working lady

I have had a couple of doctors mention the possibility of Fybromyalgia as an explanation for my neck and back pain, variety of muscle pains, numbness in toes. Recently I visited with a Rheumatologists and again he feels I suffer from Fybromyalgia. I did have a surgery a few years ago on my neck. I had two discs removed and a cadaver bone fusion. I always thought my pain came from the surgery. I think I did not want to hear Fybromyalgia because many interpret the pain as being psychosamatic. I do take pain killers and muscle relaxers. The muscle relaxers are also to help me sleep at night as the Rheumatologists does not think I have very good sleep patterns. I have been told I must avoid stress. I have been through phyical therapy because the muscles in my back, neck, hips were so tight I was often plagued not so much by severe pain but a gnawing pain. The type that just slowly wears on you. In turn this pain would make me feel depressed that I was not feeling as well as I thought I should. The physical therapists told me that all of my muscle problems were caused by stress and I needed to find ways to get rid of it. The therapists were quite impressed with the mass of knotted muscle I had produced.

Now that I have begun to accept that I may in fact suffer from Frybromyalgia another question has come to mind. I wonder if this is not just a part of depression. My life is not stress free not at work or at home. I have been married for 21 years. I don't like to think that I am depressed because I have real reasons for my stress/depression. I know that trying to cope with my life the way it is, is killing me. How do I know if it is depression and should you seek help for depression if in fact there are valid reason for the depression.