Re: Occupational Hazzard: Fueler
The symptoms you have already described are enough to indicate that your husband has problems that need to be addressed by a doctor. What I would do is make an appointment for him, describing to the office just what you have told us. Then inform your husband that he has an appointment with the doctor. Period. Refuse to discuss it. If he argues, respond with "the appointment is on Thursday at 10". Then walk a way or get busy with something else. Only if he breaks down and admits that he is afraid would I continue with the discussion, because his feelings are valid. All other topics (doctors are quacks, i'm fine, I'm not sick enough to see a doctor, I'll miss work, etc) should be ignored. "The appointment is on Thursday at 10".
I've done this a few times with my husband. He eventually learned that when I put my foot down I meant it. Sometimes my insistance that he see a doctor resulted in the doctor sending him home with a healthy report card. I remember one time when my husband was 40, I saw a show about prostate cancer, and made an appointment for him. He wasn't happy about it, but he showed up. The doctor asked "so why are you here?" My husband answered, "My wife sent me after seeing a show". The doctor laughed and said that lots of women must have seen that show because he was seeing a lot of men in his office for a prostate test all of a sudden. He told my husband to come back in 10 years.
I don't mean to trivialize your concerns. Your description certainly sounds like he really needs to see a doctor. Hopefully the doctor will say that it's something minor and easily treatable. But you won't know that until your husband goes in for tests. If you or I had those symptoms we'd certainly be in the doctor's office right away. But sometimes men need a bit of help getting themselves there. Make an appointment for him.
And let us know how it goes.