My brother mentally unstable? - General Health Message Board

Abney · 12-29-2008, 01:06 AM

Well, I'm starting this thread about my 18- year old adopted brother because he is moving back home and my mom is going to be wanting to take him to physcologists and such. He has ADD. My question is do you think he has bipolar disorder or something else too? His bio parents were both into drugs and may have been during his bio mom's pregnancy.

Symntoms

When he was in elementary school-
*Not Social
*Aggresive
*Insomnia
*Nightmares
*Tantrums (Scream and Kicking on the floor up until he was 12)
*Didn't mind much pain
* Depression

High School-
*Drug Addict
*Insomnia
*Would Scream and cuss, slam his door and 5 mins later come down to apologize to my mom
*Depression

Now-
*Drug Addict
*Insomnia
*Freaks out at random stressful moments
*Out of touch... in his own world

He is a drop out junkie but he is not stupid. He graduated validictorian of the military juvenile deliquent school he attended but couldn't get a college scholarship because he expressed his anger issues by hurling a chair across the room at his commanding officer.Look, my brother put me through hell as a child but still I love him to death and I want the best for him. i want him so bad to get better. I miss him. When he was little he looked up to my other brother who is 20 currently. The eldest brother's name is Marshall and he's been in jail, prison, and boot camp, so he isn't the best role model. When him and my other brother are together Timmy forgets all responsibility. When I look at him now I don't see the brother who use to put my hair up when my mom was working and tuck me in when my dad went to bed early. Marshall was never really there when I was young but timmy was. I sat in the waiting room during countless counseler sessions. He's sick and he needs help but no one wants to/ dosen't know how to help him.

I need to know if he has bi- polar disorder or another personality disorder...

P.s. Also there is this girl at my school who has ADD, ADHD, bipolar disorder and she is medicated and the thing is it makes her act really strange and crazy but its the complete opposite of how Timmy (18 yr old bro) acted even when he took his meds.

sophie56 · 12-29-2008, 08:08 PM

Hi, I see no one has posted. I don't know how to help you. You have to take care of yourself before you can take care of others. You need guidance. Is there someone you can talk to, to let them know what you are going through? I know you want to help your brother and pray that you find the answers you are looking for.

ibake&pray · 12-30-2008, 12:20 PM

HOn, this isn't something that can be diagnosed by a list of symptoms over a board. Your brother is defininatly in need of help-professional help that will take time to straighten out, provided that he wants to be straightened out. Your brother will only get better when he decides that he wants help. With his history of drug issues he has a long road ahead of him.

I admire the fact that you want him to get better and that you still want the best for him, but you need to take care of yourself first and foremost. Please make sure that you get the help and counseling that you need also, as this will be a very stressful time in your house if your brother continues to use drugs or isn't responding well to the therapy. Make sure that you can talk to your mom and dad about this ok?

Good luck....

writeleft · 12-30-2008, 01:13 PM

Dear Abney,

My heart goes out to you and your brother. I too, have a lifetime of experience with my own adopted sister's issues...and I am 48 years old, she is 50.

Our whole family has been seriously affected by my only sister, who has singlehandedly destroyed my parents (who are now in their mid eighties). It has only been within the last 3 month's or so that we have concluded she is a sociopath. Of course, I am not suggesting that your brother is a sociopath. Just not to wait 30 or 40 more years, until it's too late.

I would certainly seek counseling for yourself, to help you understand what you can do for yourself, as not to let him destroy you, while you desperately try to help him. Make sure that while you are trying to help, you are not accidentally hurting yourself too.

It sounds like he has many deep seated issues which you certainly cannot sort out, and only a true expert in mental health could unravel all the layers that reveal the underlying problems. Like the other poster said, this is a long process that he himself must seek out.

I understand how painful this is for you to watch, and try to "fix". We are here to support you, and help you through. You will find that there are many folks on the board who are experienced with similar family struggles, and will be happy to share their advise.

mscat40 · 12-30-2008, 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Abney

Well, I'm starting this thread about my 18- year old adopted brother because he is moving back home and my mom is going to be wanting to take him to physcologists and such. He has ADD. My question is do you think he has bipolar disorder or something else too? His bio parents were both into drugs and may have been during his bio mom's pregnancy.

Symntoms

When he was in elementary school-
*Not Social
*Aggresive
*Insomnia
*Nightmares
*Tantrums (Scream and Kicking on the floor up until he was 12)
*Didn't mind much pain
* Depression

High School-
*Drug Addict
*Insomnia
*Would Scream and cuss, slam his door and 5 mins later come down to apologize to my mom
*Depression

Now-
*Drug Addict
*Insomnia
*Freaks out at random stressful moments
*Out of touch... in his own world

He is a drop out junkie but he is not stupid. He graduated validictorian of the military juvenile deliquent school he attended but couldn't get a college scholarship because he expressed his anger issues by hurling a chair across the room at his commanding officer.Look, my brother put me through hell as a child but still I love him to death and I want the best for him. i want him so bad to get better. I miss him. When he was little he looked up to my other brother who is 20 currently. The eldest brother's name is Marshall and he's been in jail, prison, and boot camp, so he isn't the best role model. When him and my other brother are together Timmy forgets all responsibility. When I look at him now I don't see the brother who use to put my hair up when my mom was working and tuck me in when my dad went to bed early. Marshall was never really there when I was young but timmy was. I sat in the waiting room during countless counseler sessions. He's sick and he needs help but no one wants to/ dosen't know how to help him.

I need to know if he has bi- polar disorder or another personality disorder...

P.s. Also there is this girl at my school who has ADD, ADHD, bipolar disorder and she is medicated and the thing is it makes her act really strange and crazy but its the complete opposite of how Timmy (18 yr old bro) acted even when he took his meds.

I could not tell you what is going on with him .... He is still young, and can get the professional help he needs in order to turn his life around.
Mental illness is very complicated and their is so much into it.
My first thought was that he was a drug baby... These particular people do grow up with a lifetime of problems. AND it is not from a mental illness. It is how the brain works .
But, he is intelligent, so that is a major plus. And he is only 18 yrs old, anther big plus. I think he needs to know his family loves him and accepts him unconditionally.HE also needs structure, consistency , anger management and he needs to strenghthen his skills.
Perhjaps getting him into a community college would be good , and a part time job, with counseling, and psych help, he could do well in life.