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Old 02-02-2010, 12:50 PM   #16
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Thanks Kris.
I saw my physio today who says just 3 months after surgery the hospital are unlikely to do anything anyway as it's too soon. They want to wait at least anothre 3 months before they even think about scanning it again.
I have my 3 month review on Monday so I'll kick off a bit then as I've no other choice.
I just hate it when everyone looks at me like they're an authority on my condition and I'm just the patient so what could I know? The truth is that this condition is common but rarely treated to the point of surgery so it seems to me the reason I'm largely getting no answers is because no one has any but won't admit it.
My physio seems to look doubtful when I tell her the pain has increased since surgery and certainly worsened in the last 2 weeks. She says she believes me but doesn't look like she does. She says my scar isn't hot, red or swollen anymore like it was in the weeks after my op so therefore there can't be anything much wrong. I strongly disagree but I just don't think anyone is very interested.
I wouldn't be so concerned but back in 2008 when no one really knew what was wrong and everyone at the hospital was keen to write me off with all sorts of minor problems. I had this acid pain and insisted it needed looking into and demanded that I had an ultrasound scan as MRI's are useless for this type of problem. I was looked at like I was a lunatic but I was right and eventually had surgery.
I was right then when they were all wrong and I think I'm right again now. Surely I'm the best person qualified to know how much pain I'm in?
I had the same surgery on my right foot first and never had this acid pain again once the op was done but it's constant in my left foot. I'm so frustrated no one seems to be bothered.
The problem definately isn't scar tissue. I had a ton of it removed when I had surgery in November.
I guess I'll have to take it up with whoever I see at fracture clinic on Monday.
Thanks again for your help.
Fluffy. xx

Last edited by fluffy999; 02-02-2010 at 12:54 PM. Reason: more info added

 
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Old 02-02-2010, 06:43 PM   #17
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

From my experience from my last 3 surgeries, all including the peroneal tendons, they won't do a scan or anyting until at least 6 mos post op. They just won't. I guess they have to wait that long to see how the healing is going. So, give it the 3 mos, keep complaining and then maybe at 6 mos they'll order the scan to see what is going on.
I've known others who have had problems with the peroneals and had multiple surgeries on them besides me. They are a pain in the behind for sure. I know how hard it is to wait. I was in tears and each time my dr. just said, I'll see you in 6 weeks. Finally, at about 7 mos I called him a pitched a fit because he kept saying 6 more weeks and then I'd see him again, complain and then it was 6 more weeks. At 9 mos he finally started to listen and at 10 mos I had the surgery. So, know that until 6 mos post-op., they really won;t do anything, but then at 6 mos, they'll start to listen, at 9 mos, they'll listen with more interest and at 12 mos, they'll really start paying attention. BUt keep complaining so they have it in the records.
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Old 02-03-2010, 03:24 PM   #18
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

I too was told they could not do another scan for 6 months after the surgery. My Dr. gave the reason that the tendon would show it was torn even if it wasnt because of it healing during that time. He did go ahead and give me another MRI right at 6 months and it was torn hence my 3rd surgery. MY issue now is because of all the surgeries and screws they cant see the tendon if it is torn. I go back in March and decide if the screws come out to take a better picture. My guess is going to be yes they are coming out. I am still in pain and it is not getting any better. The thought of a 4th and possibly 5th surgery is really depressing. I have 3 kids and all surgeries have been over the summer months because I work for a school, The surgeries have been as hard on them as me. Has either of you had screws removed? It is such a struggle everyday to try and figure out what to do. I am only 39 and to think of walking in pain for the rest of my life is crazy!

 
Old 02-04-2010, 01:30 AM   #19
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Thanks again for all your replies. You really are a help!

Heidi, I haven't had any screws put in so don't have this problem but it wouldn't surprise me if I need more surgery that will involve somethin like it so I'll keep you posted.

I can understand the need to wait for 6 months post-op before anything will be even looked into but the frustration is killing me. I just know I'm right about something being wrong and it seems such a waste of time. I've already watsed so much time listening to them say "Let's try laser traetement - Let's try steroid injections - Let's try 3 months of physio."

