I am 3 weeks post op from a Left heel osteotomy and am having alot of depression or is it just plain feeling sorry for myself. I have been lashing out at the husband for little things that shouldn't matter. Want to cry all the time and feel like I am all alone in this. I hate being in pain, hate feeling helpless, I hate sitting here not contributing to anything. I get that others get sick and tired of waiting on you but how do you stop feeling so horrid? I am the one that is usually the care giver not the other way around. Is it possible that your loved ones get to a point that they want to **** you off enough to release them from having to care for you needs any more? I think thats what is happening. I have weeks to go and don't know what to do.
I'm sorry you feel down in the dumps. I know how you feel as it's happened to me a few times in my life with lower body injuries. Including right now.
If it makes you feel any better I'm one week into being in a hard cast for a broken foot and I'm already irritable with the fiance. It's frustrating not being able to do my normal activities. I can't play ice hockey, I can't play soccer, hell, I can't even mow the lawn and it makes me angry and depressed. All because I planted my foot awkwardly while playing soccer. I'm very active and I'm chomping at the bit to out and do something but I can't and that's very frustrating. Instead I'm stuck playing video games or watching TV. Fun.
I can't stand being so immobile and I feel down in the dumps as well with a general feeling of uselessness. I've broken many bones but by far the worst to affect me mentally have been my kneecap and now my foot. Lower body injuries keep you down and out of your normal life much more so than say a hand or arm. You can still walk around and such with upper body injuries.
So, yes, I believe it's normal and it will fade as you get more mobile. At least it always has for me. But try to go easy on your husband. He has to do your chores now as well so it's harder on him.
I guarantee he doesn't want to stop taking care of you. I'm sure he does get annoyed with you from time to time but that will happen to anyone having to take on more responsibilities that their partner used to take care of.
I already told my fiance I don't need her help because I was feeling the same as you. Now I just get up off the couch and hop on one leg to the kitchen to get a drink or food. It entertains her as well to see me hopping all around the house trying to do chores and such.
Changing kitty litter in an upstairs room and changing out a car battery are quite difficult chores with a broken foot you can't put any weight on. But I managed. :-) Made me feel better too!
I am 8 weeks post op from a joint fusion in my right big toe joint. I will have a total of 12 weeks nwb before this is done, then another 4 weeks in a walking boot. You are only 3 weeks into it and i remember feeling somewhat the same way. Luckily i have a husband who is very thick skinned so didn't take my moods personally. It DOES suck to be helpless, like you, i have always done everything for everyone and now i'm stuck doing nothing except sitting on my *** everyday. I'm also used to working out everyday and am getting very stiff and uncomfortable not being able to workout. I don't know about you, but i was in pain for so many years that my attitude right now is that i will reluctantly put up with this immobility and helplessness if it means i'll walk soon pain free. Try and look at it that way, that's about all you can do. And remember it's peoples nature to get on with THEIR lives, no one is sitting around thinking about poor you, so try and get over your feelings of exclusion and think of a better future with healthy feet. Do you have a "Roller Aid". It's a scooter type thing you rest your knee on in place of crutches and can roll around the house. It works great in the kitchen so you can at least get your own water or food if no one is home with you. Your doctor can tell you where you can rent one and your insurance will hopefully cover it.
Keep your chin up, things do get easier. :0)
walleye, I'm so sorry you are having a tough time right now. You really have been through it over the last year so IMO you are entitled! I found that the pain meds that I was on post-op contributed a lot to my moods, but we have to take them. I'm thinking our mood would be a whole lot worse if we were in pain.
It probably doesn't help you at all to hear that what you are feeling is normal, but it really is. I remember getting sooo mad at my husband and it was ridiculous because he always helped me and never complained. I think I was just mad because he was HAVING to help me and then I stupidly felt like he was acting like a martyr every time he did anything. The poor guy- no matter what he did he was wrong. I know I gave him hell some of the time and you know what? I ENJOYED it .
So, see, you aren't the only b**** on this board!
It did get better and my husband didn't leave me or anything!
Hang in there walleye. I am going to add that I think the depression is normal too. I am the one who "does it all" in my house too. Knowing that the surgery will fix things eventually can be your light at the end of the tunnel. You had the surgery to improve the quality of the rest of your life...this is just a "bump in the road". I know you are from MN too so maybe no watching the news for you? All that flood coverage is so sad and you need some fun! Rent a comedy or something? It will get better.
walleye, you are totally normal. and your loved ones will still love you. there were days when my hubby would come home to me sobbing...."i'm so hot and uncomfortable" (my triple arthrodesis was over the summer!). but he helped when he could and so did my friends. they knew what i was going thru was hard and stuck by me.
hang in there, it gets better....but may get worse first. long recovery but when you see the first glimmer of hope (like going in a walking boot) you feel so much better and happier.
i used the phrase "i am so sick of being in pain" about 100 times during recovery.
