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Old 04-16-2009, 06:53 AM   #1
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toe deformity anxiety-help

hi, I am just wanting some anonymous advice about an issue I have. I was born with deformed toes, otherwise perfectly normal(??), I have hidden these since I was about 10, except from long term partners and one friend, who is great and encourages my to 'come out' so to speak, however anytime I have thought someone might see them I get an amazing sense of anxiety overcome me, almost panick. i am now 30 and hate hiding this and stopping doing things ie watersports, having shoes off the summer in front of friend etc but can't seem to overcome this fear. It may sound stupid, but 20 years of hiding something is not so easy to overcome. I would appreciate anyones advice, opinions or help on what I could do and how I can get over this almost ridiculous and very superficial fear?????

 
Old 04-16-2009, 11:08 AM   #2
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Re: toe deformity anxiety-help

What do you mean "deformed toes?" Are they just unusually long or do they bend or something? I have two that tend to be very crooked - one on each foot. Bu tno one really notices them.

 
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Old 04-16-2009, 12:46 PM   #3
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Re: toe deformity anxiety-help

Toe deformity is heredity, may happen several generations down from someone with the problem.

I have overlapping toes, one shorter than the others, one drops down, little toes overlap next toes. I was the unlucky one to inherit the genes from way back when. It does make it harder to get shoes wide enough in the toe section and still fit in the heel.

I have 5 children, 3 girls and 2 boys. Guess what, the girls have toe deformities and the boys do not. In other words, it appears the gene is passed from mother to daughters.

I have always been a barefoot kid, does not bother me for anyone to see my toes, same with my daughters.

If you think about it, my toe deformity is no worse than some people with the toe next to the big toe being much longer than the big toe. They too go barefoot, wear sandles and it does not bother them.

I plead with you to come out and enjoy life because toe deformity is nothing to hide.

 
Old 04-19-2009, 04:13 AM   #4
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Re: toe deformity anxiety-help

Hi, thanks for replying. My right foot is almost normal, just 2nd toe bends a little to the right, over 3rd toe. But the left foot is an extreme of the right. Middle toe is half the size of the fourth toe and 2nd toe bends right over the 3rd toes...pretty obvious! How do you mean crooked with your feet?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Titchou View Post
What do you mean "deformed toes?" Are they just unusually long or do they bend or something? I have two that tend to be very crooked - one on each foot. Bu tno one really notices them.

 
Old 04-19-2009, 04:27 AM   #5
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Talking Re: toe deformity anxiety-help

Hi, thank you for replying...you have an inspirational ending to your reply! Yours sound very similar to mine....without seeing them. I have looked on the net and can't find anything that looks like mine.
I know it can be hereditary...i remember my mother saying when I was very young that it came from my fathers side of the family.
I was a bare foot kids for half my childhood. My sister used to call me names like spastic toes and give me grief. Whether it may be subconscious, I don't know, but I certainly don't feel like I blame her for my insecurities.
I am married and we are trying to strat a family. Interesting you say your girls have the same. Did you fear it at their birth?? I feel that will be the first thing I look at when we have our babies... I don't want to be disappointed in the moment. Do you ever consider getting surgical correction for your children?? My mother never did that I know of...guess she thought I was perfect as I was...as you do with your own children. And you never had the fear instilled into you to not be yourself, I praise and admire you for that.
I work with children who are far far worse off than me, craniofacial children missing half a face! Which is why I feel so stupid to feel the way I do. I thank you for pleading with me to come enjoy life....that is what I want, for all I know we olny get one. I just need courage and have no idea where to find it. So stupid. My head know all the right things, my heart is a little f%*&^% up!!! You sound lovely, can relate and insiring. Hope you keep in contact. Thank you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Misty800 View Post
Toe deformity is heredity, may happen several generations down from someone with the problem.

I have overlapping toes, one shorter than the others, one drops down, little toes overlap next toes. I was the unlucky one to inherit the genes from way back when. It does make it harder to get shoes wide enough in the toe section and still fit in the heel.

I have 5 children, 3 girls and 2 boys. Guess what, the girls have toe deformities and the boys do not. In other words, it appears the gene is passed from mother to daughters.

I have always been a barefoot kid, does not bother me for anyone to see my toes, same with my daughters.

If you think about it, my toe deformity is no worse than some people with the toe next to the big toe being much longer than the big toe. They too go barefoot, wear sandles and it does not bother them.

I plead with you to come out and enjoy life because toe deformity is nothing to hide.

 
Old 04-19-2009, 05:40 PM   #6
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Re: toe deformity anxiety-help

When I was a child, my middle toes ( one on each foot) were so crooked that a good part of each 3rd toe was under the 2nd toe. My father called me "crooked toe) and would overlap the crooked one on top the 2nd straighter one. I could not wiggle my toes enough to uncross them! I would have to do it manually. Now, just the one on my left foot is still crooked and it's not as bad as it was. It's never really bothered me and no one else has ever really noticed it.

 
Old 04-20-2009, 05:36 PM   #7
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Re: toe deformity anxiety-help

I have a toe-deformity, too. On both my feet, my 4th toe UNDERLAPS my 3rd toe. It doesn't really cause me anxiety, per say...but there are times when it causes pain and numbness, especially on my right foot. It makes it challenging to find proper fitting shoes...as I need a wider toe box, but a narrower midfoot and heel area. I also have to keep my nails trimmed very short, because any kind of nail growth causes irritation and rubbing on the underlapped toes.

 
Old 06-10-2009, 12:46 AM   #8
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Re: toe deformity anxiety-help

Hi,i've simlar problem since i was little!My second toes in both feet are overlapping all the time,on top of the big toes and 3th toes.They overlapp also when i'm standing,without shoes,and i don't like!When you see my sole,it's like i've four toes!!If i wiggle my toes and i try to put the second toes in a right position they are sqeezed between the big and the other toes,because there isn't space,and start to overlapp the 4th toes!
Immediately when i move my feet the second toes flip up again on top!
Sometimes i've try to spread this toes with toes spacer ,but they was unconfortable,and walking the fourt toes wanted to ride the third,in a worse situation!!The problem is when i whear shoes,because the second toes rub strongly on top of the shoes,and under is painfull becase rubbing on the adiacents toes!!....Sometimes i wanted to cut my second toes!!!
In office under the desk i don't wear the shoes because i've to wiggle my toes costantily pushing down the second toes,....i know that isn't elagant but i feel my toes unconfortable!!!I like the summer because i can wear open toes shoes, and i can wiggle my toes!
Someone with similar experience can post the solution??I need surgery???
I can see that i'm not the only one, i've meet other girls and woman with toes like mine!!!It's because now i'm 33yold and my situation is worse because i'm getting also bunions on both feet and my big toes curl inward,now touching 3th toes.....
Thanks for reading this text!!

 
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