Kris - I'm totally with you on the 6 week thing. I got so fed up when I was first diagnosed with being told they'd see me in 6 weeks. I'd wait for an appointment which didn't come so had to spend ages on the phone hounding them for one. Then it would arrive and I'd have to wait 4 weeks to see someone. Then I'd get all geared-up that when I went someone would do something only to find when I got there I'd have a minor poke-about to be toldto come back again in another 6 weeks! In the end I kicked-off and said to the bloke I saw each time - "You do know I'm aare that two lots of 6 weeks is 3 months? Calling it weeks doesn't make me think it's any less. I'm not stupid you know. What's going to change between now and then other than my condition getting worse? DO SOMETHING!!!"
Ar which point he scuttled off and got a surgeon and then I was finally put on the waiting list. I resent having to cause such a scene to get anything done. It's hard here in the UK because we gave a National Health Service. I know alot of the rest of world thinks we're lucky because that means we don't pay for anything but we do - we get an onscene amount of money taken from our wages every month in National Insurance contributions to pay for the NHS and when you need it you have to threaten to kill someone to get something done which we pay heavily for.

Back on topic though. I just know so much time has already been wasted. July 2007 I first noticed soemthing was wrong and it was January 2009 before I had my furst op. I just think now that we know the problem they should get on with it. Haven't we all suffered enough??? Arrgggghhhhhh!!!

I'm calm now I promise....
I'll have a chat with whoever I see at fracture clinic next week. My hopes aren't high though. I know they'll say they can't do anythig until 6 months is up and I suppose that is sensible. The point is when I go back when 6 months is up they'll try and fob me off with crap and I'll have to complain yet again and the whole cycle of everything I've been through twice already qill begin again.

Much love to you all. Let's keep going !!!

Fluffy. xx

 
Old 02-08-2010, 11:29 AM   #20
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Hi everyone.

I went to the hospital today for my 3 month review.
As expected, I have to go back in another 3 months as it's too soon after surgery to tell what's a genuine problem and what's healing etc. Fair enough.
One thing I did get straight though - AT LAST!!! - is that my days standing on my feet all day at work are O.V.E.R. Doc says as I've had the condition so long (which is uncommon apparently) it's unlikely that after all my treatments and 2 surgeries, that I'll ever be free of pain completely and I might want to seriously reconsider what I do for a living (currently Retail Managment). I would do well to find something where I can move around regularly to stop my joints and tendons seizing up but which also allows me to sit down for a large part of my shift. Standing on my feet all day must become a thing of the past.
I feel good. Which I know may sound odd. But at least it's a little bit of closure. I've been wanting someone to find the balls to tell me where I stand - if you'll pardon the pun - for ages and now at least I'm a bit better informed of what to do about things in the long term.
Doc says I could possibly have more surgeries in the future but not on a regular basis - not that I'd want them too aften! - but it's almost certainly something I'll have to live with long term and I might want to start really adapting to my condition. I expected this and actually feel quite positive that at least now I know and I can either be open to further treatment if it's available whilst also not continue sitting around waiting for someone to tell me what I pretty much already knew anyway! this is a good thing I think.

Also, to anyone suffering the same, or similar condition, - and I know you're out there cos you're either reading this or have kindly responded along the way - I was told today that I might benefit from seeing a Podiatrist and maybe having custom made insoles made for my shoes to put my feet at a slight angle without the stress of wearing heels (I don't like the idea of heels these days!). I'm a trainer girl and wearing such flat shoes is stretching my tendons and possibly making my condition more painful than it needs to be. I'm going to talk with my doctor more in 3 months time when I go back.

Positive result I reckon. Defo feeling a little brighter! How is everyone else? please do post and let me know.

