My son had a couple of screws and bolts placed into his ankle and feet bones due to reconstructive surgery and didn't have any problems other than the bones did not heal correctly and it had to be re-done. What kind of problems or help do you need that your talking about?
I mean, people are like "oh, bummer" or "that sucks" when I tell them. The same they would act if I broke my thumb. I'm helpless and no one offered to help me. I'd assumed people I've helped over the years would help me get through this.
While I'm fortunate to have an immediate family that understands the severity of my ankle surgery and are willing to help, I know what you mean. Nobody seems to realize how traumatic these surgeries are and how hard it is to recover. It seems to be no big deal to people.
I agree with demogoat, you need to speak up. I think people just have no idea. I hope you get help and the sympathy that you deserve right now. (((hugs)))
[QUOTE=Gleek;4087686]I mean, people are like "oh, bummer" or "that sucks" when I tell them. The same they would act if I broke my thumb. I'm helpless and no one offered to help me. I'd assumed people I've helped over the years would help me get through this.[/QUOTE]
With my son, which is disabled and does have staff, so the help was there, but......I had to constantly remind them that he can not just jump back up and do things normal, such as walk. He had a surgery a year before that, same foot, but not the hardware at that time and because staff and actually a PT therapist would not listen to me, they pushed him up way sooner than recommended and that is why he had to have repeated surgery and the hardware placed in his foot. Pushing too quickly can cause problems, they need to know that.
So I suggest you let the people around you know that, everyone heals differently and that you want to make sure that it heals correctly so you do not have to repeat this again and that you need all the help you can from them. Drop hints, or come right out and say "I don't want to inconvenience anyone(sarcastically), but if they were in your shoes that you would help them and you would appreciate the same from them. I wish you the best...
I agree that unless you've had ankle issues, you don't really "get it". I found that most people don't really know what a pain crutches are. I had to remind people how hard it is to do basic stuff, like carry a cup of coffee, or do laundry. I can switch the loads, but how do you get the laundry back to the closet when both your hands are on crutches?
I think the others are right in that you need to ask for help and be specific. Not many people realize that when your ankle is injured, and you are NWB, that your hands are no longer able to do what they usually do because they are acting as your feet!
I agree with the others - you probably need to ask for help. Make a list of things you need help with - laundry, changing sheets, grocery shopping, minimum cleaning (light dusting, vacuuming, clean bathrooms), meals, rides to appointments, taking out trash/recycling, picking up mail/mailing bills, walkingfeeding the dog. Find reliable people who will do those things without expecting something in return - the last thing you need to worry about is getting "even" with people.
I had no idea how much help I would need after I had foot surgery in August, but luckily my family and friends did. They all told me what I would need and they each volunteered for different things. That way, nobody was with me full time and it didn't really take much time out of their lives. I gave them each a key to my house because I couldn't walk down the steps to let them in, and sometimes I just slept through their visits/chores. My best friend came over every Sunday night to take out my recycling/trash, clean litter boxes and drop off a few groceries (I didn't have much of an appetite). She also brought over dinner for the two of us so I had one great meal each week! I have to tell you it was such a relief to not worry about any of those things. I just needed to rest and let my body heal itself.
I'm able to get around now and am back to work part time. I told my helpers not to get too comfortable because I'm having surgery on my other foot in December!
While I was fortunate also.. I had my daughter living with me and my husband took family leave because (DR advised me No weight baring)... Hurt like hell to walk anyway!
I do sympathize with you.. Some people just don't understand unless they have gone through something like this.. but its time you asked for their help!