Wow, Thanks everyone. I really thought I was going to have to call the doctor and request anti-depressants thinking that those would make me a nicer person. Nice to know that I'm fairly normal. It sounds like most of us that have to be confined for long periods of time go thru this. Wow, I really don't want to be this way because I haven't wanted for anything except to get out once and a awhile participate in making meals cleaning up just anything to be useful. This is where I get hollered at. I need to do something.
I do have a knee walker and love it. I took over the kitchen tonight and made Chicken with Brocolli Fettichinni Alfredo, Hubby came home and asked what the **** I thought I was doing. My answer: making myself feel good so please leave me along I will asked if I need help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dinner was great, I didn't hurt, and I felt wonderful. I let them clean up. I know I have to be be very careful and will, but I feel I can make dinner once in awhile. I have at least another 4 to 6 weeks NWB.
I will be playing the WII starting this week. I tried earlier and the drugs didn't make my co-ordination do very good. Now that I'm not taking so many I can try again. Thank you all I can't tell you how much it means to me!!
Ok a question: Yesterday I was up more than other days. I felt good. Went to work for 1 hour had my foot down about half the time there then rest of the time with it on the knee walker. Down to go to Walmart, used a motorized cart there for 1/2 hr, down again to get back home. The foot didn't hurt much at all, couldn't feel any swelling. Put it up when I got home for about 1 hr then used the knee walker to stand at the kitchen counter to trace and cut a pattern for about 45 minutes. Start hurting sat down. Had it down after dinner sitting at the kitchen table. Ok so I go to bed, took my pain meds, it felt like someone was cutting into my heel bone. Even though I had the foot up on 2 pillows it was super tight in the air cast, let out some of the air, took off the top part (starting having a panic attack,yeppie), this went on til 2am. The pain wouldn't go away no matter what. Is this whats suppose to happen everytime you put the foot down for a while? They should hand out what to expect books when they do surgery on us. I do know today if I put the foot down I get stinging and tingling and pain. So whats going on???????????????????????????
So I have had the foot up above the heart most of the day. It for some reason is really painful today it hasn't let up since last night. Today was my day to cut bad on the pain meds and ween myself off them. Is it too early? Is there anywhere out there that is some what of a guide to all this. Whats ok pain, whats not, when to cut the meds back and when, should you bug the doc when your not sure whats going on? I understand everyone is different but doing this by the seat of my pants doesn't feel right either. But then I don't want to feel like an idiot and call if its normal healing. Man this is hard. Ya I'm one of those that needs to know the why's and what's of how things work.
Yes this is hard.......extremely hard to go thru. I would have a few good days and then BAM a bad one and it would get me down. The pain does not go away completely for a LONG time. I made a few calls to the doc and he never made me feel silly for calling. If it makes you feel better to talk to your doc then call in. Better to be safe than sorry. But having been thru it...I can say that it sounds normal to me....unfortunately. Are you icing?????
I've been reading this thread. I don't know much about your ankle issue...but I just want you to know that you are not alone with your "up and down" pain...feeling depressed...and not knowing what is appropriate pain and what isn't...and not really knowing how much calling your doctor is appropriate, etc. I am with you on all of this!! I decided to go into counceling b/c I am getting really down (and NOT myself at all....I need help to deal with this) AND...I started acupressure. That has helped me A TON with my anxiety and feeling helpless and scared. It's OK....to need the know the "whys"and "whats" of how things work!!! It's your body and you have every right to ASK AS MANY QUESTIONS as you need to ask your doctor!!! (I have a list of 40 questions that I'm bringing for my post-op follow-up appointment tomorrow). You are in my thoughts...and you are not alone with this journey!!
Let Me Walk!
hurts2walk, I haven't iced but the first day. I have RSD in that foot and ice sets it off. Just alot foot above the heart. I haven't had alot of swelling, just occassionally for no reason. I suppose that it is part of healing. It is so nice to have so many out here that can understand thanks.
Let me walk, thank you. Hope your post-op visit goes well. I'm not as depressed as last week, I think what helped is doing a couple of things that made me feel useful and I got out of the house. Ya it hurt some but was way worth it. I believe we are all creatures of of inviroment, our moods tend to be based on the weather, cloudy depressing, sunny, we feel happier. Living in MN in spring time is cloudy, gray, and brown doesn't help the mind set.
I still haven't figured out this pain thing. Will give it til next Monday and if it hasn't changed I will call the doc's office.
I'm two weeks post op after fusion of big toe. Took Percocet for about 4 days and now just take extra strength Tylenol when I feel I need it. I have been told to stay off foot completely for 4 weeks. My doc admits that this may be more then what is needed, however experience has shown him that it is worth it and shows better results. Everyone is different, but I am happy to go this route. I have been doing exercises with every part of my body without putting any weight on my foot. This I believe has helped with total circulation and strength in general. I lightly massage the foot that was operated on. Gently touching the toes, around the sides and underneath the foot as well as the ankle and leg. Might be something you want to try. My doc says this is ok for me as long as I don't stand or walk on the foot/leg. Hope you are feeling better soon.