Hugs.
Fluffy. xx

 
Old 02-08-2010, 03:15 PM   #21
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

fluffy,

Finally some answers! I mean, really, you must definitely be in a better mood! I am happy for you that you finally got what you were looking for. As for me is you want an update (its too long for me to post here) you can go to my new thread "survived ankle arthroscopy." Yes, I survived! I had my procedure Wednesday and I'm going to see my surgeon for my first post-op appointment tomorrow. Keep updating!

thefrosh

PS: Too much snow! We just had a storm this weekend giving us almost two feet and now there's another one coming tomorrow evening that's gonna give us another foot! Ugh! I just figured I'd let you know! :P
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Old 02-08-2010, 07:55 PM   #22
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Hi all,
I can truly relate to what you've been going through. Had surgery on my peroneal and posterior tibial tendons in May 2007. Things were healing well when I reinjured the peroneal tendons and had surgery again in October 2007 All was going great until I turned my ankle in August 2009 and tore and dislocated the peroneal tendons and tore one of the ligaments. So, on January 26, I had my 3rd surgery where the dr took a piece of tendon, sewed it to the peroneal tendons, sewed the tendons to the ligament and then anchored it all with screws into my fibula and calcaneus bones. The pain has been much worse this time around. I can't take any of the hardcore pain meds so I've been taking Tylenol with codeine and prescription Ibuprofin every 3 hours. It doesn't make me pain free but it takes the edge off enough to be tolerable. I forgot what a pain in the neck it is trying to get around on one foot. I have 2 more weeks nonweightbearing, 4 weeks in the boot and then 4 plus weeks of physical therapy. I live in NJ too and the snow has definately made traveling to dr appts hard. Had my staples out this past Friday and my podiatrist has strongly recomended that I not be on my foot for hours at a time. I'm a medical assistant and part of my job is to do the clinical end of things which requires standing on my feet for long periods of time. So, I've been in touch with my office manager about stopping the clinical work. I'm hoping that this is the end of needing surgery but my doc has said that my ankle will always be weak and that I have arthritis setting in. Please continue to post everyone, it really does help knowing that there are others out there going through the same torture I am.

 
Old 02-10-2010, 12:02 PM   #23
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Hi everyone.

Thefrosh - I'm so glad your surgery went well and you feel ok. I know you were feeling nervous but I told you you'd be ok didn't I??? Well done you. Been there and I know it's hard, as we all do here it seems. Let's hope you're really on the mend soon. Big squishes (that's a Brit term for hugs).

Ladyabby - Ouch. You've been through a really hard time the last few years. Sounds like it's been tough. I send you good wishes and hope you're doing ok.

I certainly do feel brighter about things but the pain today has had me climbing the walls. I'm seeing my GP on Monday so I'm going to push him for some stronger painkillers. Codeine just isn't enough anymore! Maybe some Jack Daniels to wash them down with might do it?!
On the down side - the pain in my right foot is increasing again. Since I had surgery in January 2009 it's been steadily improving but I've noticed it's coming back though in a different way than pre-op. It used to be the acid burn I have in my left but since I had the op that's gone and has recently been manifesting itself as a dull ache which is now giving way to a stabbing pain along the outer side of my foot. Very painful but I'll discuss it at my next appointment as maybe I'm just putting my weight through it at a bad angle as I'm still favouring my left foot. Fingers crossed it's nothing.
I was wondering - has anyone thought of getting rid of their crutches and buying themselves a nice walking stick? I know that feels like it's a very permenant thing but I'm considering it. Maybe I'm starting to accept that I may be stuck with my condition for a long time.
Honestly, this foot business is a full-time job for us all!

Take care everyone.
Much love, Fluffy. xx

 
Old 02-11-2010, 02:38 PM   #24
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Dear Fluffy,

Whilst I haven't experienced your particular surgery issues, I have lived with the consequences of various orthopedic surgeries for my entire lifetime (I'm 37). Not just the physical consequences, but the emotional and mental ones as well. Surgeries, whatever the circumstances and outcomes are highly stressful life events. In addition, I've also experienced complications related to pain management, post-op infection, nerve damage, scar tissue, and so on. Some, but definitely not all of these outcomes are also complicated by the fact that I have hemiplegic Cerebral Palsy, where my left side and gait is affected more than my right side. At one point, I calculated that I've logged more time as a patient than most 4th year medical students, in terms of physical therapy, rehabilitation, OR time, etc. I'm a 'veteran' of nine different surgeries under general anaesthetic (six of them orthopaedic).

As a general note in relation to pain management-ice, compression and elevation can help. As can heating pads and massage (not massage of the affected area, but massaging the area just above the knee on the affected leg can help the lower extremity's circulation and relaxation).

