Re: Am i doing the right thing?
You should have your husband come read these boards! Let him read first-hand the struggles we patients go through! Many of the stories had me freaking out a bit as my first surgery approached but you have to realize that all surgeries can have complications but they also have so many successes, too. If the were all failures, they'd stop doing the surgeries! Also, many of the people who have had successes are not here on the boards anymore, they're out functioning and living their pain-free lives. There are many of us, our stories are just not as frequent on the board.
Back to taking care of your husband... first of all, YOU come first. If you can't do things, you don't do them. Period. Doctor's orders. It's nearly impossible to even get up to move with one foot being done, let alone two! A wheelchair is to help you get from place to place, not to help you do housework. Dude is going to have to accept the fact that he's gonna have to step it up for a few months and get the cooking/housework done himself for a while. It may not be up to your standards and he'll complain about about it but tough patooties. Your recovery trumps all of that. You cannot do those things, even with equipment to assist your mobility. You will not have the physical or emotional strength or energy to do it. In the next couple months, he needs to start re-conditioning his mind set and maybe even learning how to do the things that you do so that he is not in total shock when the time comes for hime to take over.