyester high neck long sleeve blouse and skirt that had to be below your knees) I don't like dressing up if I can avoid it.

This was a great thread Hangin, don't know if I helped you much but I feel much better......he! he!.

Glojer

 
Old 10-20-2005, 02:55 PM   #8
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Re: Shopping??

Glojer, I don't know which sound worse...a trip to the mall or a ''special
occasion thing.'' I sound anti-social, but I'm not; just the thought of
dressing up and having to make small talk for an hour or two just seems
impossible today. For years I wore a starched and ironed white uniform,
polished shoes each morning and for several years a starched white cap.
I was so high energy, sometimes it seems I was another person those years.
I like who I am now....just a little old lady with a cup of hot coffee and a
good crossword to work...what a life, fibromyalgia and all!!
Glojer, what is your project you and Blue are talking about? Did I miss something?
Bilij

 
Old 10-20-2005, 05:52 PM   #9
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Re: Shopping??

No bilij you didn't miss anything, I was just saying I have lots of projects to do and I don't have the get up and go to do them. Blue said it is called a rut and I need to climb out of it and she is right. Now that I am feeling better thyroid wise and am able to hold off some of the fibro flares I hope to get my "in a rut butt" up and going to do a few things that have been lingering around my house to get done.

Amen to what you said about a hot cup of coffee only mine is a good mystery novel to read. I use to be a very social person always on the go and over volunteered for every committee at church and school. Now I just love being comfy in loose clothes and warm sweaters in my home, I don't think you are anti social.

Wow bilij I didn't think that as long as you were in your profession you would have been in the starched white uniform and cap and the white polished shoes. Now they wear scrubs in every imaginable color and pattern, there are even stores called 'Scrubs and Things' much more comfortable I would imagine.

Have a good night bilij.

Glojer

 
Old 10-20-2005, 09:02 PM   #10
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Re: Shopping??

don't worry bilij, i remember the starched uniform, polished shoes and that stiff white cap. things are so much more casual now. too bad we are both out of the loop now. giggle.
sweet dreams you all,
blue

 
Old 10-21-2005, 01:05 PM   #11
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Re: Shopping??

When it comes to shopping you all had great advice. I think I will use a combo of cataloge, going into smaller discount stores and also a wheelchair.

I was extremely social before I got fibro and at first I welcomed the solitude. I do miss some of the social activities. People bring me joy. There are some special affairs because of my hubby's work that I try to go to. It is never forced on me but it makes him happy. When I do go I enjoy it however I am exhausted after and it takes days to function. I have found that I am out of the loop in a sense but there are many world events that I love to talk about. It does takes alot of energy.

Now it is not being anti-social just another chapter in my life. My joys are many but a good book, music, a fire and my man beside me my gift from Fibro.

Goldenwings, for so long my hubby (swingman from now on) had told me he would take me anywhere and use a wheel chair. He checked out some of the larger stores and they have wheelchairs with baskets attached, this would work beautifully.

I have had my pride get in the way of using a wheelchair and after you mentioned it I got to thinking of all the places I have missed not going to. I have decided to drop this stupid pride, use the wheelchair and enjoy the things and places in life I love to do. It is so wonderful how we all can say a little thing that can change our lifes. Golden, you changed my life significantly with your kind words and suggestion.

Bilij, I also remember the crisp white uniforms. Now sometimes I do not know who is a nurse? Crossword puzzles I love, not to good at them but I figure it exercises my brain.

Take care everyone. Have a great evening.

Peace and love, Hangin
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Last edited by hangin; 10-21-2005 at 01:28 PM.

 
Old 10-21-2005, 01:32 PM   #12
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Re: Shopping??

Hiya Hangin,

You're welcome. You know I have had to use a wheelchair for many years now, so I suppose to me it is me, and I don't even think about it. My first time was when I was 16 and that was I thought then the worst thing to ever happen in my life. I need one to be able to get around and to be able to get on with my life so my wheelchair is an extension of me. I have just got a new one with super duper tyres that don't need pumping up. I do understand how you feel though.

If you have to use an ordinary wheelchair whilst you are shopping make sure you get one with large wheels, so then you can push yourself around and your lovely husband can go off an do his own thing. In large stores do be careful if you use a motorised scooter, I almost wrecked the complete store using one of those hee hee. Once was enough. I hated stopping at each aisle and shouting "beep beep" just in case anyone was passing through.

Just think though Hangin, now you will have energy left to do other things that require effort. It works out in the end you know hee hee !!

Happy shopping my friend.

goldenwings
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Last edited by goldenwings; 10-21-2005 at 03:20 PM.

 
Old 10-21-2005, 03:36 PM   #13
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Re: Shopping??

Dear Hangin and Golden, your posts got me to thinking about how foolish
false pride really is...at my age I still have a little battle with the ''old
monster''. Growing up, we were very poor and my parents took great pride in
the fact my sisters and I finished high school.This was the depression era and
many farm families saw no need in schooling. My father had so much pride he
refused any government help although we could have used the help.Somehow
without realizing it,those early years help shape who we are,both good and bad.
There have been days since I've had fibro that I would have given up had it
not been for the toughness instilled in me by my parents.
I'm old enough to be everyones mother and most often grandmother on this
board. I'm a different generation but the problems with fibromyalgia is the
same regardless of age..we hurt, we're tired and we miss the persons we once
were but in some ways we're better,we've almost conquered pride.Thanks for
making me take a new look at myself.
Bilij

Last edited by bilij; 10-21-2005 at 03:47 PM. Reason: words left out

 
Old 10-21-2005, 06:05 PM   #14
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Re: Shopping??

Another idea is the TV shopping channels. If you can't stand to sit and watch, you can always check them out on-line. Measurements are usually available (at least for the channel I work for) and when you find a line of clothes that you like and get the sizing down, the desingers usually try to keep their sizes true to their line. Also, I know the company I work with has extended returns this time of year for the holidays, so it would be a great time to try them out.

Kaz

 
Old 10-22-2005, 04:36 AM   #15
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Re: Shopping??

Hiya Kaz and welcome,

Such another good idea. I don't think that I personally ever think of things like this. Because I spend most of my time on my own and I am unable to leave my home without help, I look forward to getting outdoors. I also don't have the luxury of having a carer or anyone to take me out, so when my husband is finished with work for the weekend, I take this chance to get out and do the stores hee hee.

I must say though, here in the UK on the odd occasion I have looked into clothing programmes on shopping channels, they have been so very expensive and the posting charge is so very high. It is refreshing to find perhaps there is one out there that doesn't charge the earth.

May I just say that you have chosen such a wonderful place to be by coming here. The support you will get is tremendous. Please come back soon.

Take care.

goldenwings
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Last edited by goldenwings; 10-22-2005 at 04:40 AM.

 
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