I can't stress enough how important maintaining open communication with your G.P. is. Likely, they may know more than you might think, and if they don't, then they should be able to refer you to someone who does. They are your first contact point, and at the least, you should feel confident in them to act as your first and best advocate in this.

Is your pain medication regimen subject to regular review?. Have you documented and discussed with your medical team what has made your pain worse and what might have made it better (for all types and at all stages of your pain)?. If your pain isn't being properly managed, then this will affect everything that you do, including your ability to cope and exist on a daily/nightly basis. I wouldn't wait for it to get worse. I'd be proactive and pragmatic about it, if you can. Orthopaedic post-op pain is recognized by the medical community as being some of the worst that patients can experience -especially in the foot and ankle area, because of nerve anatomy. So, from that perspective, getting your pain managed is integral to your continuing rehabilitation.

What social support systems do you have in your life?. Family?. Friends?. Chronic post-surgical issues can be especially physically and socially isolating, particularly if you don't feel happy with the outcome, and have unanswered questions and concerns. Were you given a post-surgical time-frame with different 'markers' for your anticipated recovery?. Some surgeons aren't the greatest communicators-very highly technically skilled, but their patient interactions can tend to be a bit minimalist, sometimes. Is there a nurse or a junior doctor/resident doctor in your surgeon's clinic who you could talk with as a follow-up?.

Sorry for the umpteen questions-these might all be aspects that you have already considered. There are many different treatment options and approaches in orthopaedics, and sometimes, it is a matter of trial and error, I'm afraid. As with other clinical specialities, there will always be variations between patient expectations, their clinical circumstances, and what ends up happening for them.

On a personal level, I have found that treating myself as a 'whole' person has really helped. To do this, I've surrounded myself with good people who I know will help and not hinder my surgical plans. Still, it can be a rough road, no denying that. We each cope differently. Periodically, I've found that having a 'talk' therapist has helped me with some of the residual crises that have appeared following surgery. At one point, I had a post-op wound infection that took over a year to heal properly and exacerbated the scar that was left behind- very difficult for me to deal with physically, as well as psychologically.

Pain can really be debilitating in lots of ways. I hope that you can get this addressed, as well as have your lingering questions and concerns answered. My heart goes out to you.

 
Old 02-13-2010, 02:19 PM   #25
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

HI Rainbowapple.

Thank you for your message. I understand and appreciate everything you say. You sound like you've had a bad time too and it's nice of you to take the time to share your story and advice. It's appreciated.

I find that my GP is very helpful and supportive but my surgeon is a man of few words and I never see him unless it's for 2 minutes prior to surgery and he seems pushed for time and gives me very complicated information I don't really understand. I'm seeing my GP on Monday so I'm going to talk to him then - tho I'm dreading it as I have a nasty feeling I'm going to cry in front of him.

As for my post-op care - it's good but I still don't feel I'm getting through to people just how difficult I'm finding the fact that I can't walk properly or that my balance is so bad that I stagger around like an old drunk half the time and that I constantly worry about my future and what my condition means for me long-term. I bounce from feeling quite positive one day to feeling that I'm getting nowhere.
As for post-surgical time frames - not really. I've been told 3-6 months for my tendons to settle post-op and then maybe another up-to-six-months to fully recover by one person and my physio says it can be twice that. No one actually has a clue and it's all guess work from what I can gather. if I ask how long it'll take I'm always told 3-6 months. When I go back in 3-6 months and ask the same question again I'm told another 3-6 months. I'm going round in circles and I'm never closer to the end of all this.

When I have a follow-up review at the hospital I seem to be told that everything is relatively ok and as expected for the time it's been since surgery. I'm also told to work hard at my physio exercises in a manner which suggests that I obviously don't bother doing them at home. This irritates me as I feel like I'm being spoken to like I'm an idiot and that I'm not being listened to when I tell them that I'm doing everything I'm being told to do but something isn't right with my ankle joints and maybe they don't know best after all.
They seem like they think I'm exaggerating and that makes me just wonder why I bother and I might as well just nod in all the right places and leave quietly because there's only so long I can bang my head against the proverbial brick wall before I get a headache. It just sees pointless to say anything half the time as no one at the hospital bloody listens anyway!

