How do you explain this to little children? - Fibromyalgia Message Board

DunkinNut · 02-16-2008, 01:16 PM

Since I was officially diagnosed a few weeks ago (sort of informally about 3 years ago) I have been keenly aware of how often I say to my wonderful, awesome, health little boy about why mommy always says, "I don't feel good", "don't touch me there - that hurts", "mommy's back hurts"....I feel that is all I ever say to the poor little guy. For those of you that have younger children - what do YOU say to them? My 13 year old and my 23 year old can only SORT of grasp it. Heck, it's hard for adults to understand, isn't it? But I had a "sickly" mother and I so, so, so didn't want my kids hearing me complaining of pain....and yet, here I am.

HELP. DN

kirstee · 02-16-2008, 03:15 PM

There is no way to communicate chronic pain to your little guy. Maybe with time, you will have the right words to give him so that he understands better. One of the biggest difficulties in having FMS is friends and family members who don't "get it" and probably never will. There are feelings of loss that come with losing the "old you" that everyone is grieving over - including you. My best advice is DON"T FEEL GUILTY! The silver lining in this cloud is that you are learning compassion for others in a way most people never learn. Did your mother have FMS also?

Blessings,
Kirstee

Backinthesaddle · 02-17-2008, 06:53 AM

My little boy is only 2.5 yrs old. But when I really hurt I tell him mommy doesn't feel good right now. I tell him my arms hurt. He has seen his dad massage my arms and he also comes up and massages my arms and back (it is to cute for a 2yr old). Sometimes he jumps on my back and holds onto my neck (had 3 surgeries on it) and I freek a bit and tell him I have a bad neck. I just tell him the truth. He sees me in pain when I sit on the floor with him and go to stand up. I just do not let it get in the way of our having fun.