I felt quite good when I left my review last Monday and I stil feel relatively OK but I'm still concerned about my future and the adjustments I need to make. I've had a steady job for 20 years and am trained for absolutely nothing else. We're in the grip of the lousiest job market I've seen in my lifetime and I stand no chance at all of getting a job in something I'm not trained for or experienced in. I'm told to re-train. For what? With what? I havent worked in almost 3 years and have zero money to pay for training. I have barely enough money to pay my rent. I just don't know what to do.

Although I know it'll all come right in the end and I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason I can't help wondering when something positive will come from this. I feel so silly because there are worse things in life but I also feel that it's all relative and I'm finding this really hard. I'm on the verge of bankruptcy and my boyfriend and I split up a few months ago. I have a supportive family and am well-blessed with equally wonderful friends but when I close my door at night it's just me. At best my loved-ones can only reassure me it'll all be OK but will it? I know they mean well and I know they'd take away my pain if they could but they can't. I'm lucky to have them though. I don't know if I'd still have my sanity without them!

At 36 I need to get back onto my feet - if you'll excuse the pun! I have to support myself emotionally and financially and I stink at asking for help. I've always been so independant and my independance is being taken away from me and my future in many ways is uncertain now and I don't know how to deal with it. That's very hard for me to admit but I honestly don't know what to do.

I feel so silly! Ignore my moaning. Someone say something funny to lighten the mood.
oh, and hats off to anyone who read this whole post. I'm even annoying myself with my belly-aching!

Much love to you all.
Fluffy. xx

 
Old 02-16-2010, 02:38 PM   #26
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Hi everyone.

Have been discharged from care by my physiotherapist today. Seems the right thing to do as all I can do is work on my balance etc and wait 3 months until I have my next review. I don;t mind not going to physio as I can do it all at home myself anyway and it saves ,e having to catch a 4 bus round trip to the hospital all the time.

Hope you're all well.

Fluffy. xx

 
Old 03-05-2010, 02:47 AM   #27
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Quote:
Originally Posted by heidi35 View Post
HI Fluffy,
Your problems with your tendon seems alot like mine. I have had 3 surgeries on my right peroneal tendon. The first surgery failed and i swithched Drs. The 2nd surgery the new Dr. moved my heel bone over thinking that is was tearing my ankle, this was the most painful surgery because of the screws in my heel. While I was recovering from this surgery about 10 weeks after I slipped and feel in a store and retore the tendon hence the 3rd surgery.The 3rd surgery he took the tendon from the inside of my ankle and moved it to the outside to piggy back the peroneal tendon(sorry my dr. doesnt tell me the medical terms for the surgeries)I have little movement and feeling in my big toe from this surgery. So about 2 weeks before Christmas I went up on my tip toes and heard a pop with lots of pain. Went to Dr. tried aN MRI couldnt see anything because of the screws and did a CT scan that couldnt show if the tendons were tore but showed the were very swollen and enlarged with significant calcifications. Dr. put me in cast for 4 weeks. I had the cast taken off yesterday and am in so much pain today i feel sick to my stomach. I go back to DR. in March and then will decide if I have surgery to take the screws out to get a better look at tendons. The cold also bothers me very much to walk on a cold floor is tourture!I am also frustrated and very tired of being in pain, I had about a year of pain free before this incident.
Hope it helps to know your not alone,
Heidi
Hi There,
I Am Currently Studying Sports Therapy At College.
I'm In My Final Year And At Present I'm Investigating A Peroneal Tendon Rupure For My Graded Unit.
I Was Wondering If There Would Be Any Chance Of Asking You Some Questions Regarding Your Surgery Or If You Could Send Me Any Information You Had Regarding Your Surgery That Would Be Fantastic.
Thanks Very Much Collette x

 
Old 07-22-2010, 12:55 PM   #28
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Me again.

I'm going out of my mind.
It's been 18 months since my right ankle op and 8 months since my left ankle surgery.
I'm struggling to sleep with the acid pain in my ankles and I don't know where to turn. I'm not sure either of the ops have really done me any good and if anything my left ankle is worse with the pain spreading gradually up the side of my calf.
I'm taking the maximum does of co-codamol I'm allowed - 8 in any 24 hour period - and soetimes the pain is so bad I'm housebound with hot water borrles strapped to my ankles or I have both feet submerged in hot water to relieve the pain.

I'm concerned that as the hospital says it's done all it can for me for the time being and it won't consider further surgeries (to pricey especially if they aren't likely to work) or other treatments as nothing even vaguely worked before I had surgery. I'm still signed off sick by my gp until August 21st but when I go back I'm scared because no one seems willing to do anything else to help me that he'll declare me fit for work and I physically can't do it.
I can walk maybe 100 yards before I have to sit down and rest and then when I get up again I'm so sore and stuff it takes me half an hour to be able to walk again anyway.
I'm 36 and I feel 106. I'm so depressed I've started to burst into tears sometimes just thinking about what the hell it is I'm supposed to do but I feel that as it's just a problem with my ankles and I'm not fighting something terminal that I've no business feeling this way.

I don't feel anyone who can help me really wants to and because I've had certain treatments already I've been assigned to the scrapheap. I've tried to get a job where I can sit down more and I get laughed out of interviews as I'm not qualified and no one will make allowances for my condition. No one says as much but when I have to mention I have this problem I can see the looks on their faces that they feel I'm not up to the job and that they could just as easily hire someone who isn't going to be a nuisance.

I feel like I've been written off but I can't bring myself to belly-ache to my GP. He's been brilliant over the last few years since my ankle problems started and I can see he's frustrated that he can't do more to help.
I just don;t know what to do or who to ask for help.

Someone please help me. The tears are flowing now just writing this and I can't go on like this.
Thanks.
Fluffy. x

 
Old 12-09-2010, 01:05 AM   #29
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffy999 View Post
Me again.

I'm going out of my mind.
It's been 18 months since my right ankle op and 8 months since my left ankle surgery.
I'm struggling to sleep with the acid pain in my ankles and I don't know where to turn. I'm not sure either of the ops have really done me any good and if anything my left ankle is worse with the pain spreading gradually up the side of my calf.
I'm taking the maximum does of co-codamol I'm allowed - 8 in any 24 hour period - and soetimes the pain is so bad I'm housebound with hot water borrles strapped to my ankles or I have both feet submerged in hot water to relieve the pain.

I'm concerned that as the hospital says it's done all it can for me for the time being and it won't consider further surgeries (to pricey especially if they aren't likely to work) or other treatments as nothing even vaguely worked before I had surgery. I'm still signed off sick by my gp until August 21st but when I go back I'm scared because no one seems willing to do anything else to help me that he'll declare me fit for work and I physically can't do it.
I can walk maybe 100 yards before I have to sit down and rest and then when I get up again I'm so sore and stuff it takes me half an hour to be able to walk again anyway.
I'm 36 and I feel 106. I'm so depressed I've started to burst into tears sometimes just thinking about what the hell it is I'm supposed to do but I feel that as it's just a problem with my ankles and I'm not fighting something terminal that I've no business feeling this way.

I don't feel anyone who can help me really wants to and because I've had certain treatments already I've been assigned to the scrapheap. I've tried to get a job where I can sit down more and I get laughed out of interviews as I'm not qualified and no one will make allowances for my condition. No one says as much but when I have to mention I have this problem I can see the looks on their faces that they feel I'm not up to the job and that they could just as easily hire someone who isn't going to be a nuisance.

I feel like I've been written off but I can't bring myself to belly-ache to my GP. He's been brilliant over the last few years since my ankle problems started and I can see he's frustrated that he can't do more to help.
I just don;t know what to do or who to ask for help.

Someone please help me. The tears are flowing now just writing this and I can't go on like this.
Thanks.
Fluffy. x

 
Old 12-09-2010, 01:31 AM   #30
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Re: Peroneal surgery failed - help?

Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffy999 View Post
Me again.

I'm going out of my mind.
It's been 18 months since my right ankle op and 8 months since my left ankle surgery.
I'm struggling to sleep with the acid pain in my ankles and I don't know where to turn. I'm not sure either of the ops have really done me any good and if anything my left ankle is worse with the pain spreading gradually up the side of my calf.
I'm taking the maximum does of co-codamol I'm allowed - 8 in any 24 hour period - and soetimes the pain is so bad I'm housebound with hot water borrles strapped to my ankles or I have both feet submerged in hot water to relieve the pain.

I'm concerned that as the hospital says it's done all it can for me for the time being and it won't consider further surgeries (to pricey especially if they aren't likely to work) or other treatments as nothing even vaguely worked before I had surgery. I'm still signed off sick by my gp until August 21st but when I go back I'm scared because no one seems willing to do anything else to help me that he'll declare me fit for work and I physically can't do it.
I can walk maybe 100 yards before I have to sit down and rest and then when I get up again I'm so sore and stuff it takes me half an hour to be able to walk again anyway.
I'm 36 and I feel 106. I'm so depressed I've started to burst into tears sometimes just thinking about what the hell it is I'm supposed to do but I feel that as it's just a problem with my ankles and I'm not fighting something terminal that I've no business feeling this way.

I don't feel anyone who can help me really wants to and because I've had certain treatments already I've been assigned to the scrapheap. I've tried to get a job where I can sit down more and I get laughed out of interviews as I'm not qualified and no one will make allowances for my condition. No one says as much but when I have to mention I have this problem I can see the looks on their faces that they feel I'm not up to the job and that they could just as easily hire someone who isn't going to be a nuisance.

I feel like I've been written off but I can't bring myself to belly-ache to my GP. He's been brilliant over the last few years since my ankle problems started and I can see he's frustrated that he can't do more to help.
I just don;t know what to do or who to ask for help.

Someone please help me. The tears are flowing now just writing this and I can't go on like this.
Thanks.
Fluffy. x
Hi Fluffy,
I really feel for you. I don't know what health care is like in the UK but here in the US, we are able to get second and third opinions. Even from different specialists. Is this possible for you? I've been in chronic pain since a sever fall off a ladder 18 months ago. I shattered my calcaneous (heel) bone. It was absolute mush. After that repair, which took forever, I was still in an astounding amount of pain. I would tell the Dr. where it hurt and insisted that I thought I did some damage to my tendons. He finally agreed to to a MRI but it only showed inflamation. I was to go home and keep it elevated which is all I had been doing. When I would question him he would just roll his eyes. Finally a year later I saw another Doctor that actually found more bone damage that I had fixed but still I had the same pain that would not go away. He did another MRI and did see some damage but not much. I insisted on getting it fixed and when he went in he found an extensive amount of damage that did not show on the MRI. Here a year earlier, the other Dr just rolled his eyes like I was faking it. My point is, don't give up hope. If your Dr can't help you, go see someone else if you can. Im happy to hear you did physical therapy. That is vital if you ever want to get any quality of life back. It's hard as hell but you must do it. At least that is what EVERYONE that has been through anything like this has been preaching to me.

I was touched by you saying how sad you are, that at times you want to end it all. It's exactly how I have been feeling. It's shocking how in an instant your life can be yanked out from under you. Like you, I keep telling myself it's only my foot, I should have been injured much worse. But it doesn't stop the pain that never goes away. Pain is so draining. Combine that with the frustration of not being the person I once was is downright overbearing at times. I was so capable before. I was very active, did yoga, loads of energy, basically unstoppable... I though. The ladder taught me otherwise. Now I can barely go to the bathroom or brush my teeth without help. The healthy vital, vibrant person I once was, has been taken down to a helpless cripple. I normally don't verbalize my fear, pain or frustration because people don't want to hear it. As positive and fine and I try to convince people I am, the frustration and anger never goes away. It's like I'm mourning the person I lost. I am only mentioning this to you because I heard the same kind of hopelessness in your posts. Part of my frustration is that no one knows the mental torture. I feel like I am alone. Since I am going to be bed ridden again for quite some time, I decided to see if anyone out there had any idea what I am going through. I am comforted to know that there are loads of people that do. Just like you. Maybe we can help each other keep the faith that one day God willing, this will all be over. Keep fighting I have and now maybe this last surgery will be the beginning of the end to all the suffering.... Please let me know how you are doing. Don't give up. If someone cant help, go to someone else if you can.... Take care, Jane

 
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